queenbitch1996

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queenbitch1996

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 14 November 1994 (21 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3884
  • Number of comments : 2
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 8 posted

About queenbitch1996 : I'm 14yrs. old and I think dark humor is funnie. I like to be considered unique rather than a cookie-cutter type of person. I'm energetic and VERY hyper and very athletic. I like to make fun of fat people every chance I get so, If you're fat and you're reading this... They're going to have to make your coffin at your funeral 3x's the size of a normal dead person. If you're fat nice person the, Hi you can call me Teletubbie. If you like me, that's GREAT!!! If you don't, the get theF*CK off my page!!!

Peace Out Girl Scout,
teletubbie :p

http://www.youtube.com/user/redtop542001#p/a/f/1/k40iccZFWfw

queenbitch1996's page activity

Visits<b>dcam13</b> - the 03/04/2014 at 7:31pm<b>legendaryplya</b> - the 02/23/2014 at 10:06am<b>tophilis</b> - the 07/29/2013 at 6:49am<b>BeMyWonderwall</b> - the 07/28/2012 at 5:56am<b>IDontFlush</b> - the 01/28/2012 at 7:02pm<b>lmc94</b> - the 10/23/2011 at 4:40pm<b>FlippinNick</b> - the 09/26/2011 at 7:58am<b>JERZBornNRaised</b> - the 09/14/2011 at 7:00pm<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 9:06pm<b>mylifesucksserio</b> - the 08/30/2011 at 3:31am<b>Riiley</b> - the 06/22/2011 at 10:48am<b></b> - the 03/10/2011 at 4:12am<b>ilovejunkfood</b> - the 01/26/2011 at 5:36pm<b>pureecstasy</b> - the 01/25/2011 at 9:49pm<b>Mervin22</b> - the 01/25/2011 at 6:57pm<b>josepigo</b> - the 01/23/2011 at 3:43pm<b>lxclark</b> - the 01/23/2011 at 11:07am<b>ColdBlackLies</b> - the 01/22/2011 at 7:12pm

queenbitch1996's FML badges

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

See all of queenbitch1996's badges

queenbitch1996's favorite FMLs

Today, I found out that my neighbors took it upon themselves to knock down the fence we shared, and putting up a new one. Thus fencing my pool into their yard. When I asked them why, he replied, "We thought you weren't coming back." I was gone for 4 months tending to my sister with breast cancer. FML

by Pool-less / 09/04/2011 at 2:09am / United States (Missouri) / Miscellaneous

Today, I learned what it felt like to get shot in the nuts by an airsoft gun. Thank you, Mom. FML

by Anonymous / 09/01/2011 at 6:52am / United States / Health

Today, I was out shopping when an old lady bumped into me and dropped her purse. Trying to help, I bent over to pick it up, at which point she battered the shit out of me, called me a "filthy thief" and threatened to open an umbrella in my ass. What the fuck has the world come to? FML

by Anonymous / 08/25/2011 at 5:17pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I woke up to a mosquito feeding on my morning wood; probably the only thing that will ever suck my penis. FML

by no one / 05/21/2011 at 5:07am / United States (Alaska) / Intimacy

Today, I had my new girlfriend over for dinner. Halfway through the meal, my dad started poking her with his fork. When I asked him what the hell he was doing, he barked back, "Just making sure she isn't a blow-up doll!" FML

by Anonymous / 05/20/2011 at 7:30pm / United States (California) / Love

Today, my boyfriend refused to go down on me because I smelled of baby lotion and it made him feel like a child molester. FML

by skiittlez713 / 05/20/2011 at 4:40am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, I got concussion after a goat ran in front of me while I was jogging. FML

by Anonymous / 04/26/2011 at 11:07pm / United States / Animals

Today, I was mugged. The guy mugging me was eating a banana. FML

by wtfisthisworldcomingto / 04/25/2011 at 8:11am / Miscellaneous

Today, I was at a grocery store with my 3 year old son. As I was picking a cereal out, an older man comes over and says, "You should have used condoms. What an ugly boy." FML

by ravenskater / 04/03/2011 at 10:47pm / Kids

Today, I found out that when I orgasm, my increased heart rate causes me to pass out. I also found out my boyfriend doesn't stop when I'm unconscious. FML

by anonymous / 03/19/2011 at 6:32am / United Kingdom (Kent) / Intimacy

Today, someone rear-ended me while I was on my way home. I was extremely upset and I called my boyfriend for comfort and to help inspect the damage. After taking a good look at the car, he said, "Damn, if only you fucked this hard." FML

by emm / 03/18/2011 at 12:11pm / United States (Florida) / Intimacy

Today, my father came over to my house. I realized there were condoms on the table, so I subtly moved a vase to hide them. He then gave me an unamused look and said "I know you have sex. You've been married for nine years. Grow the fuck up, dumbass." FML

by Anonymous / 03/17/2011 at 7:52pm / United States (Ohio) / Intimacy

Today, I was spending Saint Patrick's Day with my girlfriend, when she started pinching me for not wearing green. To my complete shock, when she pinched my nipple, I got the biggest, most noticeable erection I've ever had in my life, and no matter what I did, it wouldn't go away. We were in public. FML

by Mr. Sensitive Nips / 03/17/2011 at 6:38pm / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, I got mugged by a midget. FML

by insomnitude / 03/05/2011 at 1:55am / United States (Oklahoma) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was ambushed by a very angry beaver. FML

by Anonymous / 11/05/2010 at 5:09pm / United Kingdom (Birmingham) / Animals