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rasengan1544

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rasengan1544
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1372
  • Number of comments : 22
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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rasengan1544's favorite FMLs

Today, at work, my buddy pulled up in his car. I handed him $40, and he handed me a bag. It must have looked like a drug deal, but he was actually just smuggling in the new Pokémon game for me. I'm 22, and a drug deal would probably have been less embarrassing to explain. FML

#20109009
216 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15053) - you deserved it (6496)

On 10/09/2012 at 12:03pm - work - by Anonymous - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I noticed that my penis looks tiny in my girlfriend's hands. Without thinking, I pointed it out to her. Now she thinks I have a small cock, and I think she has man-hands. Either way, we're both turned off. FML

#20108741
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11645) - you deserved it (29248)

On 10/09/2012 at 4:38am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, my friends dared me to answer the door naked for the pizza guy. I heard the doorbell but when I answered, it was the little boy from next door participating in a fundraiser. FML

#20107826
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6790) - you deserved it (30894)

On 10/08/2012 at 6:27pm - kids - by Anonymous - Canada (Nova Scotia)

Today, I realized the only reason why my boyfriend spends the night with me is because my house is closer to his job than his, and so he saves money on gas. FML

#20107548
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19480) - you deserved it (2443)

On 10/08/2012 at 2:57pm - love - by habsgurl0622 - United States (Alabama)

Today, despite having a mild case of the flu, I visited my boyfriend's house and watched a movie with his parents. During the movie, I felt the sudden urge to sneeze. Trying to hold it in, I managed to do the loudest fart I've ever done in my life. Everyone heard. FML

#20107056
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24281) - you deserved it (5063)

On 10/08/2012 at 5:12am - love - by embarrassed (woman) - Australia (South Australia)

Today, my boyfriend learned how to somersault. He now thinks that he's a ninja and somersaults into every room. FML

#20105538
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18029) - you deserved it (4007)

On 10/07/2012 at 10:20am - love - by justabitembarrassed - United States (Ohio)

Today, my boyfriend learned how to somersault. He now thinks that he's a ninja and somersaults into every room. FML

#20105538
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18029) - you deserved it (4007)

On 10/07/2012 at 10:20am - love - by justabitembarrassed - United States (Ohio)

Today, my boyfriend discovered that if he pulls out during doggy-style and rubs my clit with the tip of his penis, he will be rewarded with a queef. He found it hilarious and tested it out 5 more times. FML

#20105380
254 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28527) - you deserved it (6153)

On 10/07/2012 at 6:25am - intimacy - by SoSexy (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was fiddling around with the thermostat at my new place. For a laugh, I twisted the knob all the way to 40° celsius, when it snapped off. I don't have a clue how to fix it. FML

#20104478
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6511) - you deserved it (34152)

On 10/06/2012 at 4:29pm - misc - by didntknowyoucouldbreakit (man) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, I was walking in the freezing rain when a guy asked me if I wanted to share his umbrella with him. I grinned and told him I did. He then noticed a pretty girl walking behind me and he abruptly turned to her and asked her the same question. FML

#20104191
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22140) - you deserved it (1763)

On 10/06/2012 at 11:52am - misc - by FML_Elle - United States

Today, I wanted to surprise my long distance girlfriend by flying to her unannounced. When I arrived at her house, her family tells me that she herself boarded an unannounced flight to where I lived hours ago. Surprise. FML

#20103950
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27634) - you deserved it (3143)

On 10/06/2012 at 6:04am - love - by Jex (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, as an introduction to the history of China, I asked my APA World History class to write a 500 word essay on a historical Chinese person. Out of a class of 18, five of them were about Mulan. FML

#20102571
215 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17837) - you deserved it (3971)

On 10/05/2012 at 5:47am - work - by desperate (woman) - Malta

Today, while at my job as a hairdresser, I was giving an elderly client a perm and I thought she'd fallen asleep. She'd died. FML

#20102415
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45197) - you deserved it (1821)

On 10/05/2012 at 1:49am - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I chaperoned a school dance. A song I knew came on, and, wanting to be the fun teacher, I danced around a little. The students then pointed and laughed. I graduated in '87 and high school still hurts. FML

#20102154
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18355) - you deserved it (5247)

On 10/04/2012 at 10:44pm - work - by highschoolsucks - United States

Today, I asked a girl out. She replied, "Sorry, I'm suddenly a lesbian." FML

#20101904
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23493) - you deserved it (2207)

On 10/04/2012 at 8:28pm - love - by imafunguy (man) - United States



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