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rasengan1544's FML badges
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rasengan1544's favorite FMLs
by Anonymous / 10/05/2012 at 1:49am / United States / Work
Today, I chaperoned a school dance. A song I knew came on, and, wanting to be the fun teacher, I danced around a little. The students then pointed and laughed. I graduated in '87 and high school still hurts. FML
by highschoolsucks / 10/04/2012 at 10:44pm / United States / Work
by imafunguy / 10/04/2012 at 8:28pm / United States / Love
by praise the prenup / 10/02/2012 at 8:04pm / United States (Ohio) / Intimacy
by oreoblizzard619 / 09/25/2012 at 8:13am / United States / Miscellaneous
by Fingkids / 09/24/2012 at 9:51pm / United States / Kids
Today, one of my regulars approached me at work, arms extended for a hug. He's always in a bad mood, so I figured for once he wasn't grumpy and I enthusiastically hugged him. Turns out he was just stretching his arms. He told me I was crazy and pretty much ran out of my store. FML
by MLAA / 09/24/2012 at 8:52pm / United States (California) / Work
by Anonymous / 09/24/2012 at 3:09pm / United States / Love
by mstar / 09/24/2012 at 1:01pm / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, I dropped a whole batch of penis-shaped cookies on the floor. Then I thought, "5-second rule" and started eating them. And then I realized that I was home alone, in pajamas, eating broken dick-cookies off the floor. FML
by RawrSparkle / 09/21/2012 at 3:31am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by Emily / 09/20/2012 at 9:39pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 09/20/2012 at 8:31am / United States / Geek
Today, I went to my dentist of four years. After the cleaning, the hygienist and I scheduled my next appointment, and she briefly left the room, leaving my file open on the computer. The data in a field called "NOTE" caught my eye: "Sissy. Freak. Always late. Ask about family or will flirt." FML
by Anonymous / 09/20/2012 at 12:14am / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, I walked in on my boyfriend trying on one of my little black dresses and heels. He wanted to "see what the fuss was about." I would have been angry if the sight of him dressed like this hadn't turned me on more than he ever has in the 3 years we've been dating. FML
by ClaireBear150 / 09/19/2012 at 11:09pm / Australia (Queensland) / Intimacy
Today, I was called into my 17-year-old son's high school. Why? Because it was Wednesday, also known as "Hump Day" and his friends managed to convince him that you're supposed to go around and hump people. FML
by Judy / 09/19/2012 at 7:33pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Kids
- 1Today, I took a test. I got up to turn it in, and accidentally bumped into another student. We both… 2Today, I tried to fire the worst worker I've ever had over the phone because he never shows up for… 3Today, my energetic 10-month-old decided to stay up four hours past bedtime. After I FINALLY got…