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rayquaza5000

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rayquaza5000

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
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  • Number of visits : 5157
  • Number of comments : 24
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About rayquaza5000 : I love reading FMLs late at night. ;P

rayquaza5000's page activity

Visits<b>Googolman</b> - the 05/22/2014 at 4:01pm

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rayquaza5000's favorite FMLs

Today, I got bored and decided to visit a porn site. I typed in the address and hit enter. A split second later, I realized I wasn't typing into the browser address bar, but in a chat window on my other screen. I'd been chatting with a girl I wanted to get with at the time. FML

#17719852
215 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13543) - you deserved it (60167)

On 09/11/2011 at 1:53pm - intimacy - by Extended_desktop (man) - Poland

Today, the creepy girl in my history class told me that she once spent a whole period doing nothing but counting the freckles on the right side of my face, and that I have more than she's ever seen before on anyone else combined. FML

#17712418
207 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29548) - you deserved it (2959)

On 09/10/2011 at 4:21pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, the really cute guy who asked for my number last night texted me. He wanted to know if he could get my friend's number, because he'd been too shy to ask her directly. FML

#17711612
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29456) - you deserved it (2382)

On 09/10/2011 at 2:19pm - love - by chicagobulls102 (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my parents overheard me having sex with my girlfriend. They thought it would be funny to barge in with nothing but underwear on. This has happened twice now. FML

#17710745
271 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33107) - you deserved it (25513)

On 09/10/2011 at 11:46am - intimacy - by RetroDayDreamer - United States (Texas)

Today, I decided to formally introduce my girlfriend to my parents. My dad took the opportunity to apologize for walking in on us a few days ago while we were having sex. It wasn't her. Thanks dad. FML

#17709124
583 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20931) - you deserved it (237574)

On 09/10/2011 at 2:35am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was eating some popcorn with a guy, and I noticed a piece of hair coming out my mouth. I pulled it... and pulled it... and eventually some popcorn pieces came out attached to the end of the hair. I was so embarrassed, he tried to make me feel better by saying it looked like a magic trick. FML

#17708928
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28720) - you deserved it (3785)

On 09/10/2011 at 1:57am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was masturbating while chewing gum. Halfway into the session, the gum flew down my throat, causing me to violently choke. My mom had to rush in and help me while I still had my pants around my ankles. FML

#17706134
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15363) - you deserved it (49239)

On 09/09/2011 at 7:22pm - intimacy - by omfgnooo (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I was on the phone with Microsoft Customer Service for about a total of 2 hours. That's the longest I've ever talked to anybody. FML

#17700838
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21274) - you deserved it (3939)

On 09/08/2011 at 11:30pm - misc - by Juicy12Jham - United States (Texas)

Today, my girlfriend told me she knows I've been cheating on her, and is desperate to prove she's "better than that other slut, or it's over between us." I've been pushed down and forcefully kissed ten times now. All because she saw a pic online of me kissing a girl. It was her. FML

#17699087
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37575) - you deserved it (4560)

On 09/08/2011 at 8:34pm - intimacy - by waj9876 - United States (Kentucky)

Today, my dad met my fiancé's dad for the first time. My fiancé's dad is a cop. He had arrested my dad for indecent exposure in the past. FML

#17691759
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34528) - you deserved it (2578)

On 09/07/2011 at 9:22pm - intimacy - by lolomg (woman) - New Zealand (Wellington)

Today, I was giving a talk in class, when halfway through someone pointed out that my pubes were sticking out my trousers. FML

#17690152
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26705) - you deserved it (13707)

On 09/07/2011 at 6:14pm - work - by Sammylad - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I have my very first gynecologist appointment. I'm 15. My mom wants to "be on the safe side" and make sure I'm not sexually active. This is my punishment for being a virgin. FML

#17688285
291 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31720) - you deserved it (3075)

On 09/07/2011 at 12:57pm - health - by AudraRose - United States

Today, I received an email from my boyfriend. It contained a link to a site that was titled "How to Give Head". It also said "Have a nice day!" FML

#17688076
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25176) - you deserved it (6905)

On 09/07/2011 at 12:16pm - intimacy - by thismakesmesad (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I lied to my diary about getting laid. FML

#17686832
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40661) - you deserved it (27812)

On 09/07/2011 at 4:51am - intimacy - by sadsadperson (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I left my book on the plane after I'd finished reading it. The flight attendant thought I'd forgotten it, so he chased me through the airport, past security, past customs, and past baggage claims. I didn't have the heart to tell him I left it on purpose. FML

#17685983
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8242) - you deserved it (40367)

On 09/07/2011 at 1:05am - work - by sad - Canada (Ontario)



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