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ricardof

Offline (the 01/20/2016 at 7:40pm) | Search for a member

ricardof

28Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Monday 16 December 1940 (75 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1412
  • Number of comments : 28
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About ricardof : hi, feel free to message me if you want : )

ricardof's page activity

Visits<b>demix</b> - the 02/10/2016 at 7:21am<b>KVYLV</b> - the 02/06/2016 at 8:47am<b>evilscorpi</b> - the 01/25/2016 at 7:35pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 01/20/2016 at 8:03pm<b>missmorggan</b> - the 01/20/2016 at 4:47pm<b>CelesteGomes</b> - the 01/09/2016 at 10:53pm<b>Cherryta</b> - the 01/03/2016 at 7:40pm<b>szaffi</b> - the 01/03/2016 at 2:54pm<b>cheetos3838</b> - the 12/23/2015 at 12:42am<b>CreepinCow</b> - the 12/21/2015 at 8:46pm<b>UhHuhHoney</b> - the 12/21/2015 at 12:18pm<b>redstone7693</b> - the 12/20/2015 at 12:49pm<b>violetsweety</b> - the 12/10/2015 at 4:17am<b>Mons</b> - the 12/07/2015 at 8:43pm<b>SnowFangedBeauty</b> - the 12/04/2015 at 9:09pm<b>MomentoMori</b> - the 12/04/2015 at 2:20pm<b>EATMEUP</b> - the 12/04/2015 at 12:07am<b>speakfreely</b> - the 12/03/2015 at 7:31pm

Fucked!<b>melons</b> - the 11/02/2015 at 2:15pm<b>CelesteGomes</b> - the 10/13/2015 at 2:48am<b>FabChick14</b> - the 07/13/2015 at 11:32pm<b>HarryHirsch</b> - the 07/06/2015 at 1:35am<b>ILikeKoalas</b> - the 06/16/2015 at 4:12am<b>herpderpcx</b> - the 06/08/2015 at 11:48am<b>funneh1</b> - the 05/09/2015 at 7:59pm<b>random_funnygirl</b> - the 05/08/2015 at 12:10pm<b>Jamilal16</b> - the 05/02/2015 at 3:19pm<b>Cherryta</b> - the 04/22/2015 at 8:32pm<b>phantomofmind</b> - the 04/17/2015 at 2:31am<b>jessicamoore</b> - the 04/14/2015 at 10:58pm<b>Woahh78</b> - the 04/13/2015 at 4:34am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/10/2015 at 10:07pm<b>buckdharma</b> - the 04/06/2015 at 5:18am<b>peacheso</b> - the 03/20/2015 at 12:01am<b>speakfreely</b> - the 02/20/2015 at 8:28pm<b>RoseWithThorns</b> - the 01/31/2015 at 7:01am

ricardof's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

See all of ricardof's badges

ricardof's favorite FMLs

Today, I had fallen asleep in the back of a friend's car on the way home from a night out. When I woke up, they were in the middle of a full-on make out session. I had to pretend to be asleep for 20 minutes until they decided to "wake me up". FML

#21505784
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18914) - you deserved it (2880)

On 12/20/2015 at 8:26am - love - by mikmak - United States (North Carolina)

Today, while shopping, I suddenly got the terrible urge to use the bathroom. I already had several items and my 5-year-old niece in tow, so I hurried to checkout. I ended up pissing myself. FML

#21486275
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20342) - you deserved it (4389)

On 10/30/2015 at 7:53pm - misc - by Lydlsis (woman) - United States

Today, I dropped my phone between my legs and tried to catch it with my thighs. Instead, the phone fell through just as I crushed my own balls with my legs. FML

#21486155
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19536) - you deserved it (4714)

On 10/30/2015 at 1:01pm - health - by MedChew - Malaysia (Kuala Lumpur)

Today, I walked in on my best friend with his hand down my girlfriend's pants and her moaning for him to "keep going". She had the brass balls to claim she had a "tummy ache" and that he was just rubbing her stomach better. I may be a total dumbass, but I'm not THAT stupid. FML

#21483470
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35253) - you deserved it (2195)

On 10/23/2015 at 4:10pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (New Brunswick)

Today, a cute guy approached me at a nightclub. I was really excited, until he drunkenly slurred "Babe, I'd suck the farts from your asshole!" and then threw up everywhere. FML

#21455978
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24236) - you deserved it (2212)

On 08/14/2015 at 12:50pm - misc - by Brooke (woman) - United States (California)

Today, a bunch of friends and I went skinny dipping in a pond. The guys all grabbed the ladies' underpants and waved then around. My bloody pad was inside of one of them. FML

#21451285
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27240) - you deserved it (14502)

On 08/03/2015 at 11:29am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, during a blowjob, my girlfriend decided to try something new by squeezing my balls as hard as she could as I came, for a "more intense orgasm". All she gave me was a ruptured testicle. FML

#21448216
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31402) - you deserved it (2660)

On 07/27/2015 at 8:08pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I had to explain to my incredibly sheltered 15-year-old brother that no, you don't wear condoms on your balls, and that they don't work by squeezing your balls so the sperm are blocked from coming out when you ejaculate. FML

#21443849
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24971) - you deserved it (2201)

On 07/19/2015 at 2:02am - kids - by facepalming all the way (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, my psycho ex girlfriend got up in my face after I dumped her. She said I'm going to pay and that one day, when I think I'm safe and happy, my joy will turn to ash in my mouth. When I pointed out she'd just ripped off a Game of Thrones quote, she kneed me in the balls. FML

#21439786
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26801) - you deserved it (3781)

On 07/10/2015 at 10:42pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was finally going to break down my social barrier by going out on a date with a nice guy I recently met on a dating site. Just at the start of the date, he asked me how old I was, and out of pure nervousness, I blurted out, "12!" I'm 24. FML

#21437546
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23837) - you deserved it (5709)

On 07/06/2015 at 7:02pm - love - by 12yearsoldapparently (woman) - United States (South Carolina)

Today, I gave my girlfriend a hickey barely an inch from her vagina. She texted me later, saying her dad saw it and had grounded her. So yeah, I'm not sure I even want to know what the hell goes on in their house. FML

#21420087
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40679) - you deserved it (3336)

On 06/03/2015 at 3:22am - intimacy - by W T F (man) - United States (Alabama)

Today, I received a beautiful, heart-felt text from my boyfriend detailing all the ways he loved me. He probably should have emphasized just how big his heart is though because he sent the text to three other women too. Thank you, group messaging. FML

#21419508
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31913) - you deserved it (2439)

On 06/02/2015 at 1:03am - love - by Anonymous -

Today, I accidentally hit my husband in the face. Not 2 minutes later, while laying in bed and trying to apologize, I accidentally kneed him in the balls. FML

Today, at my daughter's wedding celebration, I was doing a Michael Jackson act with a few buddies. It went well until I did the crotch-grab. I yanked my balls too hard and fell to the floor, writhing in agony in front of nearly 70 guests. FML

#21417667
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16339) - you deserved it (24933)

On 05/29/2015 at 4:15pm - health - by not a kiddy fiddler really (man) - United States (California)

Today, one of my regulars came up to my car in the parking lot. We talked through the window while I put on my makeup. He then asked for a hug because he won't be in for two weeks. I obliged and he was kind enough to slide his hand between my legs. He then gave me $50 not to tell his wife. FML



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