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rickster1000

Offline (the 09/29/2014 at 6:33am) | Search for a member

rickster1000

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rickster1000's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend blew me off yet again because he claims he has a responsibility as a "crew leader" to train and recruit members at all times, to accommodate all time zones. GTA V is ruining our relationship. FML

Today, I yet again had to pretend to be a dumb bimbo so that my boyfriend wouldn't get upset over the fact that, in some cases, I might be smarter than him. FML

#20913509
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36939) - you deserved it (20875)

On 10/09/2013 at 3:51am - love - by yeah hun i think insects arent animals too (woman) - Germany (Sachsen)

Today, I asked my friend to crop me out of her profile picture on Facebook because I look terrible in it. She responded that she wasn't going to, because it made her look better. FML

#20913413
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39901) - you deserved it (4952)

On 10/09/2013 at 1:21am - misc - by Anon - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, I was working a kid's birthday party dressed as a clown. The child's mother made me change because he was scared of clowns. The only thing I had in my car was a princess costume that was owned by a girl co-worker. So for 4 hours I had to entertain in a tight pink dress. I'm a guy. FML

#20913049
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41621) - you deserved it (4448)

On 10/08/2013 at 9:19pm - kids - by Allycat (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I got my daughter's school pictures. Instead of smiling, she did the duck face. She's 6. FML

#20912722
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45929) - you deserved it (7518)

On 10/08/2013 at 5:16pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, I passed my math test with flying colors. My dad thought I had cheated, so he emailed the school and told them that I had. They lowered my grade. FML

#20912578
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57459) - you deserved it (3286)

On 10/08/2013 at 3:17pm - misc - by mathgenius - Norway (Hordaland)

Today, being so desperate for money, I accepted a job in which I get shot at with paintballs for 6 hours. FML

#20911674
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40133) - you deserved it (4763)

On 10/07/2013 at 10:08pm - work - by BOHICA123 (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was playing soccer when a player kicked the ball at my crotch. In pain, I kneeled down. The referee came up to me and whispered, "The smaller they are, the more it hurts." FML

#20911508
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41506) - you deserved it (3591)

On 10/07/2013 at 8:21pm - misc - by Agax (man) - United States (California)

Today, I have been home sick and depressed for so long that I just found Oreo crumbs in my belly button. FML

#20911052
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34522) - you deserved it (15693)

On 10/07/2013 at 2:55pm - health - by Sadness (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was working behind the bar at a club. After serving drinks to a guy, he asked me if I could carry them outside to the two girls waiting for him. I scowled at him and told him I wasn't a waitress. That's when I realised he had one arm. FML

#20910594
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22005) - you deserved it (51536)

On 10/07/2013 at 3:37am - work - by bitch (woman) - Australia

Today, a friend thought it would be funny to shove me over; I faceplanted. I was going to say "F*ck you" and "I will kill you". It came out as "I will f*ck you." He's still laughing. FML

#20910543
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43279) - you deserved it (7288)

On 10/07/2013 at 2:11am - misc - by Ashley - United States (California)

Today, my coworker convinced a little girl that teddy bears are actually the bodies of dead baby bears. I work at Build-a-Bear-Workshop, and we were working a 4-year-old's birthday party. FML

#20910133
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41988) - you deserved it (2864)

On 10/06/2013 at 9:11pm - kids - by TeddyBearKiller (woman) - United States

Today, I repeatedly had to ask people to please stop groping the mannequins. FML

Today, I introduced my girlfriend to my mom. The first thing my mom did was look at her breasts and mention that no matter what happens, hers were the first that I suckled on. FML

#20909928
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50448) - you deserved it (3572)

On 10/06/2013 at 5:54pm - love - by UHM (man) - United States

Today, I told my coworkers that I was going on a date tonight so they would think I have a social life. One of them spotted me while I was eating alone at McDonalds. FML



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