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relaxedninja

Offline (the 07/24/2014 at 4:17am) | Search for a member

relaxedninja

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2790
  • Number of comments : 29
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About relaxedninja : Red hot chili peppers for life

relaxedninja's page activity

Visits<b>Ausdank</b> - the 07/23/2014 at 1:46pm<b>jelly_bennett</b> - the 07/23/2014 at 1:26pm<b>HylianTwilight</b> - the 07/21/2014 at 1:59pm<b>TrackGirl19</b> - the 07/07/2014 at 4:40pm<b>laurenboo1023</b> - the 06/19/2014 at 3:28pm<b>CountEjacula</b> - the 06/11/2014 at 3:13pm<b>tuckit</b> - the 05/31/2014 at 1:22am<b>x_why_me_x</b> - the 05/30/2014 at 11:44pm<b>Victormoon</b> - the 04/09/2014 at 8:58am<b>pumboc</b> - the 04/03/2014 at 6:37am<b>bellesuore</b> - the 03/30/2014 at 4:06pm<b>ElizabethJackson</b> - the 02/24/2014 at 7:56pm<b>mcm_3</b> - the 01/19/2014 at 4:02pm<b>kemosabe4201</b> - the 12/23/2013 at 10:00am<b>tea_brewer</b> - the 12/14/2013 at 2:47pm<b>alexmac222</b> - the 12/09/2013 at 5:29am<b>Rule27</b> - the 11/24/2013 at 1:11pm<b>emirie</b> - the 11/16/2013 at 6:25pm

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relaxedninja's favorite FMLs

Today, I had to get an MRI. I double and triple checked to make sure there was no out-of-pocket cost. When I arrived at the testing center, I was expected to pay full price for the test. It costs $2,360. FML

#20770351
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44204) - you deserved it (3511)

On 07/08/2013 at 10:48am - health - by insurance lies - United States

Today, I actually had to teach my 9-year-old brother how to pour himself a glass of milk, after he burst out in tears when my sister told him to do it himself. His astonishing ignorance also extends to basic hygiene. FML

#20763424
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36928) - you deserved it (4371)

On 07/04/2013 at 12:27pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - Germany (Nordrhein-Westfalen)

Today, I saw my older sister for the first time in three years. We hadn't spoke since I found out that she was the woman my college boyfriend left me for. Unfortunately, our reunion was fueled by her two-year-old son's desire to meet his dad. My husband. FML

#20760666
247 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64581) - you deserved it (5182)

On 07/02/2013 at 10:39pm - love - by Jenn (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was explaining to my son that porn isn't a realistic depiction of sex. Just as I finished explaining to him that threesomes rarely happen in real life, he started crying. I feel like a dream-crushing monster. FML

#20756438
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47271) - you deserved it (9220)

On 06/30/2013 at 5:44pm - kids - by sorry, kiddo (man) - Belgium (Brussels Hoofdstedelijk Gewest)

Today, my girlfriend kicked me out for bringing up the idea of her maybe giving me a blowjob someday. According to her, it's "demeaning" and "sick". She doesn't seem to have a problem always making me go down on her for ages as a condition for having sex with me, though. FML

#20754518
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55811) - you deserved it (9003)

On 06/29/2013 at 3:58pm - intimacy - by patriarchal apparently (man) - Saint Lucia

Today, I went out on a date with a girl. Everything was going well until I shared how my family was affected by the 2010 earthquake in Haiti. She immediately got up and left, calling me a liar. Apparently, I'm "too cute" to be of Haitian descent. What the hell? FML

Today, while life-guarding in a 55+ community, I greeted a man by saying: "Good morning Sir!" He responded with, "Cut the shit kid, I'm not that fucking old." FML

#20746882
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38689) - you deserved it (5427)

On 06/25/2013 at 5:45pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (New Jersey)

Today, after years of battling my social anxiety issues, I went out clubbing with my friends. A girl started talking to me and we actually hit it off. The next thing I know, I'm on the floor getting wailed on by some bloke for hitting on his girlfriend. She didn't do a thing to stop him. FML

#20738899
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45318) - you deserved it (3237)

On 06/21/2013 at 12:10pm - misc - by lehonj49 (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I turned 29. To celebrate, my office got me a cake that read "Happy 38th!!" The "theme" of the "party" was 'Not a day over 35!' I waited all day for someone to tell me it was all a prank, but nobody did. I spent my lunch hour crying in my car. Happy birthday to me. FML

#20732995
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53511) - you deserved it (5143)

On 06/18/2013 at 9:06am - work - by Not a day over 35 (woman) - United States (Alaska)

Today, I found out I'm going to be a grandfather. I'm 29, my son is 13 and the girl in question is 16. FML

#20731946
436 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59069) - you deserved it (36940)

On 06/17/2013 at 6:49pm - kids - by young grandpa - United States (Georgia)

Today, I witnessed a large woman pee on a pregnancy test in the middle of a Walmart parking lot, clean herself off, then wander around with the test hanging out of her mouth, waiting for her result. Where in the name of Christ do these people come from? FML

#20701323
206 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67950) - you deserved it (4144)

On 06/02/2013 at 2:10pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I asked my dermatologist why my acne has been getting worse, despite following her directions and spending hundreds of dollars on medicine. She just shrugged and told me they can't actually cure my acne. However, they can prescribe me a bunch of stuff and hope one works. FML

#20700784
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47050) - you deserved it (5036)

On 06/02/2013 at 6:53am - health - by WtfDidIPayYouForThen - United States (Florida)

Today, I went to the pharmacy to buy condoms. My card was declined, and I had to stand and watch in morbid fascination as the man behind me kindly paid for my purchase. His reason was "God forbid a maxed out Visa should get in the way of fucking." FML

#20698637
33 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65438) - you deserved it (18674)

On 06/01/2013 at 1:09am - intimacy - by Samprib (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I was torn from my car and slammed against the hood because a canister of window-cleaning wipes I keep in my glove compartment apparently looks vaguely like a pipe-bomb. My lawyer agreed with the cops, and won't handle the "excessive force" case I threatened the police with. FML

#20683298
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41304) - you deserved it (3931)

On 05/24/2013 at 3:42am - misc - by JDziewaltowski (man) - United States

Today, my wife gave birth to a beautiful baby girl. She's perfect in every way, except for her birth mark. It's under the corner of her left eye and looks almost exactly like a prison teardrop tattoo. FML

#20673142
196 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49798) - you deserved it (6991)

On 05/19/2013 at 2:33pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Alberta)



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