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Mobility
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50 favourites
Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!
Today, I heard my grandma sobbing in her room. After finally convincing her to tell me what was wrong, she confessed to watching a porn video last night. She thinks not being able to sleep afterwards is a sign that God is punishing her, and that she's damned our family to hell. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18625) - you deserved it (1274)
On 05/23/2013 at 1:48pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Romania (Buzau)
Today, I have to defend my client in court. The defense that my client wants me to use is, "It's not a robbery if you have swag" and then goes on saying, "The judge is bound to let me go after he sees my swag." FML
I agree, your life sucks (34754) - you deserved it (2593)
On 05/22/2013 at 9:57pm - work - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I was out on a family walk, when I overheard two women talking to each other. One of them was wondering how a kid with such good looking parents and grandparents could be so ugly. That kid is my daughter. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30312) - you deserved it (2414)
On 05/22/2013 at 12:47pm - kids - by Kittykat900 (woman) - United Kingdom (York)
Today, at work, my boss made me go outside and wash people's cars for free. I work at Verizon. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33203) - you deserved it (2983)
On 05/21/2013 at 2:31am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Indiana)
Today, I got a new cat. It was fine for a couple of hours until it gave birth in my kitchen. The seller claims to have no idea that it was pregnant. Now I have to take care of 7 cats instead of 2. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29218) - you deserved it (4828)
On 05/20/2013 at 7:23pm - animals - by catcraze - United States (Colorado)
Today, my wife gave birth to a beautiful baby girl. She's perfect in every way, except for her birth mark. It's under the corner of her left eye and looks almost exactly like a prison teardrop tattoo. FML
I agree, your life sucks (40905) - you deserved it (5671)
On 05/19/2013 at 2:33pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Alberta)
Today, my bag got stolen with all of my belongings at the beach. After being forced to ask strangers for money, I then travelled home on the train for an hour, wearing only a bikini. FML
I agree, your life sucks (41807) - you deserved it (4238)
On 05/18/2013 at 4:57am - misc - by Chelsea - Australia (Western Australia)
Today, my boyfriend yelled at me. Apparently I'm not the "classy girl" he thought I was, and he's not comfortable "doing such vile things in public." I had tried to hold his hand. FML
I agree, your life sucks (42775) - you deserved it (3192)
On 05/15/2013 at 2:43am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, I woke up to my friend stroking my face with the bottom of his foot and whispering, "Shh, you're okay." FML
I agree, your life sucks (33881) - you deserved it (3373)
On 05/13/2013 at 6:05pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Hawaii)
Today, I was feeling down about being the only single person out of a group of eight friends. Out of desperation, I made up "Jonny", a hot fitness instructor whom I recently hooked up with. Now "Jonny" and I have been invited to a friends' night out. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15164) - you deserved it (57900)
On 05/12/2013 at 5:09pm - love - by forever alone - United Kingdom
Today, my family flew out to surprise my grandma for her 70th birthday. When we arrived, she and my grandpa were both sitting on the couch, high, smoking a joint. FML
I agree, your life sucks (44083) - you deserved it (9430)
On 05/08/2013 at 2:59am - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Today, the girl that I've been madly in love with was demanding I tell her who I liked. I told her no, I should just keep it a secret, but she demanded I tell her. After I told her, the only response I got was, "You're right. You should have kept that a secret." FML
I agree, your life sucks (54876) - you deserved it (4863)
On 05/06/2013 at 2:49am - love - by walkingdead_1029 - United States (Arizona)
Today, I realized my favorite pen advertises a vaginal cream. I've been letting people borrow it for months. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32788) - you deserved it (7058)
On 05/01/2013 at 12:28pm - misc - by MrConcise (man) - United States
Today, my mom asked me what a MILF is. Apparently that's her nickname at work. FML
I agree, your life sucks (47762) - you deserved it (3364)
On 05/01/2013 at 11:55am - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Today, at work at a farm, we got a new calf. It looked like it had to poop, but was having difficulty. About four hours later it still hadn't pooped. Turns out it was born without an actual butthole. It was there, just sealed up by skin. I literally had to cut this poor calf a new butthole. FML
I agree, your life sucks (68900) - you deserved it (3077)
On 04/23/2013 at 10:01pm - animals - by halliemarie1818 - United States
Monday 20 May 2013
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