redblueflame

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Offline (the 06/19/2016 at 5:02am)

redblueflame

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 2 July 1992 (24 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 8051
  • Number of comments : 14
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About redblueflame : Just a girl who enjoys funny things. What else do you need to know ? :)

redblueflame's page activity

Visits<b>Whiplash169</b> - the 07/02/2016 at 10:24am<b>Xxbeardsley</b> - the 07/02/2016 at 1:28am<b>10nachoman10</b> - the 08/10/2015 at 9:14pm<b>Kruitdamp</b> - the 07/21/2015 at 6:17am<b>draftskink</b> - the 07/02/2015 at 1:40am<b>Markovski</b> - the 06/21/2015 at 2:01am<b>Scarface408</b> - the 06/18/2015 at 2:01pm<b>ricardof</b> - the 01/29/2015 at 9:57am<b>marko1596</b> - the 01/27/2015 at 7:00pm<b>hellopenny</b> - the 01/22/2015 at 2:23pm<b>kiante99</b> - the 01/02/2015 at 5:19pm<b>Nathan23xx</b> - the 12/23/2014 at 12:27am<b>maxyutd</b> - the 12/04/2014 at 2:22am<b>Epiccake</b> - the 11/19/2014 at 7:06pm<b>jeffandjeff</b> - the 10/02/2014 at 11:02pm<b>TheMrJoee</b> - the 08/11/2014 at 12:54pm<b>GripItRight</b> - the 07/30/2014 at 11:12pm<b>cokeman666</b> - the 07/10/2014 at 7:03am

Fucked!<b>Nathan23xx</b> - the 12/23/2014 at 6:27am

redblueflame's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of redblueflame's badges

redblueflame's favorite FMLs

Today, my 11 month-old son started viciously biting whatever part of my anatomy he can sink his teeth into. He thinks it is hysterical to latch on while I scream helplessly in pain for him to let go. FML

by Anonymous / 01/01/2014 at 12:38am / United States (New York) / Kids

Today, instead of spending New Year's Eve having a romantic night out with my fiancé as we'd planned, I'm spending it sitting beside him in the hospital because his friends convinced him to go off-road ghost-riding in the dead of night. FML

by Anonymous / 12/31/2013 at 6:38pm / Love

Today, my 12-year-old daughter glued her left eyelid shut with fake eyelash glue. After spending 4 hours in the ER, I asked her why she did it. "I wanted to get Blake to notice me," she said. Blake is our neighbor's convict son. FML

by AnnoyedSister / 12/30/2013 at 5:28pm / United States (Virginia) / Kids

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my strict Christian mother walked into my room just after I'd finished masturbating. Although dressed, I was still holding the used tissue, which she noticed. Having to think fast to disguise my deed and avoid an entire sermon, I had no option but to blow my nose with the spunky tissue. FML

by Jizzyface / 12/29/2013 at 7:36am / United Kingdom (Cheshire) / Intimacy

Today, I took an extra xanax to help with my anxiety, then went to sleep. I guess it was probably too much, because I woke up a few hours later, freaking out and panicking because I was convinced I was a bee trapped in a human body. FML

by beemove / 12/28/2013 at 4:19pm / United States (Washington) / Health

Today, my dog has found a new game he likes. It involves him rolling around on my new bed sheets to build up static electricity and run and poke me with his nose so I get shocked. FML

by honeybunny90 / 12/28/2013 at 3:23am / United States (Texas) / Animals

Today, my boyfriend of five years got me a ring for Christmas. When I opened it, I was speechless and overjoyed. He then said, "It's just a ring. It doesn't mean anything." FML

by Wtfbro / 12/24/2013 at 3:30pm / United States / Love

Today, like every day since I was born, my name is Yarenis, pronounced "ja-ra-nees. For some reason, everybody pronounce it "your anus". FML

by yarenis / 12/24/2013 at 5:45am / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had sex with my boyfriend for the first time, after he repeatedly told me not to worry about bleeding, and reassuring me that he'd take care of me. He passed out halfway through. FML

by JoshuasGirl / 12/23/2013 at 2:13pm / United States (Michigan) / Intimacy

Today, I went to a nativity play. My husband showed up late and drunk, and I had to explain to him why booming "Yeah! Time to get baby Jesus up in this shit!" when our son was about to go on stage got us kicked out. FML

by bastard / 12/22/2013 at 4:28pm / United States / Kids

Today, I woke up to a loud crashing in the middle of the night. I went to investigate, but found nothing amiss. Nothing except an axe firmly wedged in my front door, that is. It's safe to say that I have no clue who did it, and that I needed a fresh pair of underwear. FML

by nopissleft / 12/20/2013 at 4:05pm / Sweden (Stockholms Lan) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was woken up to the sound of my cat peeing on the pillow next to mine. When I yelled at him, he jumped over my face and off the bed. He was still peeing the entire time. FML

by Cat Piss / 12/15/2013 at 11:58am / United States (Texas) / Animals

Today, for my 18th birthday my mum gave me a black lace thong. I'm a guy. FML

by Anonymous / 12/14/2013 at 7:48pm / Canada / Miscellaneous

Today, my dog played dead just so I would leave him alone. FML

by Crystal_Nicole / 12/14/2013 at 12:05am / United States (Kansas) / Animals

Today, my cousin started sending sarcastic love messages to me. I replied, with even cheesier lines. Then she rang me saying she was so glad I felt the same way. Turns out she wasn't being sarcastic. FML

by wth? / 12/13/2013 at 10:10am / United Kingdom (Rotherham) / Love