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Offline (the 03/17/2015 at 5:22am)



  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 447
  • Number of comments : 18
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About ralmilk : I love to sing, listen to music, and play computer games (the true forever alone, but I'm okay with that) Feel free to message me :)

ralmilk's page activity

Visits<b>eyepuppy</b> - the 06/25/2016 at 7:28am<b>ryerye942</b> - the 06/02/2015 at 11:15am<b>dgtanner</b> - the 08/23/2014 at 2:49pm<b>jgilmanx13</b> - the 04/13/2014 at 12:08pm<b>colerean</b> - the 01/29/2014 at 1:14am<b>taylor21398</b> - the 01/03/2014 at 12:27am<b>ajax_united</b> - the 11/29/2013 at 4:54pm<b>cskipgolfer2013</b> - the 09/28/2013 at 7:24pm<b>Wizardo</b> - the 09/27/2013 at 1:19pm<b>sweet0cheeks</b> - the 09/26/2013 at 9:09pm<b>Sjus</b> - the 09/25/2013 at 5:14pm<b>abreu1556</b> - the 09/22/2013 at 9:37pm<b>eyunayev</b> - the 09/22/2013 at 10:05am<b>taylor27gang</b> - the 09/22/2013 at 9:00am<b>virgilcole505</b> - the 09/21/2013 at 2:24am<b>sirdroosef</b> - the 09/20/2013 at 11:36am<b>olpally</b> - the 09/20/2013 at 10:03am<b>Conn3ct</b> - the 09/18/2013 at 1:14am

ralmilk's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

See all of ralmilk's badges

ralmilk's favorite FMLs

Today, my daughter told me she is pregnant. The father is the foreign exchange student who just moved back to Germany. FML

by monkey / 09/19/2013 at 6:30am / United States (Ohio) / Kids

Today, I helped my brother propose to his girlfriend of 5 years in the spot where they had first met. As he delivered his heartfelt speech, a sizable crowd appeared. When he got down on one knee, she punched him in the gut, yelled, "I never loved you", and ran away. Now he won't talk to me. FML

by ElizaZee / 09/18/2013 at 9:45pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Love

Today, I came home to find that my house had been broken into. After assessing the loss, I saw a taunting note on the fridge saying, "Locks work best when the door's SHUT." My housekeeper had apparently left the door wide open. FML

by Anonymous / 09/17/2013 at 1:23pm / United States (Alabama) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was lying naked on my boyfriend's bed for the first time ever. He glanced at me, then started playing with a Rubik's cube. FML

by someone / 09/17/2013 at 12:38pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, it was my first day closing alone at a pet store when a lady came in wanting to return a bird she bought months ago. Once I informed her there were no returns on livestock, she let the bird free and ran out the door, leaving me to catch it and explain to my manager where it came from. FML

by tay / 09/17/2013 at 11:44am / Canada (Ontario) / Work

Today, I met my birth mother. My dad won't talk to me, my mom won't stop crying and thinks I'm replacing her, and the rest of my family won't stop calling me a bitch. I'm 21, and I just wanted to meet the woman who pushed me head-first out of her vagina. FML

Today, it's my wedding day. Almost a year ago I was in a terrible car accident that nearly left me paralyzed, but I worked my ass off to be able to walk down the aisle. After a lot of blood, sweat, and tears I made it to the big day... and woke up with food poisoning. FML

by somethingblue / 09/16/2013 at 5:11pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Health

Today, I woke up, thinking it was going to be a good day. However, when I looked at my phone, I saw that my girlfriend had sent me an obscene number of angry messages, which are still coming in, because I forgot to say goodnight to her last night. FML

by Jake / 09/16/2013 at 3:08pm / United States (Oregon) / Love

Today, I bought a live lobster to have for dinner. When my four year old daughter discovered it in the cooler, she thanked me incessantly for finally getting her a pet. She now won't let "Mr. Shelly" out of her sight. FML

by meganmagee / 09/16/2013 at 2:47pm / United States (Georgia) / Kids

Today, my son asked me if slavery was ever abolished. He's 19. FML

by Anonymous / 09/16/2013 at 1:42pm / United States (New York) / Kids

Today, my mum got engaged to her American pen-pal, who is in prison over there for murder. FML

by Stheno / 09/16/2013 at 8:49am / United Kingdom (Bristol, City of) / Love

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, a lady stormed into the pharmacy I work at and chewed me out because the medicine I sold her the day before gave her horrible diarrhea as a "side effect". I checked, and it was the medicine she asked for - laxatives. FML

by anonymous / 09/16/2013 at 1:35am / United States (Oregon) / Health

Today, my doctor asked me to undo my bra so he could check my breathing without the straps restricting my lungs, I got home and told my friends how awkward it was. Not one of them has had this happen to them before. We all go to the same doctor. FML

by chestycough / 09/16/2013 at 12:35am / Australia (New South Wales) / Health