About purplemnm : Serve the Horde, or be crushed beneath it.
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purplemnm's favorite FMLs
Today, I had to X-ray an 81 year old lady. The clothes she was wearing would show up on the X-ray so I had to make her change into a gown. I found out the hard way that 81 year olds still go commando. FML
by ugamayne / 02/17/2010 at 7:50am / United States (Maryland) / Work
by LoveDrug / 02/17/2010 at 5:49am / Ireland / Love
by Craig / 02/17/2010 at 1:30am / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous
Today, I found out my cousin - who suffers from bipolar disorder - shot herself in the chest and has only a 20 percent chance of living. I told my boyfriend, while crying, and he held me for a few minutes. As soon as I got quiet, he pulled out his iPhone and started playing a shooter game. FML
by lynn / 02/17/2010 at 1:30am / United States (Texas) / Love
Today, I was pulling a car out of the shop where I work, when I tried to go over a small snow bank to park it. What I didn't realize was the snow had turned into solid ice, and it broke the front bumper cover. It's going to cost $1000 to fix it and I also had to call the owner. FML
by sacredsilence29 / 02/16/2010 at 4:16pm / United States (Virginia) / Work
by Anonymous / 02/16/2010 at 3:48pm / United States (Alabama) / Miscellaneous
Today, I learned the reason they say don't keep your phone in high humidity places. I left my phone on the counter when I went to take a shower. It now won't turn on due to water damage and the warranty doesn't cover it. FML
by boo / 02/16/2010 at 3:46pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous
by soomeone / 02/16/2010 at 2:28pm / United States (California) / Love
by tacolove69 / 02/16/2010 at 2:20pm / United States (California) / Intimacy
Today, while working at my new job at a veterinary hospital, I was excited that I set a urinary catheter in a dog for the first time. I guess I was a little too enthusiastic though, because I pulled it out too fast and bloody urine splashed up all over my face. FML
by alex / 02/16/2010 at 11:43am / United States (Oklahoma) / Work
Today, I sat a client down for his haircut. He pulled off his hat and his hair was dripping wet. I asked him if he had just washed it. He responded, "No, but isn't it a hot day out?" No, it's twenty degrees and overcast today. FML
by kennarama / 02/16/2010 at 11:35am / United States (Wisconsin) / Work
by fmlpgh / 02/16/2010 at 6:51am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was docked and fined in my dorm building because of multiple noise complaints. What was I doing that was so noisy? I slipped in the shower and banged my head against the floor. Then when I reached for the towel rack to pull myself up, it broke and I slammed my wrist onto the ground. FML
by Anonymous / 02/16/2010 at 2:26am / United States (Georgia) / Health
Today, I had an interview for a college. The college is in Rhode Island. I live on the West coast. When I asked the interviewer if they got to the mainland by boat or by some other form of transportation, he told me Rhode Island is not an island. FML
by Anonymous / 02/16/2010 at 12:15am / United States (California) / Transportation
Today, like all days, my cat brought something to my doorstep. Usually it's a slew of dead mice; but today he decided to bring this big, ugly snake. I'm always the only one in my family 'brave' enough to go fetch our cat's gift. It took until lifting it up to realize the snake wasn't dead. FML
by Mary / 02/15/2010 at 7:08pm / United States (Delaware) / Animals
- 1Today, it's been six months since my husband and I have miscarried our daughter who we named Hana… 2Today, I got dumped for the second time by the guy that I'd been seeing. He actually forgot that… 3Today, I broke up with my boyfriend of almost 4 months. He was always worried I would cheat on him,…