Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

redxapplexoxo

Search for a member

redxapplexoxo
  • Town/Country : Roanoke, US
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 24 June 1992 (21 years)
  • Number of visits : 730
  • Number of comments : 54
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 7 posted

About redxapplexoxo : They tried to put me in rehab to but that shit didn't work.

redxapplexoxo's last visitors

Tbearshyaa1717StiffPvtPartstrue_man69iSoniaKatlynBrooke_Willa_HieroglyphsybyabrahamIHATEFMYLIFE

redxapplexoxo's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

redxapplexoxo's favorite FMLs

Today, I awoke to my husband donning a gorilla mask in the middle of the night. My kids have been staying in a tent out back for the past few nights, and have complained of a "monster" scaring them. I told them that it was their imagination. My husband says he gets a kick out of it. FML

#3837360
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42732) - you deserved it (6137)

On 07/17/2009 at 6:02pm - kids - by Divorcemenow (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, my friend thought it would be funny to put a pretzel on my forehead while I was sleeping on the beach. I now have a pretzel-shaped tan line in the middle of my head. FML

#3816010
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40157) - you deserved it (8434)

On 07/16/2009 at 10:28pm - misc - by joe1234 (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my friend and I decided to get bikini waxes. Afterwards, the women who did the waxing told my friend it was $30 for her wax. Then, in front of the whole salon, the women points at me and says, "You! You so hairy- $35!". FML

#3669971
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53110) - you deserved it (8191)

On 07/11/2009 at 4:11pm - health - by waxinghorror (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was talking to my mom. During the conversation she asked me, "Does he take his leg off when you guys are having sex?" Referring to the guy I've been seeing who has a prosthetic leg. My dad then asked, "Does he beat you with it too if you've been naughty?" FML

#209116
315 comments

I agree, your life sucks (218778) - you deserved it (28161)

On 03/04/2009 at 6:07pm - intimacy - by Girl123999 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I sneezed so hard I herniated my back. After passing out from the pain I awoke on the floor covered in my own shit and piss. Unable to move, I had to wait in this state for four hours for my wife to return home from work, clean me up and take me to the hospital. FML

#2729
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42666) - you deserved it (2041)

On 01/26/2009 at 7:02pm - health - by Noname - Japan (Fukuoka)

Today, whilst brushing my teeth, I fell asleep poking myself in the eye with my toothbrush. FML

#258
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19664) - you deserved it (11050)

On 11/09/2008 at 4:18am - health - by Noname - Sent from mobile version

Today, I told a friend that he looked smarter with his glasses on. He took them off and said "oh, and now you look more handsome". FML

#141
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12203) - you deserved it (34656)

On 10/29/2008 at 7:08am - misc - by loser - United Kingdom (Cambridgeshire)



FML's blog

  • Zoé's Illustrated FML
  • Hey there, young whippersnappers. Yes, you, the youth. I’m talking to you, sitting at home, scratching your asses. Why aren’t you doing something more constructive with your lives? Stop watching that shit…

Friday 18 April 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: