randomfool619

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randomfool619

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Friday 20 December 1985 (30 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 4020
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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randomfool619's page activity

Visits<b></b> - the 01/11/2011 at 2:37am<b>RandomFool</b> - the 04/20/2009 at 6:38pm<b>ohsoale</b> - the 04/14/2009 at 5:17pm<b>jazminbliss</b> - the 04/01/2009 at 7:25am<b>foamsinmouth</b> - the 03/31/2009 at 11:50am<b>WOWZA</b> - the 03/02/2009 at 10:30am

randomfool619's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

randomfool619's favorite FMLs

Today, I was on webcam with my boyfriend. A while later I forgot about it and started digging my nose vigorously. He then beeped me and said "Digging for gold, dear? " FML

by carmelita / 07/16/2009 at 11:09am / Singapore / Miscellaneous

Today, my younger brother, who is 15, had to show me the quickest way to take off a woman's bra. I'm 12 years older than he is. FML

by nerd_man01 / 07/10/2009 at 3:20pm / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, I paid $80 to change my cell number because my ex-girlfriend had been stalking me. To inform all of my friends of the change, I sent a mass text message to everyone in my phonebook. Including my ex. FML

by Blackberry / 07/10/2009 at 3:15pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Love

Today, I found out that my father, who is divorced from my mother, has set up a lawsuit against her and that I am required to go to court and testify against her as a witness. I've tried to keep neutral for six years, and I'll go to jail if I don't show up. FML

by Anonymous / 07/07/2009 at 1:46am / United States (Hawaii) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out that my girlfriend of two years broke up with me because she wants to "become" a lesbian. I also learned that she's coming to my house for dinner tonight. My sister is her date. FML

by fd_uplife / 07/05/2009 at 12:46pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Love

Today, I met a great girl at a party. We talked alone, and she made me promise I'd dance with her later. When I saw her later, she was unconscious, and in an ambulance. She'd collapsed, and the entire party assumed I'd spiked her drink. FML

by curiousorange / 07/05/2009 at 11:58am / United Kingdom (London) / Love

Today, I was at my girlfriend's house for dinner. Her mom gave me some seasoned cauliflower, which I didn't like. Not wanting to dissapoint my girlfriend's mom, I slipped the cauliflower of my plate and gave it to their dog. It turns out cauliflower gives their dog explosive diarrhea. FML

by BigBallah93 / 07/05/2009 at 11:23am / China (Beijing) / Animals

Today, my mom put some bubblewrap on my desk because she thought I would have fun with it. I'm 18. It was awesome. FML

by Jeweler / 06/26/2009 at 2:13am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I rushed home to tell my parents my girlfriend had accepted my proposal. They asked how I could be so selfish at a time like this. Apparently, Michael Jackson's death is more important than their son. FML

by Tom / 06/25/2009 at 8:56pm / United States (New York) / Love

Today, I was cashiering at Target when an old woman came into my checkout line. Her items? Variety pack of pleasuring condoms, a bottle of KY sensual lube, and two colorful thongs. As I'm scanning these, she leans in and whispers, "I love toys." FML

by the_captain / 06/22/2009 at 8:21pm / United States (Oregon) / Work

Today, my husband and I were getting it on when we heard a little giggle. I put on my robe and looked outside my room to find that no one was there. So we continued. I later called my seven year old son and out he came crawling from under the bed. FML

by Anonymous / 06/22/2009 at 7:41pm / United States (New York) / Love

Today, I decided to use fake tan, seeing as I am so pale. Everywhere I have been today, I have had children behind me. Singing the Oompa Loompa song. FML

by OompaLoompa / 06/18/2009 at 9:32am / United Kingdom / Miscellaneous

Today, as a prank, my friends put a big bucket of water on my door so that it would spill on me as I exited my room. It would have been funny if I hadn't been holding my $900 laptop as I was walking out. FML

by Dominic / 06/14/2009 at 3:14pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Work

Today, my sister and I got fitted for bridesmaid's dresses. It was pretty sheer material, so I took off my bright pink thong and left it on the changing room hanger. As I was looking at myself in the mirror, a woman came out of the room holding my thong. She had tried it on. FML

by anonymous1 / 06/13/2009 at 8:43pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I woke up from a dream about finding a vending machine that gave me free food. I kept eating, it was so satisfying words could not describe how great it felt. Then I realized my hands were in between my legs, I had been touching myself dreaming about free food from a vending machine. FML

by hdat / 06/11/2009 at 1:51pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Intimacy