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purplestuff

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purplestuff
  • Town/Country : Birmingham, England
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 83804
  • Number of comments : 57
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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purplestuff's favorite FMLs

Today, I was watching Harry Potter. When all the students at Hogwarts started to clap at one point, I started clapping myself. FML

#2442795
249 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18674) - you deserved it (46624)

On 05/30/2009 at 7:48pm - misc - by whoahshloann (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I saw that Pixar had put out a teaser trailer for Toy Story 3. I got so excited to watch it that had to go lay in bed for a few minutes in order to calm myself down. I'm 19 years old. FML

#2406787
284 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17861) - you deserved it (41510)

On 05/29/2009 at 5:08pm - misc - by LALALALA (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I picked up my 4-year-old daughter from day care. As we're driving home, a butterfly lands on the windshield. Just as my daughter comments on how pretty the butterfly is, I turned a corner and accidentally hit the windshield wipers and smeared the pretty butterfly across the windshield. FML

#2405014
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39304) - you deserved it (8763)

On 05/29/2009 at 4:13pm - animals - by reb2632 (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, my last task for the day as a high school janitor was to power-wash the concrete area where the graduation ceremony will take place. Tired and bored, I drew a huge penis with the power hose. Right before I was going to wash it off, the machine broke. Graduation is tomorrow. FML

#2350763
250 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15007) - you deserved it (65108)

On 05/27/2009 at 7:10pm - work - by waterproblem (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I got a speeding ticket while driving to my court date for a prior speeding ticket. FML

#2311636
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11860) - you deserved it (99522)

On 05/26/2009 at 3:47pm - misc - by Wick (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex. Attempting to make things a little more exciting, I said in my sexiest voice "oh yeah, harder." My boyfriend who apparently doesn't like talking dirty, pulled out and angrily said "I was trying, what more do you want?" FML

#2308066
231 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67585) - you deserved it (17465)

On 05/26/2009 at 12:53pm - intimacy - by alexis89 (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my wife and I watched a documentary film about a kid living with severe asthma. In one scene, the kid has a severe asthma attack, and is rushed to hospital. My wife started laughing hysterically at this and after apologising, goes "it's just he sounded exactly like you in bed." FML

#2302795
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57971) - you deserved it (5766)

On 05/26/2009 at 4:24am - intimacy - by Weezylover (man) - United Kingdom (Manchester)

Today, I was lighting fireworks for my cousin's birthday in my Grandmother's yard. When it came time to light the "Grand Finale", I read on the outside of the box,"Face this side toward crowd for best result". After I lit it, I realized that it was on it's side. I shot 100 fireworks at my family. FML

#2252019
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10333) - you deserved it (51628)

On 05/24/2009 at 7:52pm - misc - by Tyler_Padgett (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was watching tv on the couch. My mom then kicked me off so she could lie down. Exhausted, I asked if I could sit at the end. She said no. A minute later she called the dog to come sit with her. As I was sitting on the ground, my mom told me to move because "the dog can't see the TV." FML

#2241699
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (68565) - you deserved it (3723)

On 05/24/2009 at 2:05pm - animals - by holly (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, after being diagnosed with cat allergies, I explained to my cat-loving boyfriend that the doctor strongly recommended not allowing the cat in the bedroom. At 1:30 am my boyfriend got out of the bed to go sleep in the spare room because: "the cat is sad." FML

#2209571
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48560) - you deserved it (7737)

On 05/23/2009 at 12:07pm - love - by Ames (woman) - United States (Alabama)

Today, I was telling my mother about my earrings hurting my ears. I had a cut on my ear close to the piercing and she thought that I had mistaken the cut for the opening, and said (as we walked past a car full of men), "Well of course it hurts when you put it in the wrong hole!". FML

#2045344
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61100) - you deserved it (6179)

On 05/18/2009 at 8:40am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Belfast)

Today, I got really excited at work over a deal I was about to close. I got up and started performing a rather obscene hip thrust only to notice a client sitting in the glass meeting room. FML

#2044978
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8368) - you deserved it (45869)

On 05/18/2009 at 8:04am - work - by hipthrustdude (man) - Malaysia (Kuala Lumpur)

Today, I was working at my job as cashier. This really attractive girl that comes in walked in, so I mustered up the courage to ask her out, by writing my number on a dollar bill. She pays and a dollar is her change. I go to hand her the money when she sees it and says, "Keep the change". FML

#2043522
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40897) - you deserved it (15495)

On 05/18/2009 at 4:45am - love - by oops (man) - United States (California)

Today, I went bowling. The guy at the lane next to us was bowling by himself and had a few of his own bowling balls, and he had one that looked like a yin-yang and it looked very cool spinning down the lane into the pins. Not really thinking, I casually said to him "Hey, I like your balls." FML

#2039933
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13305) - you deserved it (48703)

On 05/18/2009 at 1:12am - misc - by nothing (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I was walking home from piano lessons when I see my dad on a bike so I shout after him. He turns his head around and then runs into a tree. It wasn't my dad. FML

#2028672
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17283) - you deserved it (30324)

On 05/17/2009 at 8:35pm - misc - by Richocet - Canada (British Columbia)



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