Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

relaxedninja

Offline (56 minutes ago) | Search for a member

relaxedninja

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 29 March 1994 (20 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 3314
  • Number of comments : 34
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About relaxedninja : Red hot chili peppers for life

relaxedninja's page activity

Visits<b>zombi3_queen</b> - the 10/23/2014 at 7:48am<b>jplaya93</b> - the 10/22/2014 at 2:35am<b>allie2590</b> - the 10/21/2014 at 10:40pm<b>Iwtumn</b> - the 10/20/2014 at 10:40pm<b>Marebare23</b> - the 10/16/2014 at 9:36pm<b>Loomunati</b> - the 09/16/2014 at 12:49am<b>weirdly_cute</b> - the 09/15/2014 at 11:31am<b>x_why_me_x</b> - the 09/14/2014 at 9:04pm<b>foxwasalamb</b> - the 09/06/2014 at 2:32pm<b>RadarOReilly</b> - the 09/03/2014 at 7:51pm<b>noah_1234</b> - the 09/02/2014 at 1:19am<b>BlazeArmy</b> - the 09/01/2014 at 11:05pm<b>chinaski7628</b> - the 08/31/2014 at 11:16am<b>LittleBells</b> - the 08/22/2014 at 11:44pm<b>Hopein2025</b> - the 08/14/2014 at 7:02pm<b>Ausdank</b> - the 07/23/2014 at 1:46pm<b>jelly_bennett</b> - the 07/23/2014 at 1:26pm<b>HylianTwilight</b> - the 07/21/2014 at 1:59pm

relaxedninja's FML badges

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

See all of relaxedninja's badges

relaxedninja's favorite FMLs

Today, after my husband's phone buzzed like crazy all morning, I decided to pick it up and see what all the fuss was about. He had three new picture messages from his "boss", naked and strapped to a chair with the caption, "Are you still coming over tonight?" We've been married for nine years and have two children. FML

#12838933
212 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58711) - you deserved it (4137)

On 08/31/2010 at 2:07pm - intimacy - by ashlee (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I heard two of my students having a conversation. One asked what state Arizona was in, and the other replied Canada. I teach sixth grade social studies and they weren't joking. FML

#12837057
289 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32021) - you deserved it (7734)

On 08/31/2010 at 10:50am - kids - by teacher (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I Googled my father, who I haven't seen in 3 years. The first website link was his obituary. When I confronted my mom about it, she said, "Oh, didn't I tell you?" and walked off. FML

#12834464
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43614) - you deserved it (2454)

On 08/31/2010 at 3:54am - misc - by missyoudad. (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I went with my family to go see a notoriously creepy abandoned house. We noticed the people had left a lot of stuff behind so we loaded up the car with books, records, etc. As we were leaving, we saw the family who lived there drive up. I robbed a house with my grandma. FML

#12826740
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9978) - you deserved it (43960)

On 08/30/2010 at 8:04pm - misc - by tikizombie (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my external hard drive broke. My husband tried to fix it, and the computer told him he needed to format it. Apparently he didn't know what formatting does, so he did it. I'm a wedding photographer and had a full summer of unfinished wedding photography on there. FML

#12822574
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34226) - you deserved it (6615)

On 08/30/2010 at 2:42pm - work - by photogirl (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I witnessed my girlfriend scratch her crotch and then sniff her fingers. FML

#12817288
244 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39442) - you deserved it (12402)

On 08/30/2010 at 3:30am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend told everyone I queef during sex. Even his parents are calling me "Cooter Pooter." FML

#12816242
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34108) - you deserved it (6289)

On 08/30/2010 at 2:02am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, after nearly 2 years of continuous fighting in Afghanistan, my unit came home. We were booed at the airport. FML

#12810587
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (122323) - you deserved it (12025)

On 08/29/2010 at 8:39pm - misc - by soldierboy - United States

Today, my grandmother died. No one called me to let me know she passed. I found out because people kept writing RIP on her Facebook wall. My siblings and I weren't even mentioned in her obituary with the other grandchildren, but they did remember to mention her dog. FML

#12802001
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30800) - you deserved it (2143)

On 08/29/2010 at 7:29am - animals - by katta2009 (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, it was really hot in my house so I pulled my shorts down so I was just in my boxers. My family and I were watching tv and I got a spontaneous erection. When I discreetly tried to pull my shorts back up, my penis flipped out of my boxers. FML

#12792346
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34550) - you deserved it (22865)

On 08/28/2010 at 7:52pm - intimacy - by Sicko - Sent from mobile version

Today, I found out that my entire school differentiates me from another girl in my grade with the same name by saying "No, she's the lesbian one." I'm straight. FML

#12792184
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25208) - you deserved it (2669)

On 08/28/2010 at 7:40pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, while trying to give an immunization to a "special" 13-year-old, I got spit on, kicked, almost bitten, and had a chair thrown at me. When it was all over, I flinched when the patient tried to hug me. Her mom called me a "b*tch" and I later found out she wasn't a "special" child. FML

#12767492
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33047) - you deserved it (3283)

On 08/27/2010 at 2:49am - work - by atetoeate (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was driving home with my dad after buying a new truck. We were on the freeway and the engine wasn't revving up very much. My dad thought that something was wrong with my transmission, so he reached over to change gears. Most cars won't go into reverse at high speeds. Mine does. FML

#12706799
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25425) - you deserved it (2630)

On 08/23/2010 at 7:28pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I wanted to punish a student for being late. I decided to start a pop quiz before he arrived. I was positive there wasn't enough time for him to finish. He scored full marks and I couldn't say a word. FML

#12693453
306 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8176) - you deserved it (68095)

On 08/23/2010 at 12:18am - kids - by K_M (man) - Malaysia (Selangor)

Today, my Mom felt the need to walk around school and tell everyone to be nice to me because I just started my period. FML

#12616520
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56031) - you deserved it (3682)

On 08/19/2010 at 12:12am - intimacy - by Jordid - United States (Colorado)



FML's blog

  • Krumla's Illustrated FML
  • It's Friday, so a bold font is required. I was sitting in my caravan by the side of busy road cooking cocktail sausages over a gas stove when I realised it was time to start writing something about this…

Friday 24 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: