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rayquaza5000

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rayquaza5000

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 4938
  • Number of comments : 24
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About rayquaza5000 : I love reading FMLs late at night. ;P

rayquaza5000's page activity

Visits<b>Googolman</b> - the 05/22/2014 at 4:01pm

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rayquaza5000's favorite FMLs

Today, I sat on Santa's lap. He got an erection. FML

#18404973
238 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39915) - you deserved it (9432)

On 12/01/2011 at 5:25pm - intimacy - by pops up - United States (Missouri)

Today, I was casually shopping at Walmart. Everything was normal until the young guy browsing the aisle next to me suddenly approached me and whispered "sperm" into my ear. My spine has never experienced a chill like this one before. FML

#18398754
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31263) - you deserved it (3778)

On 11/30/2011 at 10:11pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my son asked me where babies come from. I told him, "From god." He came back with, "Daddy said it was from fucking." FML

#18255063
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35798) - you deserved it (18839)

On 11/15/2011 at 12:20pm - intimacy - by lababy (woman) - United States

Today, I have two black eyes. The first one I got from the girl whose ass I mistakenly grabbed at a party last night. The other one I got from my girlfriend when I explained the first one. FML

#18240312
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15310) - you deserved it (29412)

On 11/13/2011 at 7:11pm - misc - by ThatHurts (man) - Canada

Today, I brought my girlfriend of six months over to meet my family. When my grandpa saw her, he said, "What a waste of good breeding stock." FML

#18236963
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23200) - you deserved it (2141)

On 11/13/2011 at 12:10pm - love - by mandie - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I'm on holiday with my boyfriend. Going through Chinese customs, an officer pulled us aside, removed a suspicious metal object from my boyfriend's luggage and called six other officers to have a look. It was a kinky pair of handcuffs. FML

#18235563
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24227) - you deserved it (5724)

On 11/13/2011 at 7:46am - love - by notthatkinkyanyway - China (Beijing)

Today, I found a note on my door that said "I masturbate to your pictures on Facebook." Someone else wrote "like" at the bottom. FML

#18224618
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38982) - you deserved it (7734)

On 11/12/2011 at 12:34am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I found out that my 20-year-old boyfriend won't touch my boobs because he is afraid his parents will find out. FML

#18203488
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42300) - you deserved it (5063)

On 11/09/2011 at 5:48pm - intimacy - by Great... (woman) - United States (Mississippi)

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex. My mum walked in and told him to pull out and show her that he was wearing a condom, and not just saying he was. FML

#18200253
257 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56005) - you deserved it (8320)

On 11/09/2011 at 7:55am - intimacy - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my boyfriend drove me home. I mentioned how I had recently started my period and he freaked out, saying I would "leak" through my tampon onto his seat. He made me sit on towels all the way home. FML

#18196154
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36584) - you deserved it (5889)

On 11/08/2011 at 8:20pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Ohio)

Today, my baby son latched onto my nipple for a feed, after a month of having to be bottle fed because he wouldn't latch. This would be fantastic, if it weren't for the fact that I'm his father, not his mother. FML

#18191670
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38818) - you deserved it (3857)

On 11/08/2011 at 9:01am - kids - by possiblyoverweight (man) - United Kingdom (Bristol)

Today, I sent my grandma a naked picture instead of my girlfriend. While attempting to delete it, I sent it again. FML

#18153680
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17238) - you deserved it (49116)

On 11/04/2011 at 12:38am - intimacy - by me (man) - United States (California)

Today, at the nail salon, a Korean woman was making fun of me. I kindly told her, in Korean, that I understood. She kindly told me, in English, that she didn't care. FML

#18150713
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41737) - you deserved it (3767)

On 11/03/2011 at 8:16pm - work - by EunJung - United States

Today, I ran into my boyfriend's dad. His exact words were, "Call me when you're ready to feel what a real man can do to you." FML

#18145171
318 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62360) - you deserved it (4617)

On 11/03/2011 at 3:29am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my 12 year-old daughter asked me where her scrotum is. FML

#18139418
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29205) - you deserved it (5152)

On 11/02/2011 at 4:18pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States



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