About rockyraccoon28 : hi, i'm emily.
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I agree, their lives suck
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rockyraccoon28's favorite FMLs
by Anonymous / 03/22/2012 at 1:13am / United States (Washington) / Work
by daddy-o / 03/14/2012 at 3:51am / United States (Utah) / Miscellaneous
Today, I went swimming in a pond. I came out covered in leeches. Terrified, I screamed, flailed about and cried out for help until half a dozen people ran over. One of them was kind enough to point out that those leeches I was so afraid of were actually patches of mud. FML
by asdfBUTT / 03/05/2012 at 8:36pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous
Today, I choked on a gummy bear and ended up in the emergency room. The first thing the doctor said to me was, "Well, that must have been 'beary' uncomfortable." The entire room burst into laughter. FML
by Kayla / 03/05/2012 at 7:43pm / United States / Health
by Miss_Kristen / 02/26/2012 at 10:31am / United States (Missouri) / Work
by Djcc / 02/21/2012 at 1:03pm / United States / Love
by Kevin / 02/13/2012 at 1:00am / United States / Love
by Yo mom / 12/27/2011 at 2:12am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 12/05/2011 at 12:23am / United States (North Carolina) / Intimacy
Today, on the subway, a woman got off without her suitcase. I grabbed the case, chased her onto the platform, and shouted, "You forgot your suitcase!" while the doors closed behind me. In actual fact, it wasn't her suitcase, and its actual owner was still on the train. FML
by Lavalise / 11/05/2011 at 3:11am / France / Transportation
by lolilovemyboyfriend / 10/19/2011 at 10:37am / United States (North Carolina) / Intimacy
by Andrew / 10/11/2011 at 9:11pm / United States (Florida) / Love
by ThisBlows / 09/21/2011 at 1:20pm / United States (Rhode Island) / Intimacy
Today, at a campfire, I whipped out my guitar to serenade this girl I like with a Nick Drake song. When I was done, she said it was nice, but that my singing voice sounds a bit like the Swedish Chef from the Muppet Show. A couple of people nearby burst out laughing in agreement. FML
by Branski / 07/28/2011 at 8:27pm / United States / Miscellaneous
by womanlover12345 / 07/18/2011 at 12:05pm / Spain / Love
- 1Today, my boyfriend said I didn't give him enough attention because of my busy work life. So… he… 2Today, I was making the daily commute to work when suddenly my mother calls me, crying that there's… 3Today, my boyfriend presented me with a 30-minute montage video of him working out and flexing his…
- Today, a sweet old man came knocking. He asked about my elderly neighbor who he has been trying to… Today, I learned that if a friend ever suggests you sleep with her boyfriend, it's probably because… Today, I went to a grad school fair. Tuition costs more than I make in a year. I'm thirty. I think…