reras89

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reras89

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 21164
  • Number of comments : 9
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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reras89's page activity

Visits<b>Triplehinge</b> - the 07/09/2015 at 1:04pm<b>littlepiglola</b> - the 05/28/2015 at 9:45am<b>nathanmusgrave</b> - the 05/08/2015 at 1:53am<b>Myra_J_R</b> - the 08/13/2013 at 7:49pm<b>kingabdul</b> - the 06/19/2013 at 10:04am<b></b> - the 03/10/2011 at 1:32am<b>prplr</b> - the 08/21/2009 at 4:31pm<b>mphsgrl</b> - the 05/20/2009 at 9:28pm

reras89's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

reras89's favorite FMLs

Today, I realized what my mom has been calling me for 20 years. She always calls me her "little fehler." With her being from Germany, I always thought it was a cute little nickname. Apparently, she's been calling me her "little mistake." FML

by mistake / 05/11/2009 at 5:09am / United States (Nevada) / Miscellaneous

Today, my family was preparing a turkey for my grandma's birthday dinner when my aunt noticed a utensil on the counter and asked what it was for. My mom said it was used to keep the turkey's legs together. My aunt responded to her by saying, "Maybe you should get one for your daughter." FML

by Familyskank / 05/06/2009 at 12:57pm / United States (Minnesota) / Intimacy

Today, I came home from work and went to open the door. I Iooked in the window and saw a man in my house. Terrified, I called the police. They came, searched the house, and found nothing missing. I went back inside and looked through the window and saw him again. It was my reflection. FML

by Anonymous / 04/29/2009 at 7:12pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was taking the subway to work when I saw a really hot girl. Noticing that she, like me, had a Dunkin' Donuts coffee, I tried to start a conversation by saying, "Is that Double Ds you have there?" She didn't pick up that I was talking about the coffee. FML

by Anonymous / 04/29/2009 at 6:46pm / United States (New York) / Transportation

Today, I woke up to find The Sims 2 running on pause on my laptop. I unpaused to find my character and my boyfriend's were no longer together. Slightly confused, I went on to find the note my boyfriend left. It said, "I hope you can take a hint." I got dumped through a computer game. FML

by Anonymous / 04/12/2009 at 2:11pm / United States (California) / Geek

Today, I saw a dime on the ground. When I bent down to pick it up, my $80 dollar pants ripped. FML

by ripped / 04/11/2009 at 2:10am / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, my girlfriend told me that she had an ultrasound tomorrow morning. With a confused look on my face, she said to me "don't worry, it's not yours." FML

by Crazy09 / 04/08/2009 at 1:43pm / United States (Michigan) / Love

Today, I was volunteering at a school. There's this really bratty boy there and he was being rude, so I joked, "How are you ever gonna get a girlfriend when you're so mean?" He responds, "I think the better question is how are you ever gonna get a boyfriend when you're so ugly." He's 7. FML

by ugly / 04/07/2009 at 7:34pm / United States (New Jersey) / Kids

Today, I went on a date with a guy for the first time. We went to Starbucks and got coffee. We talked for a while, and we were joking and having a good time. Suddenly, he put his hand on my stomach and said, "Soon, this will be plump with my seed." FML

by creepermagnet / 04/06/2009 at 3:39pm / United States (Maryland) / Love

Today, I went on a date with a guy for the first time. We went to Starbucks and got coffee. We talked for a while, and we were joking and having a good time. Suddenly, he put his hand on my stomach and said, "Soon, this will be plump with my seed." FML

by creepermagnet / 04/06/2009 at 3:39pm / United States (Maryland) / Love

Today, I went on a date with a guy for the first time. We went to Starbucks and got coffee. We talked for a while, and we were joking and having a good time. Suddenly, he put his hand on my stomach and said, "Soon, this will be plump with my seed." FML

by creepermagnet / 04/06/2009 at 3:39pm / United States (Maryland) / Love

Today, I went on a date with a guy for the first time. We went to Starbucks and got coffee. We talked for a while, and we were joking and having a good time. Suddenly, he put his hand on my stomach and said, "Soon, this will be plump with my seed." FML

by creepermagnet / 04/06/2009 at 3:39pm / United States (Maryland) / Love

Today, I went to the doctor's office because my wife and I were having some fertilization problems. As I removed my pants, the doctor simply looked at my penis and said "mhm." My wife laughed the whole way home. FML

by manlyman / 04/05/2009 at 9:32am / United States (Virginia) / Health