rose_anne

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Offline (the 07/09/2015 at 11:26pm)

rose_anne

0Fucked!

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  • Number of visits : 649
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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rose_anne's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Judgmental

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The rules are the rules

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rose_anne's favorite FMLs

Today, I moved to a big city, alone, from a small town. After convincing myself it wasn't that scary, I hailed my first cab. The driver spent the 30 minute ride from the airport telling me about how "sometimes, you just gotta shoot a guy" because if they steal your shoes, they deserve it. FML

by smalltownkid / 03/01/2015 at 6:22pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, my sister came out of the closet. By which I mean she came out as the pregnant mother of my boyfriend's child. FML

by Anonymous / 03/01/2015 at 2:03pm / United States (Ohio) / Kids

Today, while on the train heading to my new job, my coat caught between two seats. I didn't notice until my stop. I whacked myself in the face in front of everyone trying to get it free, and ended up missing my stop. When I finally got to work, I was told not to bother coming in again. FML

by Anonymous / 03/01/2015 at 8:31am / United Kingdom (Surrey) / Work

Today, my drunken mom began to frantically scream "YEAH" "WOO HOO" and "ALRIGHT" at some kindergarteners that were singing Amazing Grace in honor of a restaurant owner who had recently died. FML

by RadioactiveKush / 03/01/2015 at 2:07am / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was checking the family's computer history, and found that "Shrek Porn" had been searched multiple times. FML

by mszoe / 03/01/2015 at 1:05am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, while cleaning my son's room, I found an envelope labelled "PRIVATE AND CONFIDENTIAL" under his bed. I opened it, only to find it was a glitter bomb. I couldn't get it all cleaned off myself before he got home. He just said "HAH! Serves you right!" and went to his room smirking. FML

by Anonymous / 02/28/2015 at 1:11pm / United States (Oregon) / Kids

Today, I sharted during my wedding vows. FML

by Anonymous / 02/28/2015 at 9:16am / Denmark (Nordjylland) / Miscellaneous

Today, I saw my grandma had registered on Facebook, so I wrote a welcome post on her wall. She replied "Delete." several times, then called me, accusing me of "hacking" her and demanding that I remove my name from her page at once. FML

by Y_Y / 02/27/2015 at 3:20pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, the neighbors called the cops because they heard "gun shots". My girlfriend and I were popping bubble wrap. FML

by We're still popping them / 02/26/2015 at 7:35pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was doing laundry, so I decided to wash my cat's blanket. He chased me down the stairs into the basement, and I slightly closed the door behind me so he wouldn't follow me. He pushed the door shut, which automatically locks. I was trapped down there for 3 hours until my mom came home. FML

by jynxisadouchebag / 02/26/2015 at 7:08pm / United States (California) / Animals

Today, my bed fell through my floor. With me on it. FML

by wtf?? / 02/09/2015 at 8:26am / Saint Vincent and the Grenadines / Miscellaneous

Today, I was awoken by the sound of my pet lizard eating my other pet lizard. FML

Today, at work, a good song came on and I started dancing to it. I guess security thought my Michael Jackson crotch-grab was funny, because a printout of it is now pinned in our break room. FML

by Anonymous / 02/07/2015 at 4:09am / United States (Colorado) / Work

Today, my 97-pound pitbull wagged and chased his tail while I was being mugged. FML

by ZAnon / 02/06/2015 at 2:06am / United States (Texas) / Animals

Today, my professor cancelled class so I turned off my alarm. When I woke up, I checked my email again. There was no email from my professor. It was a dream. FML

by DreamsDontComeTrue / 02/05/2015 at 1:15am / United States (Virginia) / Miscellaneous