About relaxedninja : ???
relaxedninja's FML badges
You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.
I like your style
You've liked someone. How cute!
I agree, their lives suck
200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.
relaxedninja's favorite FMLs
Today, a customer said the pants she was buying rang up more than advertised. I quietly told her plus-sizes were not on sale. The customer yelled in front of a whole line of people, "So I'm fat and can't read! Any other insults you'd like to throw at me?" and stormed out of the store. FML
by HereToLaughAtU / 11/17/2014 at 11:16pm / United States (Iowa) / Work
by johnnycomehelpme / 11/13/2014 at 7:59pm / United States (Illinois) / Intimacy
by HoobidibooFox / 11/13/2014 at 5:26pm / United Kingdom (Dudley) / Miscellaneous
Today, my teacher "busted" me for writing down answers on my arm for a test. The so called "answers" was just a duck my little nephew had drawn on my hand the night before. She's actually trying to get me suspended over it. FML
by really / 11/13/2014 at 1:17pm / Canada (Alberta) / Miscellaneous
by spooked / 11/05/2014 at 3:44pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous
Today, my ex sent me a pack of beer to screw with me. I'm still going to AA, and I thought I was almost over it. Five bottles later, I realized I'm not. We didn't break up over my drinking, either; it was because after just 2 weeks of dating, she threatened to kill herself if I didn't marry her. FML
by AAnonymous / 11/05/2014 at 8:57am / United States (Utah) / Health
Today, I found a $20 bill on the ground, so I decided to pick it up. It was actually attached to a string and was meant to be a prank by some kids. They failed miserably, so I took the money. They ran up to me and punched me in the balls for taking their cash. FML
by ethawesome1125 / 11/02/2014 at 7:11pm / United States (Texas) / Money
Today, I was shopping at my workplace, out of uniform, with my husband. A customer recognised me and wanted me to serve him, but I couldn't since we can be fired for doing so while off-duty. He complained to my manager, who wasted no time publicly bitching me out. FML
by iskiel / 10/26/2014 at 1:53am / Australia (Victoria) / Work
Today, I tried to download some network-monitoring software for the office as I suspect that one of my staff has been constantly downloading torrents. It wouldn't download because someone was using all the bandwidth. FML
by Thewatcher / 10/22/2014 at 4:09am / Mauritius / Work
by wthiswrongwithmi / 10/22/2014 at 1:42am / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous
by Awkward / 10/21/2014 at 8:36pm / United States (Maryland) / Geek
Today, after my dad trying every bait, hormone, and poison, the cockroaches in this apartment have gone crazy. They are trying to kill themselves. One tried to commit suicide, by suffocation, in my mouth this morning. FML
by youngboob / 10/21/2014 at 11:42am / United States (Kansas) / Miscellaneous
Today, my annoying colleague gasped, wrapped her arms around herself, started sweating and curled up in a ball crying, "No, no, no" in front of several customers. They accused me of 'setting her off', when I blurted out, "Sorry, she gets panic attacks". All I did was say the word 'abortion'. FML
by Anonymous / 10/20/2014 at 4:31am / United Kingdom / Work
by team hit bella with a car / 10/19/2014 at 10:20pm / United States (Maryland) / Kids
Today, I confronted my girlfriend after catching her cheating on me. After she finished crying, she had the brass balls to say she'd understand if I needed a couple of weeks to forgive her, and asked me for bus fare so she could go tell the other guy they could only be friends now. FML
by yee-whore / 10/18/2014 at 2:44pm / United States (Vermont) / Love
- 1Today, my neighbor's 4-year-old daughter came up to me and asked if she could have my dog. When I… 2Today, after working for Uber for a few weeks I realized that my driver rating was dropping. After… 3Today, I received a phone call, angry at me for not calling my dad on Father's Day. When I told her…