About purplemnm : Serve the Horde, or be crushed beneath it.
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50 favourites
Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!
Today, as I was about to leave my house in my brand new heels, I stepped on a dead mouse. My heel went through it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23086) - you deserved it (4257)
On 02/17/2010 at 10:05am - misc - by juwkgo (woman) - United States (Florida)
Today, I had to X-ray an 81 year old lady. The clothes she was wearing would show up on the X-ray so I had to make her change into a gown. I found out the hard way that 81 year olds still go commando. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16328) - you deserved it (1939)
On 02/17/2010 at 7:50am - work - by ugamayne - United States (Maryland)
Today, I realised the only guy who is showing any slight interest in me is a Nazi-obsessed psychopath. He uses lovely pick up lines such as "Hey, do you know how much it hurts to staple your hand?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (19661) - you deserved it (1755)
On 02/17/2010 at 5:49am - love - by LoveDrug (woman) - Ireland
Today, I went to my hair dresser to get my haircut. When she asked me what I wanted, I told her "the usual". She confused me with another customer and gave me a mullet. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9709) - you deserved it (19641)
On 02/17/2010 at 1:30am - misc - by Craig (man) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I found out my cousin - who suffers from bipolar disorder - shot herself in the chest and has only a 20 percent chance of living. I told my boyfriend, while crying, and he held me for a few minutes. As soon as I got quiet, he pulled out his iPhone and started playing a shooter game. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30190) - you deserved it (2785)
On 02/17/2010 at 1:30am - love - by lynn (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I was pulling a car out of the shop where I work, when I tried to go over a small snow bank to park it. What I didn't realize was the snow had turned into solid ice, and it broke the front bumper cover. It's going to cost $1000 to fix it and I also had to call the owner. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9959) - you deserved it (6992)
On 02/16/2010 at 4:16pm - work - by sacredsilence29 (woman) - United States (Virginia)
Today, my pet rat had babies. We've only ever owned one rat. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20437) - you deserved it (4206)
On 02/16/2010 at 3:48pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Alabama)
Today, I learned the reason they say don't keep your phone in high humidity places. I left my phone on the counter when I went to take a shower. It now won't turn on due to water damage and the warranty doesn't cover it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (3715) - you deserved it (25866)
On 02/16/2010 at 3:46pm - misc - by boo (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I went to the movies with my girlfriend. I started putting my arm around her, when I hit her in the face. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8149) - you deserved it (15253)
On 02/16/2010 at 2:28pm - love - by soomeone - United States (California)
Today, I was late to dinner with my anal-retentive parents because my boyfriend was too busy making cock puppets in the shower to get ready to go. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8639) - you deserved it (1839)
On 02/16/2010 at 2:20pm - intimacy - by tacolove69 - United States (California)
Today, while working at my new job at a veterinary hospital, I was excited that I set a urinary catheter in a dog for the first time. I guess I was a little too enthusiastic though, because I pulled it out too fast and bloody urine splashed up all over my face. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5490) - you deserved it (19255)
On 02/16/2010 at 11:43am - work - by alex (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)
Today, I sat a client down for his haircut. He pulled off his hat and his hair was dripping wet. I asked him if he had just washed it. He responded, "No, but isn't it a hot day out?" No, it's twenty degrees and overcast today. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18439) - you deserved it (1528)
On 02/16/2010 at 11:35am - work - by kennarama (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)
Today, my husband told me to hold out my hand. He opened his, and in mine dropped a giant mutant tooth he had pulled a few months ago. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15100) - you deserved it (1902)
On 02/16/2010 at 6:51am - misc - by fmlpgh - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I was docked and fined in my dorm building because of multiple noise complaints. What was I doing that was so noisy? I slipped in the shower and banged my head against the floor. Then when I reached for the towel rack to pull myself up, it broke and I slammed my wrist onto the ground. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20107) - you deserved it (1664)
On 02/16/2010 at 2:26am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Georgia)
Today, I had an interview for a college. The college is in Rhode Island. I live on the West coast. When I asked the interviewer if they got to the mainland by boat or by some other form of transportation, he told me Rhode Island is not an island. FML
I agree, your life sucks (3128) - you deserved it (42311)
On 02/16/2010 at 12:15am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)
Monday 20 May 2013
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