About purplemnm : Serve the Horde, or be crushed beneath it.
purplemnm's FML badges
I moderated this!
In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!
Up and coming moderator
It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.
Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!
purplemnm's favorite FMLs
by Damn / 05/06/2012 at 9:53am / Australia / Miscellaneous
Today, I finally found out what the horrible smell at work was. A rat had decided to make its home in our emergency exit sign and had been fried by the electricity. I now have to fix this. Hello scorched dead rat. FML
by Anonymous / 05/03/2012 at 5:17pm / Australia (Queensland) / Work
Today, I spent hours baking an apple pie to impress my future mother-in-law. I was especially proud of the fact I'd made the crust and filling myself. When I served it to her, she picked off the crust and, between mouthfuls, bitched that it was nothing like canned pie filling. FML
by ohgodwhy / 04/20/2012 at 4:24pm / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, while vacuuming my new apartment, I farted a few times. After my last fart, I turned to find my super-hot neighbor standing at the door. Panicking, I asked in a "I-didn't-just-fart-my-ass" tone, "Oh hi! Been standing there for long?" She replied, "Since your initial rip." FML
by Fartfail / 04/18/2012 at 9:43am / Hong Kong / Miscellaneous
Today, I have to follow through with the bet I lost over the Super Bowl game. I don't have a problem running a lap nude around my block, but the cops in the police station right across from my house probably will. FML
by MillyMan / 02/07/2012 at 12:58pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous
by anonymous / 11/17/2011 at 3:22pm / Canada (Alberta) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 07/13/2011 at 9:31am / United States (Illinois) / Health
by butimarealbear / 07/13/2011 at 9:11am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
by Ignored / 07/13/2011 at 2:47am / United States (Texas) / Geek
Today, I was invited over to a dinner with the CEOs of my company, along with my two children. My 3 year-old asked loudly why we have two "nose holes", to which my 4 year-old son replied "So you can pick your nose and still breathe!" He then demonstrated. FML
by ohno / 07/13/2011 at 12:43am / United States (Colorado) / Kids
by MooCow / 07/12/2011 at 11:13pm / United States (Montana) / Animals
by couldntholdit / 07/12/2011 at 1:09pm / United States (California) / Love
by sm702 / 07/12/2011 at 12:45pm / United States (Colorado) / Miscellaneous
by Ghettogirl4life / 07/12/2011 at 9:34am / United States (Arizona) / Miscellaneous
by SaggyBoy135 / 07/12/2011 at 8:19am / United States (New Jersey) / Kids
- 1Today, my boyfriend said I didn't give him enough attention because of my busy work life. So… he… 2Today, someone stole my purse and phone while I was giving CPR to someone who had a heart attack on… 3Today, I was making the daily commute to work when suddenly my mother calls me, crying that there's…