Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

reapr03

Offline (15 minutes ago) | Search for a member

reapr03

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 4451
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

reapr03's page activity

Visits<b>Welshite</b> - the 04/21/2014 at 8:08am

reapr03's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

See all of reapr03's badges

reapr03's favorite FMLs

Today, I let my 9-year-old daughter use my tablet while I made her dinner. A few minutes later, she let out a blood-curdling scream. Turned out she'd searched for My Little Pony pictures and stumbled upon a drawing of Rainbow Dash giving another pony a blowjob. FML

#21463707
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12797) - you deserved it (1960)

On 09/02/2015 at 11:26am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, I've been calling my girlfriend by her nickname for so long, I had to reactivate my Facebook account to find her real name. FML

#21463691
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5966) - you deserved it (11677)

On 09/02/2015 at 9:56am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - India (Tamil Nadu)

Today, I was diagnosed with depression. My girlfriend's idea of consoling me was to break up with me because she can't date a "psycho". FML

#21463683
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12362) - you deserved it (912)

On 09/02/2015 at 9:29am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom

Today, my doctor informed me that the tests we've been doing the previous months show no sign of leukemia. I was just about to express my relief when he casually followed up with, "Never mind, there's still a lot of other blood-related diseases we need to look out for." FML

#21463645
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14970) - you deserved it (877)

On 09/02/2015 at 6:09am - health - by Lily (woman) - Austria (Wien)

Today, some friends got upset with me as I wouldn't leave work early and cycle 12 miles to meet them to fix their punctures because they had no spare tubes or repair kits. The same friends that always mock me for being so prepared on bike rides. FML

#21463642
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15386) - you deserved it (1022)

On 09/02/2015 at 5:20am - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (West Sussex)

Today, I had an argument with my boyfriend who was accusing me of only being in a relationship with him because I'd fantasised about being with an Asian. When I told him he was wrong, he asked me what attracted me to him in the first place. "Your eyes" was definitely the wrong answer. FML

#21463628
0 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17325) - you deserved it (4486) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 09/02/2015 at 12:21am - love - by Anonyme - Sent from mobile version

Today, I went to the orthodontist, and found out when I was supposed to get my braces off. His exact words, "You'll get them off around Christmas... but we're not sure what year." FML

#21463569
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16428) - you deserved it (1116)

On 09/01/2015 at 11:55pm - health - by KenzoBVB - Canada

Today, at my new job, I walked into the office to hear my supervisor and HR manager talking about how, "the new guy isn't very smart, but we can get him to do the shit work for a couple weeks." Gee, thanks. FML

#21463530
32 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15561) - you deserved it (1234)

On 09/01/2015 at 10:39pm - work - by texasbest (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, a customer service guy called to fix a problem I've been having with my phone. When it transpired that he couldn't help, he transferred me to another representative. This other representative ended up being a John Deere dealer in Michigan. FML

#21463522
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14647) - you deserved it (984)

On 09/01/2015 at 10:26pm - misc - by NotBuyingATractor (man) - United States (California)

Today, I got a notice from the housing association, if I don't water my lawn I will be charged a $150 fine. Yet if I do water my lawn the city with charge me a $150 fine because of the drought. FML

#21463419
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17768) - you deserved it (995)

On 09/01/2015 at 3:43pm - misc - by really? - United States

Today, my parents made me quit a school team that I absolutely loved, because women "aren't supposed to play sports." and were worried that if I stayed on the team, I'd develop a manly physique. FML

#21463369
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22344) - you deserved it (1420)

On 09/01/2015 at 1:02pm - misc - by Anonymous -

Today, my boss told me that the company will be hiring a programmer for our department. I had the idea for the position when we went over my 3-year career path last month, but it wasn't approved. I now get to look over résumés from other people applying for my dream job. FML

#21463347
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17739) - you deserved it (1088)

On 09/01/2015 at 11:30am - work - by Not a programmer yet (man) - United States (California)

Today, at soccer, I repeatedly asked my coach for water as I was feeling light headed. His response every time was, "5 more minutes". Eventually, I got so dehydrated that I passed out. The first thing my coach said when I woke up was, "Why didn't you get some water?" FML

#21463299
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22147) - you deserved it (1945)

On 09/01/2015 at 7:07am - health - by Dehydrated - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I got fired from my childcare job of five years because the other staff weren't as popular with the kids, so they accused me of being "creepy" because the kids all wanted to play a game with me instead of them. FML

#21463241
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21233) - you deserved it (1133)

On 09/01/2015 at 12:40am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I invited an acquaintance over for tea. When he came in, I told him to make himself at home. He took it literally and now half of my pantry is messed up, my boyfriend's chocolate supply is gone, and I'm pretty sure our couch is broken. Thanks. FML

#21463240
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18048) - you deserved it (2744)

On 09/01/2015 at 12:37am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - New Zealand (Auckland)



FML's blog

  • Pauline's illustrated FML
  • Come on, no need to make that face ! Yep, it's sadly the last, mournful days of Summer. People are packing up their beach balls and flip flops, putting their caravans back into storage and trying to forget…

Friday 28 August 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: