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reisenstar

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reisenstar

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  • Number of visits : 69
  • Number of comments : 1
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

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reisenstar's favorite FMLs

Today, I was at Basic Training for the Army when I got a package in the mail from my friends back home. You are required to open your packages in front of your drill sergeants and peers at Basic. When I opened it, it was a dildo. FML

#20818422
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60778) - you deserved it (5967)

On 08/03/2013 at 9:01am - misc - by zackeryburch - United States (California)

Today, it's my wedding day, and I have uncontrollable diarrhea. FML

#16169290
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61357) - you deserved it (4689)

On 05/14/2011 at 9:17am - love - by Anonymous - United Kingdom

Today, my boyfriend tried to cure me of my snake phobia by buying one. When he took it out of the cage, it bit him. Now he's terrified of them too. Even worse, he dropped the snake, so it's now loose in our house. FML

#15531816
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42002) - you deserved it (6209)

On 03/28/2011 at 2:52pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Macedonia (Struga)

Today, I woke up to the sound of something hitting my bedroom wall outside. I could see my boyfriend's car from the window, so I assumed he was throwing pebbles to get my attention. I opened the window and an egg flew in. FML

#12334869
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29085) - you deserved it (4036)

On 08/05/2010 at 4:30pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I found out that my neighbor gets more pleasure out of me and my husband having it off then I do. FML

#8382778
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15553) - you deserved it (2185)

On 02/17/2010 at 7:30pm - intimacy - by noosher0990 -

Today, while on the phone with a client at work, I was planning on saying either "Yeah." or "Uh-huh." Without thinking, I combined the two and ended up saying "Yee-hah," like a cowboy. FML

#6550671
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11696) - you deserved it (29696)

On 12/01/2009 at 12:25pm - work - by Jen (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my dad and mom and I were going out to eat dinner. My dad wanted a romantic dinner just with my mom so he told me to make an excuse not to go. I did, which ended up as a huge fight, grounded and phone taken away. My dad just stood there in the background putting thumbs up. FML

#6512953
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36897) - you deserved it (3199)

On 11/29/2009 at 1:10pm - misc - by Yoooooo0 (woman) - United States

Today, I found out that my sister who is 16 years older than me is actually my biological mother. She and my parents decided it was best that I didn't know who my real mother was, and to be raised by my grandparents as their child. I've always hated my sister. FML

#5701860
315 comments

I agree, your life sucks (164762) - you deserved it (8195)

On 10/07/2009 at 12:07pm - misc - by dinosaurman (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my 5 year old nephew showed me green martians he'd made with his new Play Doh set. I smiled and said, "Wow! Now, how about some blue martians!" He looked at me and replied, "How about some blue shut the fuck up?!" FML

#56665
505 comments

I agree, your life sucks (234614) - you deserved it (81891)

On 02/16/2009 at 9:29pm - kids - by offbeans (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was in a car accident. After screaming at the woman for running into me, I got in my car and drove off. As I was driving away, I was staring her down when I ended up rear ending the person in front of me. FML

#19361
26 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6244) - you deserved it (48329)

On 02/09/2009 at 11:54pm - misc - by prettyinpurple - United States (Virginia)

Today, I made fun of my friend when she tripped over the curb. I said, loudly, "Haha, you can't even walk." I then notice the man in the wheelchair a few feet ahead of us. FML

#2244
30 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7400) - you deserved it (26163)

On 01/22/2009 at 6:22pm - misc - by william - United States (Arizona)



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