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qr_fml
  • Town/Country : New york NY
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 697
  • Number of comments : 91
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 48 posted

About qr_fml : Dammit this site is just awesome!

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qr_fml's favorite FMLs

Today, I went into a public bathroom and walked in on a guy checking his butt out in the mirror to see if he'd wiped properly. FML

#17541030
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25573) - you deserved it (1769)

On 08/21/2011 at 8:03pm - misc - by Bobby ray slice - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I actually resorted to checking the newspaper obituaries to see where the deceased were employed, just so I can find a job opening. FML

#16922992
212 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29560) - you deserved it (3559)

On 06/30/2011 at 1:44pm - money - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Kansas)

Today, I walked around for hours with a post-it on my back reading "I JUST HAD SEX!" My boyfriend stuck it on me. FML

#16846296
203 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34258) - you deserved it (7405)

On 06/25/2011 at 4:39am - intimacy - by suxx - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was about to make love to my girlfriend at the local park when a cop caught us. I had to give him our information and hold a conversation with "Fire and Ice" lubricant on my penis. FML

#16724592
203 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13635) - you deserved it (50509)

On 06/18/2011 at 3:10am - intimacy - by Khrixas_069 - United States (California)

Today, my toilet decided it wouldn't take any more shit from me, and flooded the bathroom. FML

#16299538
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31241) - you deserved it (4718)

On 05/22/2011 at 4:31pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I grabbed my t-shirt off the floor beside the bed and got up to walk my boyfriends dog. After several trips around the block and plenty of strange looks I got back upstairs and saw the used condom stuck to my sleeve from the night before. FML

#16000939
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13639) - you deserved it (39315)

On 05/01/2011 at 4:20am - intimacy - by Username - United States

Today, my girlfriend kindly let me know that she didn't care that I am 'below average' in the penis department because it will leave her nice and tight for her next boyfriend. FML

#15948281
340 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63701) - you deserved it (7212)

On 04/27/2011 at 12:21pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom

Today, I promised my boyfriend a blow job every time he does the dishes. Every dish in the house has been washed three times already. FML

#15718627
304 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17005) - you deserved it (60902)

On 04/10/2011 at 1:07am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, as I walked home, I heard the people behind me in an argument over my gender. FML

#15451762
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37245) - you deserved it (9485)

On 03/23/2011 at 5:21pm - misc - by Cxisbest (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my father came over to my house. I realized there were condoms on the table, so I subtly moved a vase to hide them. He then gave me an unamused look and said "I know you have sex. You've been married for nine years. Grow the fuck up, dumbass." FML

#15356314
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15935) - you deserved it (77893)

On 03/17/2011 at 7:52pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my girlfriend thought it would be sexy to stick her finger up my ass during sex. I screamed like a little girl and barely managed to finish. Afterward, she said, 'Now you know how it feels.' FML

#15165919
339 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16512) - you deserved it (80487)

On 03/01/2011 at 6:51pm - intimacy - by Anon. (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I watched my grandfather try and park his car inside the storage area for shopping carts, thinking it was a parking space. FML

#14934394
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20336) - you deserved it (2748)

On 02/11/2011 at 10:46am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I had an asthma attack because I was masturbating too vigorously. FML

#14614726
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14479) - you deserved it (38235) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/17/2011 at 3:13pm - intimacy - by SkinsCastSelection - France - Chosen by the cast of Skins

Today, a woman came to my counter and ordered 12 donuts. I said, "OK sure, a dozen donuts." She paused, looked at me with disgust and yelled, "I said 12, NOT a dozen." FML

#14277072
294 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41442) - you deserved it (3371)

On 12/20/2010 at 8:52pm - work - by morenita27 (woman) - Canada

Today, was my first day at school. I got kicked out of the class for imitating a monkey. I wasn't imitating a monkey... I was laughing. FML

#13865567
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31326) - you deserved it (4472)

On 11/16/2010 at 2:17pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Israel (HaDarom)



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  • "If drawing stuff is the food of love, then get a better pencil." That's not a real expression, I just made it up because I needed a good opening line. It's not even that good of an opening line, but…

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