pyros

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Offline (the 09/06/2014 at 9:24am)

pyros

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 4827
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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pyros's page activity

Visits<b>Live4funny</b> - the 08/18/2014 at 4:31pm<b>TheManInWhiteXx</b> - the 05/19/2014 at 8:42am<b>Federgirl</b> - the 04/28/2014 at 12:58am<b>robsmit98</b> - the 04/23/2014 at 5:11pm<b>Fuaaad1994</b> - the 04/20/2014 at 10:21pm<b>Laxinitup</b> - the 04/18/2014 at 2:03am<b>S232Flash</b> - the 04/14/2014 at 6:33pm<b>LeeB</b> - the 04/12/2014 at 6:01am<b>omfgorlaith</b> - the 04/09/2014 at 3:03pm<b>colinlb</b> - the 04/06/2014 at 6:48pm<b>Victormoon</b> - the 04/03/2014 at 6:33pm<b>thatoneguy1369</b> - the 03/21/2014 at 2:07pm<b>Wolverine33</b> - the 03/18/2014 at 5:04pm<b>butthole321</b> - the 03/10/2014 at 10:27pm<b>15499kiwis</b> - the 02/26/2014 at 12:14am<b>SwimmingBassist</b> - the 02/25/2014 at 12:05am<b>alexmac222</b> - the 02/24/2014 at 1:56pm<b>crazy_maniac69</b> - the 02/23/2014 at 10:33pm

pyros's FML badges

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pyros's favorite FMLs

Today, was my first day as a male cheerleader in an attempt to flirt. The girls were stronger than me and it's now my job to be thrown in the air by girls. FML

by give me an F / 01/05/2014 at 11:16am / United Kingdom (Nottinghamshire) / Love

Today, my daughter started speaking with hashtags. I told her to knock it off, to which she replied, "You don't get it, mom - hashtag white girl probs." Hashtag FML

by Anonymous / 01/04/2014 at 1:06am / United States (California) / Kids

Today, like every other day for many years, I have a phobia of bananas. This evening, the phobia came to a head when I had a nightmare in which I was stabbed to death by a gang of walking bananas. FML

by Elisa_LmR / 01/03/2014 at 6:28pm / France / Miscellaneous

Today, while visiting my grandparents, my grandpa decided to explain to me the real reason that the old sofa I was sitting on had always been so discolored. He says they were bleach stains left while cleaning up the mess made during my father's conception. FML

by estranger / 01/03/2014 at 5:36pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I woke up to my girlfriend masturbating beside me. I asked if she needed a hand. She called me a pervert and now won't speak to me. FML

by notsohandy / 01/03/2014 at 5:08pm / Denmark (Midtjylland) / Intimacy

Today, I woke up hungover and with $13 stuffed in my bra. I'm not a stripper, and I'm not sure how it got there, but that's the most money I've had on me in weeks. FML

by Anonymous / 01/01/2014 at 12:47pm / United States (Connecticut) / Money

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me via text message. Every 20 minutes or so, I'll get a notification that I have a new message, and I check it just to find that same message sitting there. I'm being trolled by my own phone. FML

by Anonymous / 01/01/2014 at 2:49am / Australia (Queensland) / Love

Today, I was at work alone with a stomach bug. For some reason, our bathroom was out of toilet paper, so I had to quickly run to the nearest store to buy more, only to shit my pants midway there. I'm pretty sure the cashier knew exactly what had happened. FML

by Anonymous / 12/31/2013 at 1:22pm / United States (Alabama) / Work

Today, I was dressing in front of my boyfriend. He was looking at me in wonder and I assumed this was a good thing. Then he muttered, "God damn, you're awkwardly shaped." FML

by awkword / 12/31/2013 at 12:47pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Love

Today, I tried to prove to my girlfriend how much I've matured and that our relationship comes before anything else in my life. So I went to delete my character in World of Warcraft. I tried to confirm it, but I couldn't, breaking down in tears instead. FML

by Anonymous / 12/30/2013 at 12:20pm / United States / Love

Today, my 4-year-old daughter figured out how to set a parental code lock on our television so we can't watch football because it scares her when we scream. She won't tell us no matter what we bribe her with. FML

by Anonymous / 12/30/2013 at 7:10am / Australia (New South Wales) / Kids

Today, I have to take time off from work to take part in an intervention because my sister's obsession with the guy from Harry Potter has crossed over into illegality. FML

by LeaveHimAlone / 12/29/2013 at 11:23pm / United States (Maryland) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went to my bedroom for some alone time while my daughter watched TV. I didn't realize that my iPad was still connected to the Apple TV, until I hit play on some porn and heard a scream from the other room. FML

by ConfusedDad / 12/29/2013 at 2:01am / United States / Kids

Today, marks the third week since my sister's guinea pig learned to masturbate. He humps his wheel and makes squeaking noises for five minutes, then rolls over on his side and pants heavily. He does it at least twice a night while I'm trying to sleep. FML

by Anonomous / 12/28/2013 at 7:31pm / United States (Vermont) / Animals

Today, I went to a local bar for a speed dating event. The first person I hooked up with took one look at my face, burst into laughter, and walked out of the bar practically doubling over. FML

by Isitreallythatbad, / 12/22/2013 at 12:37am / United States / Miscellaneous