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relaxedninja

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relaxedninja

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2770
  • Number of comments : 29
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About relaxedninja : Red hot chili peppers for life

relaxedninja's page activity

Visits<b>Ausdank</b> - yesterday at 1:46pm<b>jelly_bennett</b> - yesterday at 1:26pm<b>HylianTwilight</b> - the 07/21/2014 at 1:59pm<b>TrackGirl19</b> - the 07/07/2014 at 4:40pm<b>laurenboo1023</b> - the 06/19/2014 at 3:28pm<b>CountEjacula</b> - the 06/11/2014 at 3:13pm<b>tuckit</b> - the 05/31/2014 at 1:22am<b>x_why_me_x</b> - the 05/30/2014 at 11:44pm<b>Victormoon</b> - the 04/09/2014 at 8:58am<b>pumboc</b> - the 04/03/2014 at 6:37am<b>bellesuore</b> - the 03/30/2014 at 4:06pm<b>ElizabethJackson</b> - the 02/24/2014 at 7:56pm<b>mcm_3</b> - the 01/19/2014 at 4:02pm<b>kemosabe4201</b> - the 12/23/2013 at 10:00am<b>tea_brewer</b> - the 12/14/2013 at 2:47pm<b>alexmac222</b> - the 12/09/2013 at 5:29am<b>Rule27</b> - the 11/24/2013 at 1:11pm<b>emirie</b> - the 11/16/2013 at 6:25pm

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relaxedninja's favorite FMLs

Today, I bumped into a lady in the New Jersey airport. After I politely apologized she said, "Watch your step, asshole." FML

#12984210
266 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24392) - you deserved it (4791)

On 09/09/2010 at 11:15pm - misc - by higagram (man) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, my cousin came to visit from America. While out shopping, she said loudly that she was having trouble finding clothes to fit around her huge fanny, causing a lot of people to stare in our direction. I had to explain to her that "fanny" in the UK means "vagina." FML

#12975254
270 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34131) - you deserved it (3902)

On 09/09/2010 at 10:00am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I found out that I'm a dad. My ex from 8 years ago contacted me through facebook. I'm happy I have a kid, but apparently she only contacted me because she wants me to start paying child support, now her boyfriend who provided for them left. FML

#12938106
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27841) - you deserved it (5401)

On 09/06/2010 at 7:21pm - kids - by newdad (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was at work and was confronted by a customer wanting to get a "Nemo" fish. I explained that 'Nemo' needs to live in saltwater, not freshwater, like their tank was. The customer then turns around and grabs a perforated tank divider and says, "Can't I just split them up with this?" FML

#12924795
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21096) - you deserved it (2847)

On 09/05/2010 at 11:01pm - work - by christiner - Sent from mobile version

Today, I decided to drive my mothers Bentley. She is out of town and told me not to go near the car. Being 17, I didn't listen. As I was backing out the driveway, I was hit by an SUV, seriously damaging my moms car. Who was driving the SUV? My mom, coming home early. FML

#12878777
246 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9872) - you deserved it (69980)

On 09/03/2010 at 12:13am - misc - by ohseven6421 - United States (California)

Today, I'm recovering from abdominal surgery. In addition to pain, I'm having trouble peeing and haven't pooped since Sunday, so my surgeon prescribed a laxative. Turns out I'm allergic to it. Now I'm covered in hives, even in my ears, incisions, and lady parts. I also still haven't pooped. FML

#12866112
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35187) - you deserved it (2371)

On 09/02/2010 at 3:25am - health - by coyote - Japan

Today, my roommate woke me up during afternoon nap to tell me that I need to move out. His reason: "Our political differences will likely escalate to violence." FML

#12842541
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23375) - you deserved it (2816)

On 08/31/2010 at 7:13pm - misc - by NowHomeless (man) - United States (Kansas)

Today, after my husband's phone buzzed like crazy all morning, I decided to pick it up and see what all the fuss was about. He had three new picture messages from his "boss", naked and strapped to a chair with the caption, "Are you still coming over tonight?" We've been married for nine years and have two children. FML

#12838933
211 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57759) - you deserved it (4054)

On 08/31/2010 at 2:07pm - intimacy - by ashlee (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I heard two of my students having a conversation. One asked what state Arizona was in, and the other replied Canada. I teach sixth grade social studies and they weren't joking. FML

#12837057
290 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31898) - you deserved it (7728)

On 08/31/2010 at 10:50am - kids - by teacher (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I Googled my father, who I haven't seen in 3 years. The first website link was his obituary. When I confronted my mom about it, she said, "Oh, didn't I tell you?" and walked off. FML

#12834464
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42879) - you deserved it (2416)

On 08/31/2010 at 3:54am - misc - by missyoudad. (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I went with my family to go see a notoriously creepy abandoned house. We noticed the people had left a lot of stuff behind so we loaded up the car with books, records, etc. As we were leaving, we saw the family who lived there drive up. I robbed a house with my grandma. FML

#12826740
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9936) - you deserved it (43801)

On 08/30/2010 at 8:04pm - misc - by tikizombie (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my external hard drive broke. My husband tried to fix it, and the computer told him he needed to format it. Apparently he didn't know what formatting does, so he did it. I'm a wedding photographer and had a full summer of unfinished wedding photography on there. FML

#12822574
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34085) - you deserved it (6605)

On 08/30/2010 at 2:42pm - work - by photogirl (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I witnessed my girlfriend scratch her crotch and then sniff her fingers. FML

#12817288
244 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39349) - you deserved it (12387)

On 08/30/2010 at 3:30am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend told everyone I queef during sex. Even his parents are calling me "Cooter Pooter." FML

#12816242
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33890) - you deserved it (6262)

On 08/30/2010 at 2:02am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, after nearly 2 years of continuous fighting in Afghanistan, my unit came home. We were booed at the airport. FML

#12810587
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (119548) - you deserved it (11806)

On 08/29/2010 at 8:39pm - misc - by soldierboy - United States



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