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purplemnm

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purplemnm

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Friday 22 June 1990 (24 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 7431
  • Number of comments : 837
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 16 posted

About purplemnm : Serve the Horde, or be crushed beneath it.

purplemnm's page activity

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purplemnm's favorite FMLs

Today, I noticed my nephew has blue eyes, freckles and dimples which don't run in my family or my sister's husband's family, but they do run in my husband's family. FML

#19581290
324 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37060) - you deserved it (3701)

On 05/06/2012 at 9:53am - misc - by Damn (woman) - Australia

Today, I finally found out what the horrible smell at work was. A rat had decided to make its home in our emergency exit sign and had been fried by the electricity. I now have to fix this. Hello scorched dead rat. FML

#19569212
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20455) - you deserved it (1701)

On 05/03/2012 at 5:17pm - work - by Anonymous - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I spent hours baking an apple pie to impress my future mother-in-law. I was especially proud of the fact I'd made the crust and filling myself. When I served it to her, she picked off the crust and, between mouthfuls, bitched that it was nothing like canned pie filling. FML

#19501671
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23072) - you deserved it (1701)

On 04/20/2012 at 4:24pm - misc - by ohgodwhy (woman) - United States

Today, while vacuuming my new apartment, I farted a few times. After my last fart, I turned to find my super-hot neighbor standing at the door. Panicking, I asked in a "I-didn't-just-fart-my-ass" tone, "Oh hi! Been standing there for long?" She replied, "Since your initial rip." FML

#19489197
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24156) - you deserved it (5884)

On 04/18/2012 at 9:43am - misc - by Fartfail (man) - Hong Kong

Today, I have to follow through with the bet I lost over the Super Bowl game. I don't have a problem running a lap nude around my block, but the cops in the police station right across from my house probably will. FML

#19017961
211 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8986) - you deserved it (30177)

On 02/07/2012 at 12:58pm - misc - by MillyMan (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my boyfriend went and bought Skyrim, Modern Warfare 3 and renewed his WoW subscription. Looks like I won't be getting laid for a month or two. FML

#18273262
599 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43529) - you deserved it (11432)

On 11/17/2011 at 3:22pm - intimacy - by anonymous - Canada (Alberta)

Today, at a family reunion, my dad announced to everyone that I'd finally started my menstrual cycle. My grandmother started sobbing hysterically. FML

#17092331
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38688) - you deserved it (2644)

On 07/13/2011 at 9:31am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my mother started dating a man who insists people call him 'Panda'. FML

#17092208
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30557) - you deserved it (2793)

On 07/13/2011 at 9:11am - misc - by butimarealbear (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I found out my boyfriend can name each and every Pokémon, but can't remember my birthday. FML

#17090156
262 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35991) - you deserved it (8615)

On 07/13/2011 at 2:47am - love - by Ignored - United States (Texas)

Today, I was invited over to a dinner with the CEOs of my company, along with my two children. My 3 year-old asked loudly why we have two "nose holes", to which my 4 year-old son replied "So you can pick your nose and still breathe!" He then demonstrated. FML

#17088457
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30632) - you deserved it (6380)

On 07/13/2011 at 12:43am - kids - by ohno - United States (Colorado)

Today, my best friend told me to face my fear of cows and hop over the fence in with them. This resulted in me being chased by a raging cow, and thrusting myself head first over a fence. FML

#17087035
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20973) - you deserved it (13862)

On 07/12/2011 at 11:13pm - animals - by MooCow - United States (Montana)

Today, I was hanging out with a guy that I really like. When he gave me a hug goodbye, he slid his hand into the back pocket of my jeans. It was glorious until I farted on his hand. FML

#17080358
235 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38214) - you deserved it (21771)

On 07/12/2011 at 1:09pm - misc - by couldntholdit (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I took my mom to Victoria's Secret to help her find a bra. She made me try one on to see if it looked good on me. Turns out we have the same cup size. I'm a guy. FML

#17080127
271 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20007) - you deserved it (47716)

On 07/12/2011 at 12:45pm - misc - by sm702 - United States (Colorado)

Today, I moved into my new apartment. My neighbor is apparently crazy and thinks I'm trying to 'steal' her husband. She watches me and is super paranoid. I have a two year lease. FML

#17078615
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29028) - you deserved it (2801)

On 07/12/2011 at 9:34am - misc - by Ghettogirl4life - United States (Arizona)

Today, my dad thought it would be OK to make sound effects for everything he did, in a public park, with me tagging along behind. FML

#17078308
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22102) - you deserved it (3126)

On 07/12/2011 at 8:19am - kids - by SaggyBoy135 - United States (New Jersey)



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