Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

rcloca

Search for a member

rcloca

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 6864
  • Number of comments : 155
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About rcloca : Yes that is my puppy. Now stop stalking me.

rcloca's page activity

Visits<b>2potato4u</b> - the 08/19/2014 at 4:56pm<b>Demonface54</b> - the 08/09/2014 at 10:23am<b>johnlockshipper</b> - the 07/16/2014 at 4:01am<b>cadillacgal79</b> - the 07/14/2014 at 9:01pm<b>mattrd</b> - the 06/27/2014 at 10:20am<b>xivoricbutterfly</b> - the 06/09/2014 at 11:18pm<b>HiveMindFury</b> - the 04/10/2014 at 6:33am<b>klovemachine</b> - the 02/23/2014 at 6:11pm<b>Rizzen</b> - the 01/27/2014 at 10:35pm<b>CoolCat98</b> - the 12/14/2013 at 4:53pm<b>kellygranada</b> - the 12/01/2013 at 1:45pm<b>LiiaaBee</b> - the 11/09/2013 at 11:52am<b>euge741</b> - the 11/01/2013 at 3:28am<b>ak_breeze</b> - the 10/19/2013 at 9:45am<b>drCrustula</b> - the 09/21/2013 at 4:34pm<b>pumcin1</b> - the 09/01/2013 at 8:10pm<b>Fireashes250</b> - the 07/21/2013 at 7:52pm<b>badbitchxx</b> - the 06/29/2013 at 9:25pm

rcloca's FML badges

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

50 quality responses

Clicking reply to a comment is a worthy thing to do. To do so without getting buried is even better.

See all of rcloca's badges

rcloca's favorite FMLs

Today, while at work, I managed to scrape open the inside of my nose with my fingernail, drawing blood in the process. I had to quickly up an explanation for my scream that didn't go: "Well, I was scouting for boogers..." FML

#19612935
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5595) - you deserved it (20180)

On 05/12/2012 at 6:09pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - Netherlands (Utrecht)

Today, I discovered that my three-year-old daughter has mastered the art of pickpocketing. While I was driving to work this morning, my car broke down. I reached in my pocket to call AAA on my cell, only to find her squirt gun in its place. FML

#19612373
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19716) - you deserved it (2374)

On 05/12/2012 at 4:01pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I got all my wisdom teeth out. Have you ever thrown up after mouth surgery? Stomach acid in your bloody gum holes is just as fun as it sounds. FML

Today, I was heading to the bathroom when I clearly saw a little boy walking into my bedroom. My wife and I live alone, and I screamed at the top of my lungs, thinking he was a ghost. Turns out my wife collected him from school for a friend, and I just didn't hear them arrive. FML

#19608158
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22888) - you deserved it (6011)

On 05/11/2012 at 5:41pm - misc - by rongo12 (man) -

Today, I found out who my randomly assigned roommate was. Out of 10,000+ people, I just happen to get assigned a girl who threatened to kill me. FML

#19599121
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24256) - you deserved it (1697)

On 05/09/2012 at 7:26pm - misc - by roomingwithevil - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I corrected someone who spelled "learned" as "learnt" on my favorite forum. Nothing could've prepared me for the torrent of abuse that followed from the non-American members. Now I'm banned for "trolling," and all my 7,000+ posts since 2006 are gone forever. FML

#19593515
446 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14353) - you deserved it (36176)

On 05/08/2012 at 6:10pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I walked in on my daughter attempting to iron her pants with a hair straightener. She's 17. FML

#19590770
297 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21048) - you deserved it (5535)

On 05/08/2012 at 2:08am - kids - by SomePeoplesKids - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my four-year-old daughter started screaming and lashing out at me as I was getting her ready for a bath. It seems my idiot husband told her she was still small enough to be feasted on by the "drain monster". FML

#19587881
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23101) - you deserved it (2197)

On 05/07/2012 at 4:43pm - kids - by lon01t (woman) - United Kingdom (Falkirk)

Today, my girlfriend gave birth to our first child. Our nurse was the lady I had a one night stand with 3 nights ago, and yes she remembered me. FML

#19584401
215 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13251) - you deserved it (168960)

On 05/06/2012 at 9:44pm - intimacy - by T3STI (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I noticed my nephew has blue eyes, freckles and dimples which don't run in my family or my sister's husband's family, but they do run in my husband's family. FML

#19581290
323 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37030) - you deserved it (3698)

On 05/06/2012 at 9:53am - misc - by Damn (woman) - Australia

Today, I had a dream I was on the toilet taking the longest piss known to man. Unfortunately, it was partially true. FML

Today, on the bus, I caught the eye of this ugly, sweaty girl giving me a death stare through the driver's mirror. I gave her a death stare back. Only then I realized I was staring at myself. FML

#19579357
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10096) - you deserved it (31765)

On 05/05/2012 at 10:21pm - misc - by mhm (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I walked in on my new puppy peeing on the carpet. The trainer had told me to punish her when she's bad by shaking a metal can of pennies at her, since the noise scares dogs. I shook it at her, and she responded by having explosive diarrhea all over the carpet in fright. FML

#19578544
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17346) - you deserved it (29708)

On 05/05/2012 at 7:07pm - animals - by doggone - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was sitting on the toilet, pregnant as ever and really sick. I asked my fiancé to bring me a pair of clean underwear. He did so and brought me some lacy underwear. They weren't mine. FML

#19568325
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41032) - you deserved it (2551)

On 05/03/2012 at 1:00pm - love - by Turnipseed3 - United States

Today, I shot a paintball gun at a bees' nest. The bees flew through my neighbors' windows and, for lack of a better word, slaughtered them. An ambulance was called, and I feel like a total dick. FML

#19554232
262 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8400) - you deserved it (54724)

On 04/30/2012 at 5:34pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States



FML's blog

  • Jim Trim's Illustrated FML
  • Action stations! I'm back from my holiday, I've got some sort of weirdly uneven tan and I already want to go back to the beach to bum about and finish off my colouring book. But I can't. I'm still…

Friday 29 August 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: