Submit your FML story
- - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
About queenbitch1996 : I'm 14yrs. old and I think dark humor is funnie. I like to be considered unique rather than a cookie-cutter type of person. I'm energetic and VERY hyper and very athletic. I like to make fun of fat people every chance I get so, If you're fat and you're reading this... They're going to have to make your coffin at your funeral 3x's the size of a normal dead person. If you're fat nice person the, Hi you can call me Teletubbie. If you like me, that's GREAT!!! If you don't, the get theF*CK off my page!!!
Peace Out Girl Scout,
Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!
Checking you out
You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.
Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.
Today, my brother's girlfriend and my girlfriend went out shopping. My brother's girlfriend bought a pair of killer black heels and a box of condoms. My girlfriend bought a pair of orange Crocs and a vibrator. FML
Today, my mom came into my bedroom and told me to listen to this voicemail. I listened to me and my girlfriend talking dirty followed by the bed springs bouncing for 3 minutes. I had my phone in the pocket while I was having sex with her and it left my mom a nice voicemail. FML
Today, I bought my girlfriend an expensive chihuahua puppy because she was never allowed to have one as a kid. She was so excited and happy so she leaned in to give it a kiss. It bit her in the face, she had to get stitches, and they put the $500 dog to sleep. FML
Friday 28 August 2015