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About rizzle120 : I am whatever you say I am. If I wasn't then why would I say I am?
Beginner
You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.
Checking you out
You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.
Consolation prize
Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.
Today, the lady running the pastry shop asked who I buy the second pastry for every day. I lied and told her that it's for a coworker. I eat them both. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6725) - you deserved it (22783)
On 02/15/2011 at 1:25am - misc - by a fatty -
Today, during dinner, my family had a discussion about the color of poop. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20752) - you deserved it (3184)
On 02/15/2011 at 12:50am - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Today, the only person to wish me a Happy Valentine's day was a wrong number calling my cell phone. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23547) - you deserved it (2605)
On 02/14/2011 at 10:07pm - love - by moe (woman) - United States (Georgia)
Today, I was working as an intern at a day care. One of the kids touched my chest a couple of times, and I jokingly told him that he shouldn't touch old and ugly women like me. So he started groping the little girls instead. When the other teachers asked him why, he said I had told him to. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23113) - you deserved it (8373)
On 02/14/2011 at 1:51pm - kids - by Mikabe (woman) - Sweden (Varmlands Lan)
Today, after soccer practice I was looking for my dad. Last night he was an hour late, so I was pretty pissed. When I spotted him, I saw him flirting with a much younger woman. I then tried throwing my soccer ball to his feet, but ended up slamming his head. Only to find out he wasn't my dad. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6293) - you deserved it (22286)
On 10/21/2010 at 4:21am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Louisiana)
Today, I found out that my girlfriend of 6 months is not actually on vacation with her cousin but is moving in with her fiancé. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22265) - you deserved it (1910)
On 10/20/2010 at 10:04pm - love - by mook05 - United States
Today, I was changing in the back seat of my new truck when it started to roll backwards. In my haste to reach the brake, I hit my head and fell face first into the steering wheel. I then realized that it wasn't rolling. The car next to me was just pulling out. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7585) - you deserved it (16868)
On 09/27/2010 at 3:22pm - misc - by milhouse86 (man) - United States (North Carolina)
Today, I told my 3 year old daughter to behave or I'd spank her. She looked right at me and said "Bring it." FML
I agree, your life sucks (23239) - you deserved it (20151)
On 09/12/2010 at 9:38pm - kids - by Username - Sent from mobile version
Today, I was in a public restroom with my 4 year old daughter. I took her in the stall with me, and as I was using the restroom she looked down and loudly asked, "Mommy! Why do you have a beard on your peepee?!!" Then I heard everybody in the stalls next to us laughing. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33335) - you deserved it (9131)
On 08/22/2010 at 2:58am - kids - by Bailey - United States (Nebraska)
Today, as I showered, I sneezed, hit my face on the wall, got shampoo in my eyes, slipped on a bar of soap, bashed my head on the wall as I fell, grabbed at the walls to stop me from falling and happened to turn off the cold water, scorching me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36857) - you deserved it (4057)
On 01/17/2010 at 1:22am - health - by Concussed (man) - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, my five year old daughter was watching cartoons on TV. Then a Barbie commercial came on. My daughter sang along with the theme song "Be who you want to be, B-A-R-B-I-E." She then turned to me and said "Mom, I want to be a hooker." FML
I agree, your life sucks (149042) - you deserved it (22383)
On 06/23/2009 at 1:56pm - kids - by ....... (woman) - United States (Colorado)
Today, my son said, "Mommy, sometimes my pee-pee goes up like a stick." I replied, "Well, honey, that's normal and okay." I then asked when it happens, to which he said, "Well, sometimes when watching Scooby Doo and Shaggy comes out dressed in lady clothes." FML
I agree, your life sucks (255635) - you deserved it (35247)
On 03/20/2009 at 12:15am - kids - by ScoobieDoo (woman) - United States (Washington)
Today, I forgot to do my French homework, but since it was an online worksheet, I told my teacher my internet wasn't working. I told her with an e-mail. FML
I agree, your life sucks (44508) - you deserved it (517689)
On 02/28/2009 at 2:07pm - misc - by ihavepinkbackpac (woman) - United States (California)
Today, my husband dropped me off at work. Ten minutes later I got a text saying "I just dropped the b*tch off I'll be there in a few baby, miss you". I asked him about it he said "I don't know what you're talking about Megan". My name isn't Megan. Not even close. FML
I agree, your life sucks (753795) - you deserved it (63739)
On 02/28/2009 at 6:10am - love - by thatsucks (woman) - United Kingdom (Nottinghamshire)
Today, I texted my boyfriend saying "Hi." His response: "I got your best friend pregnant". FML
I agree, your life sucks (381349) - you deserved it (34545)
On 02/07/2009 at 10:08pm - misc - by bittersweet - United States (New York)
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