rachelm17

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Offline (the 06/12/2015 at 9:27pm)

rachelm17

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1366
  • Number of comments : 7
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

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rachelm17's page activity

Visits<b>itta_pupu</b> - the 10/24/2015 at 12:22pm<b>saminfiniti</b> - the 07/30/2015 at 11:27am<b>terryaly</b> - the 06/12/2015 at 10:08pm<b>fooltemptress</b> - the 11/10/2014 at 9:34pm<b>robsmit98</b> - the 09/28/2014 at 2:41pm<b>AnaMoore</b> - the 06/19/2014 at 11:54am<b>jad0016</b> - the 06/17/2014 at 7:48pm<b>cjspenny</b> - the 06/14/2014 at 5:16am<b>Larissa24</b> - the 06/12/2014 at 7:09pm<b>maxyutd</b> - the 06/01/2014 at 10:26am<b>JaykeXD</b> - the 06/01/2014 at 3:49am<b>petitcrapaud3113</b> - the 05/30/2014 at 4:38pm<b>emily1015</b> - the 05/29/2014 at 5:58pm<b>XPhoenixFire</b> - the 05/29/2014 at 7:56am<b>SuperJay2806</b> - the 05/29/2014 at 7:07am<b>Thunderlaxus</b> - the 05/29/2014 at 3:02am<b>jdid</b> - the 05/28/2014 at 10:56pm<b>A07</b> - the 05/28/2014 at 6:07am

rachelm17's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

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rachelm17's favorite FMLs

Today, at my football game, I turned around to spit so that it would be away from my teammates. I ended up spitting on a 10-year-old kid walking behind me. FML

by whoops / 07/09/2014 at 1:38am / Canada (Ontario) / Kids

Today, I woke up to an old lady right outside my open window, saying "Hello in there! Are you sleepy?" I was so startled that I answered her. She screamed. Turns out she's my neighbour's elderly mother, didn't know I was in there, and was talking to my cat. FML

by ADanceWithDavos / 07/07/2014 at 11:59am / United Kingdom / Animals

Today, my boyfriend said that he doesn't have to marry me because we coincidentally have the same last name. FML

by Anonymous / 07/06/2014 at 9:27pm / United States (Virginia) / Love

Today, after a power outage at my house, my 14-year-old brother was genuinely confused as to why our flashlights still worked if we had no electricity. FML

by idiot bro / 07/06/2014 at 2:04pm / United States (Maine) / Miscellaneous

Today, my brain decided to go into suicide mode. So far I've managed to open a fridge door into my face, walk balls-first into the corner of a table, and sliced my finger while trying to cut open some thick plastic packaging with scissors. I'll probably be dead by the time this is posted. FML

by FMyBrain / 06/06/2014 at 5:26pm / United States (Alaska) / Health

Today, an older gentleman came into my work for underwear. I helped him find his size, pulled out a pair of navy ones and he then turned to me and said, "I don't want dark colours because I can't tell if I've shit myself." He then continued looking for all the white pairs. FML

by unashamed / 06/05/2014 at 4:11am / Australia (Queensland) / Work

Today, in the fitting rooms at work, a 10-year-old kid threw a coat-hanger directly at my face. The kid's father didn't apologise on his behalf, but instead congratulated him on what he called "a wicked shot". FML

by anonymous / 06/04/2014 at 1:07am / New Zealand (Auckland) / Work

Today, my grandmother tried to start a fist-fight with my wife during my wedding ceremony. FML

by Anonymous / 06/02/2014 at 2:17pm / United States (California) / Love

Today, I walked in on my 15 year old daughter and her boyfriend. They were standing in my bathroom, both naked from the waist down. Supposedly, he was trying to "teach her how to pee standing up." FML

by help me / 06/01/2014 at 11:51am / United States (Connecticut) / Intimacy

Today, my husband thought it would be hilarious to slip a little fake blood into the bathtub while I was relaxing in it, eyes closed. When I opened my eyes, the water was one big cloud of red. I screamed so loud that I might as well have been dying, and yes, he recorded everything. FML

by N O / 05/27/2014 at 2:47pm / Canada (Ontario) / Love

Today, I came down with diarrhea thanks to a particularly low-class restaurant. My dad has been making constant stupid puns like "pretty shitty state you're in" and "this day and age, you just don't expect this crap". I'm at the point where I want to gouge his eyes out with a goddamn spoon. FML

by fuckmuppet / 05/27/2014 at 1:04pm / United Kingdom (Oxfordshire) / Health

Today, my friend announced that she'd lost weight recently. As I was congratulating her, my baby sister said, "I think you're still fat but that's good because you can give more meat to God when you go to heaven." Now I have to explain to a 6-year-old that God isn't a cannibal. FML

by Anonymous / 05/26/2014 at 7:37am / United Kingdom (Wolverhampton) / Kids

Today, thanks to my phone's shitty predictive text combined with me being half-asleep, I accidentally offered my heartbroken buddy "oral support" if he ever needs it. FML

by whoops / 05/25/2014 at 5:23pm / United States (Tennessee) / Intimacy

Today, my 5-year-old son woke up early and ran into my bedroom to wake me up. Unfortunately, he did this by jumping onto my bed, slamming his knee into my balls in the process. I had to explain my tears of agony away by claiming I was just so happy to see him. FML

by todaddy / 05/23/2014 at 3:32pm / United Kingdom / Kids

Today, an old lady fell in the street, and I rushed to help her. As I tried to help her to her feet, she started screaming, "She pushed me! She pushed me!" I froze up in shock, and ended up being chased by some guy who thought I'd attacked her. FML

by notgoodwitholdpeople / 05/23/2014 at 12:00pm / Singapore / Miscellaneous