raphanne

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raphanne

57Fucked!

raphanneraphanne
  • Town/Country : Strasbourg, France
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 28 April 1989 (27 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 12819
  • Number of comments : 656
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About raphanne : I'm probably eating cheese or drinking Baileys. Not both at the same time though, don't worry.

I like random messages, so don't hesitate to write to me if you feel like it.

raphanne's page activity

Visits<b>doubledutchy</b> - 4 hours ago<b>jforhan</b> - yesterday at 4:51am<b>Talented73</b> - yesterday at 6:01pm<b>PotatoGod</b> - the 12/02/2016 at 6:00pm<b>rengoonhoo</b> - the 12/01/2016 at 5:13pm<b>MaknaeMelanie</b> - the 11/24/2016 at 2:26am<b>demetrius1551</b> - the 11/23/2016 at 11:38pm<b>Blakeless00</b> - the 11/23/2016 at 5:53pm<b>namiblue</b> - the 11/23/2016 at 1:56pm<b>dumbmotherinlaw</b> - the 11/23/2016 at 12:59am<b>rae_siah_3x</b> - the 11/22/2016 at 10:50pm<b>Deadpool47</b> - the 11/22/2016 at 9:42pm<b>CowTippingDwarfs</b> - the 11/22/2016 at 8:21pm<b>elsie23</b> - the 11/22/2016 at 7:40pm<b>Willman757</b> - the 11/22/2016 at 7:17pm<b>sergiu_d</b> - the 11/22/2016 at 4:39pm<b>Greions</b> - the 11/22/2016 at 3:57pm<b>fastman19</b> - the 11/22/2016 at 3:08pm

Fucked!<b>Talented73</b> - yesterday at 12:01am<b>CowTippingDwarfs</b> - the 11/22/2016 at 11:45pm<b>fastman19</b> - the 11/22/2016 at 9:08pm<b>Magnoxidans</b> - the 11/16/2016 at 10:01am<b>chirstinap325</b> - the 11/14/2016 at 12:42am<b>rogwest</b> - the 10/30/2016 at 5:04am<b>nider</b> - the 10/23/2016 at 10:08pm<b>Jdgreen429</b> - the 10/22/2016 at 11:43pm<b>Warmonger_Smurf</b> - the 10/22/2016 at 8:52pm<b>BoneCollector</b> - the 10/22/2016 at 2:48am<b>jrmertz00</b> - the 10/21/2016 at 7:49pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 10/21/2016 at 7:12pm<b>rashadkhanracing</b> - the 10/20/2016 at 4:49pm<b>StormfrontX33</b> - the 10/06/2016 at 5:07pm<b>zacharyd650</b> - the 10/06/2016 at 3:31am<b>Eleora</b> - the 10/03/2016 at 4:18am<b>StiffPvtParts</b> - the 10/01/2016 at 3:20pm<b>Tenker</b> - the 09/26/2016 at 5:17am

raphanne's FML badges

This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

See all of raphanne's badges

raphanne's favorite FMLs

Today, while at the store, my fly became undone. It doesn't seem that bad unless an old lady comes to "zip it up for you." FML

by Anonymous / 10/25/2009 at 2:28pm / United States (Alaska) / Miscellaneous

Today, I learned that "Je suis excité" does not mean "I'm excited" in French. It means "I'm sexually excited"... more or less. I've been doing a lot of exciting things and using it a lot the past two weeks. With my French friends, people I meet, and especially with my host family. FML

by Anonymous / 09/21/2009 at 10:26am / France (Rhone-Alpes) / Intimacy

Today, I pulled someone over for speeding. He was only 10 over the speed limit so I gave him an $84 fine. It turns out he is a workplace Occupational Health and Safety officer and because I wasn't wearing my high visibilty vest while standing on the side of the road he gave me a $250 fine. FML

by auscop / 09/17/2009 at 6:57am / Australia (Western Australia) / Transportation

Today, I was going to work and got in the elevator. I was going through my bag for my phone and asked the man in the elevator to push the button for me. He gave me a look of death before I realized he had no arms. FML

by elevatorjerk / 09/02/2009 at 9:01am / United States / Work

Today, my husband woke me up at 3 AM by putting whipped cream on my hand and tickling my nose with a feather. FML

by pistonchamp159 / 08/28/2009 at 3:51am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I cleaned my house after a big party. Everything was great when my parents came home. Except for the bottle of hot and spicy mustard next to the shampoo in the shower. No one knows how it got there. I'm busted because of mustard. FML

by Anonymous / 07/30/2009 at 6:38am / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, my dad woke me up by shaking me and saying "If you're not up in two minutes, I'm lighting a firecracker in your room." Thinking he wouldn't possibly set off a firecracker in the house, much less my room, I decided to call his bluff. My room still smells like gunpowder. FML

by Singed / 07/04/2009 at 1:31pm / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

Today, I got prostate examination for the first time. Now I can't decide what's worse, the fact that I got a boner when the doc inserted his finger, or the fact that my wife told the story to pretty much everybody we know. FML

by prostate / 06/08/2009 at 9:48am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I was preparing a dinner for some business associates, in hopes of closing the deal on a promotion. I emailed them with the menu, in case there were any allergies. Hours later, I checked the email again to find that instead of serving the Roast Duck I would be serving the Roast Fuck. FML

by wordmalfunction / 05/25/2009 at 5:42pm / United Kingdom (London) / Miscellaneous

Today, one of my three-year-old twin daughters asked, "Dad, can we get a cat?" I replied in a gentle dad voice, "No, honey, dad is allergic to cats. That means they make him sneeze and sniffle. So we can't get a cat. Sorry." After a slight pause, the other asked, "When you die can we get a cat?" FML

by TwinDad / 05/14/2009 at 11:24am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Kids

Today, I left a party after drinking, and was soon pulled over. I frantically grabbed my mouthwash I keep for emergency situations to cover up the alcohol smell on my breath. I was given the breathalyzer almost immediately. I blew a 2.37. Apparently, alcohol is the main ingredient of Listerine. FML

by breathalizard / 05/02/2009 at 2:21am / United States (North Dakota) / Health

Today, I was woken up to my mom playing the piano awfully. I screamed down the stairs "you suck, stop playing!" Turns out it was my 5 year old cousin playing a recital. For my entire family. FML

by christinabear / 04/15/2009 at 1:14am / United States (New Jersey) / Kids

Today, I was working as a swim instructor for kids. Teaching them not to be afraid of the water, I put my face in the water and blew bubbles. I asked them to try it. All of them did, except for one. I went right to him and blew bubbles again. He then said to me, "but I just peed in that water." FML

by poolboy / 04/14/2009 at 4:51am / United States (Nevada) / Kids

Today, my good friend who just had a baby girl sent her newborn's pictures to me via picture message. To reply, instead of writing "Awwwwww" I wrote "Ewwwwww" by mistake. FML

by nothing / 04/08/2009 at 4:42pm / United States (New Jersey) / Kids

Today, while at the Golden Gate Bridge, I spotted a large group of Asians trying to take a picture. Trying to help, I slowly say, "You... want me... take picture?" while using hand motions. The man looks at me and says, "No thanks asshole, I got it," in plain English. FML

by Tourist / 03/26/2009 at 3:19am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous