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  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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rallets

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rallets
  • Town/Country : Chicago, Il, USA
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Sunday 26 August 1990 (21 years)
  • Number of visits : 27624
  • Number of comments : 1510
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About rallets : hello :D

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rallets's favorite FMLs

Today, I was arrested for breaking into a house. This is what happens when I lose my key. FML

#18360363 (123)

I agree, your life sucks (7592) - you deserved it (1106)

On 11/26/2011 at 9:33pm - misc - by Matthew - United States (Texas)

Today, the first snow of the season fell. My husband celebrated by pelting me with snowballs, while I was on the toilet. FML

#18289580 (194)

I agree, your life sucks (23047) - you deserved it (4297)

On 11/19/2011 at 2:08pm - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I ran into an old friend. I asked her how she was doing, then asked, "And your mum?" Just as the words escaped my lips, I remembered her mom died a few years ago. Trying to save face, I messed up again and blurted, "She still in the same graveyard?" FML

#18041933 (190)

I agree, your life sucks (12726) - you deserved it (31640) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 10/21/2011 at 10:09pm - misc - by Virginiedetibo - France

Today, I was washing my hands in the bathroom when I looked up and saw a spider on my cheek. Panicking, I slapped myself in the face as hard as I could to kill it. Turns out the spider was on the mirror. FML

#18013165 (183)

I agree, your life sucks (14206) - you deserved it (25963)

On 10/18/2011 at 2:55am - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Missouri)

Today, I forgot what I was doing while listening to a voicemail and started talking back to it. FML

#17918241 (122)

I agree, your life sucks (14183) - you deserved it (7188)

On 10/06/2011 at 6:46am - misc - by xoccerplaya - United States (Hawaii)

Today, I got a text from someone I've been avoiding saying, "Can I come visit you today?" I replied, "No, sorry, I'm not home." They then replied "Then who is that in your living room?" FML

#17913530 (174)

I agree, your life sucks (24688) - you deserved it (5006)

On 10/05/2011 at 7:48pm - misc - by Pookaa (woman) - United States (Maine)

Today, my son thought it was a good idea to spray deodorant into his mouth because he wanted fresh breath. This resulted in him passing out. My son is 17. FML

#17892835 (189)

I agree, your life sucks (25083) - you deserved it (3767)

On 10/03/2011 at 12:26am - kids - by Ramis182 (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I used a public restroom with very shiny floors. So shiny, in fact, that I could see a clear reflection of the person in the next stall. I'm pretty sure they could see me too. FML

#17877731 (140)

I agree, your life sucks (20442) - you deserved it (1788)

On 10/01/2011 at 10:18am - misc - by anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my mother lectured me about going to the bar too often. She did this while rolling a joint. FML

#17854622 (170)

I agree, your life sucks (23444) - you deserved it (3819)

On 09/28/2011 at 10:04am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I shat a magnet. FML

#17843744 (306)

I agree, your life sucks (3458) - you deserved it (8252)

On 09/26/2011 at 10:51pm - health - by mimi - United States (Illinois)

Today, at work while on the toilet, somebody came into the stall next to me and gave a loud play by play of every fart, plop, and grunt. He then asked loudly who I was and when I didn't answer put his head under the stall to look at me. FML

#17839732 (259)

I agree, your life sucks (29161) - you deserved it (2027)

On 09/26/2011 at 2:52pm - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I bought a UV light so I could detect cat pee, since I was sure my cat was relieving herself on the carpet. I decided to try it out in the living room first. Nearly half the room lit up like a Christmas tree. FML

#17829441 (166)

I agree, your life sucks (9345) - you deserved it (1537)

On 09/25/2011 at 12:15pm - animals - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I went out with a guy I really liked for the first time. He tried to hold my hands, only to be stopped by my mum, jumping out from nowhere saying "Oh no you don't!" before slapping him. This isn't the first time this has happened. FML

#17827987 (249)

I agree, your life sucks (30893) - you deserved it (2112)

On 09/25/2011 at 6:26am - love - by Anonymous - Singapore

Today, my girlfriend of 3 years said she was leaving me because recently I wasn't making much money, and was playing too many video games. I recently got a raise at my job of 5 years. The job? Testing video games. FML

#17827650 (311)

I agree, your life sucks (11990) - you deserved it (992)

On 09/25/2011 at 4:12am - love - by Eric Moore - United States (Texas)

Today, I bought a lanyard for my new car keys. "Epic Fail" was printed on it. Not two hours after getting it and putting my keys on it, I locked them in my car. I don't have a spare. FML

#17826214 (161)

I agree, your life sucks (3168) - you deserved it (7780)

On 09/25/2011 at 12:18am - misc - by Anonymous - United States