relaxedninja

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Offline (the 02/08/2016 at 8:59pm)

relaxedninja

3Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 29 March 1994 (22 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 8159
  • Number of comments : 37
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About relaxedninja : ???

relaxedninja's page activity

Visits<b>autiger0612</b> - the 05/28/2016 at 9:53pm<b>MzZombicidal</b> - the 12/21/2015 at 6:08am<b>doubled01</b> - the 12/10/2015 at 12:55am<b>paskievitchjack</b> - the 11/24/2015 at 7:13pm<b>GAeroNKissR</b> - the 09/02/2015 at 3:07am<b>vicky_lynnnnn</b> - the 08/29/2015 at 10:24pm<b>fabs1171</b> - the 07/16/2015 at 12:36am<b>starlinks898</b> - the 04/27/2015 at 10:07pm<b>Acerhawk</b> - the 03/05/2015 at 11:18pm<b>Larissa24</b> - the 02/28/2015 at 4:10am<b>hallieee</b> - the 02/20/2015 at 4:32am<b>angelofmusic1895</b> - the 02/18/2015 at 11:53am<b>jillytc</b> - the 01/27/2015 at 5:33am<b>xxxbooxxx</b> - the 01/20/2015 at 12:42am<b>PePziNL</b> - the 01/12/2015 at 5:58pm<b>patrickalamo</b> - the 01/12/2015 at 9:06am<b>Darkness_Hate</b> - the 01/12/2015 at 8:54am<b>foxwasalamb</b> - the 01/11/2015 at 6:10am

Fucked!<b>angelofmusic1895</b> - the 01/24/2015 at 2:29pm<b>xxxbooxxx</b> - the 01/20/2015 at 6:42am<b>patrickalamo</b> - the 01/12/2015 at 3:06pm

relaxedninja's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

See all of relaxedninja's badges

relaxedninja's favorite FMLs

Today, my professor ran half a mile in the pouring rain just to return my cell phone, which I had left behind in lecture. Shocked and embarrassed, I exclaimed, "You shouldn't have!" "Damn right," he responded, "I'm 64 years old." FML

by sad but true. / 04/15/2014 at 7:18pm / United States (Connecticut) / Work

Today, I was taking the biggest shit of my life. When I worked the thing out, it hit the water with such force that I got a toilet water enema from the backwash. I was so freaked out that I screamed and fell off the seat, prompting my husband to rush in to see what was wrong. FML

by traumatized / 04/12/2014 at 2:07pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had to tell my ex that I'm pregnant with his baby. I sent him a casual "Hey :)" text to try to ease into things. He replied, "WHO THE FUCK IS THIS?" and ended up threatening to make my life hell if I don't tell my new boyfriend that the child is his. FML

by =( / 04/05/2014 at 1:48pm / United States (Texas) / Work

Today, while in line at my local bakery, an old man passed wind in front of me. The smell was like nothing I've ever experienced before. I managed to withstand it, but the child behind me could not, and spewed orange vomit all over my back. FML

by Anonymous / 04/05/2014 at 12:04am / United States (New Mexico) / Kids

Today, I resorted to the oldest prank in the book: laxatives in the food. Except it wasn't for a prank, but just a desperate attempt to get my clingy boyfriend to leave me the hell alone. I think I'm going to hell. FML

by someone / 04/01/2014 at 3:21pm / United States (West Virginia) / Love

Today, while working at Dairy Queen, a customer asked me what was so special about our ice cream cakes, and how they're different from regular cakes. I chuckled, and told her it's because they're made from ice cream. She threw a fit, which resulted in me being written up and sent home early. FML

by Coryj1220 / 03/25/2014 at 11:53pm / United States (Kentucky) / Work

Today, during my dinner break, I was forced to listen to a coworker talk about how he dumped his needy ex for another woman. I'm the ex. We kept our relationship secret from our coworkers. I guess now I know why he dumped me. FML

by Anonymous / 03/24/2014 at 2:56am / United States / Love

Today, my boyfriend told me he doesn't know what it's like to be turned on. Apparently, I've been doing something wrong for the past two years. FML

by BustedEgo / 03/23/2014 at 1:31am / United States (Maine) / Intimacy

Today, at a family gathering, it emerged that my now ex-fiancé has been sleeping with his brother's girlfriend for some time now. A fight broke out, the police were called, and more than one of his relatives are blaming me for him cheating with her. FML

by Anonymous / 03/22/2014 at 1:31pm / United States (California) / Love

Today, I had to give a deposition ahead of a trial in which my former boss is accused of fraud. I'm not a smart man, and I smoked a joint before heading out to try to calm my nerves. I got way too high and ended up giggling like an idiot through half the deposition. FML

by screwed / 03/20/2014 at 5:03pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out why my dad always treated me badly as a kid compared to my siblings. It's because I was conceived while my mom was cheating on him. On top of that, he made it clear that he still doesn't consider me a "real" part of the family. FML

by Anonymous / 03/20/2014 at 4:23pm / United States (Illinois) / Kids

Today, I found out that my unemployed husband has his own web-comic, that he makes money off it, and that it mainly involves the main character's airhead, money-grubbing wife ruining his life. She looks strikingly like me and shares my name. FML

by cumbucket cops / 03/16/2014 at 1:53pm / United States (Ohio) / Love

Today, I went shopping for a wedding dress at a fancy store. The proprietor took one look at me, said they don't have any dresses large enough for me, and asked me to leave. No wonder my self-confidence is in the gutter. FML

by DarthVerona / 03/14/2014 at 4:07pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Love

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I found out that my 15-year-old son is a prolific creator of My Little Pony themed hentai. I'm not a judgmental man, but he's probably going to hell. FML

by ashamed father / 03/09/2014 at 6:32pm / Canada (Ontario) / Kids

Today, my fiancé and I told my future mother-in-law that we are expecting. Her response was, "Why are you doing this to me?" FML

by dyingangel246 / 03/05/2014 at 5:15am / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous