purplebabytacos1

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Offline (the 01/05/2015 at 9:29am)

purplebabytacos1

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purplebabytacos1
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 26 March 1999 (17 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 4148
  • Number of comments : 25
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 20 posted

About purplebabytacos1 : I didn't exist in your world until you read this sentence of mine.

purplebabytacos1's page activity

Visits<b>Sonder</b> - the 12/04/2016 at 3:17pm<b>ughitseve</b> - the 11/18/2016 at 3:33pm<b>PepeLord</b> - the 07/28/2016 at 10:19pm<b>ebroks</b> - the 07/01/2016 at 5:45am<b>T_Rev1017</b> - the 06/23/2016 at 5:55pm<b>SiraSiemens</b> - the 06/15/2016 at 6:29am<b>jbuckets_404</b> - the 06/11/2016 at 3:10am<b>Helipilot86</b> - the 06/03/2016 at 10:25am<b>angrykid11</b> - the 04/14/2016 at 11:58pm<b>jill97</b> - the 03/14/2016 at 3:14pm<b>MissMayLaw001</b> - the 02/01/2016 at 6:41pm<b>SunshineBoy</b> - the 01/20/2016 at 3:55pm<b>ratman775</b> - the 11/11/2015 at 5:19pm<b>rabbiddog</b> - the 09/05/2015 at 12:33am<b>Bobegan</b> - the 08/10/2015 at 5:38pm<b>memed</b> - the 07/31/2015 at 5:27pm<b>savagetitan</b> - the 07/16/2015 at 9:02am<b>stevethellama</b> - the 07/05/2015 at 12:08am

Fucked!<b>jbuckets_404</b> - the 06/11/2016 at 10:32am<b>savagetitan</b> - the 07/16/2015 at 3:02pm<b>Devindelon</b> - the 12/20/2014 at 11:08pm<b>mikelaferte</b> - the 10/22/2014 at 4:38am<b>dying_to_know</b> - the 09/03/2014 at 9:11pm

purplebabytacos1's FML badges

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

See all of purplebabytacos1's badges

purplebabytacos1's favorite FMLs

Today, I woke up to my 7 year old son angrily trying to smother me with a pillow. FML

by Anonymous / 11/02/2014 at 2:47pm / Australia (Victoria) / Kids

Today, I stood up too quickly and got dizzy, so I sat on the edge of the bed to regain my balance. I started dozing off to sleep again, got confused, and peed down the side of my bed thinking I was on the toilet. FML

by Waterfalls / 10/07/2014 at 7:33am / United States (California) / Health

Today, I went into an exam room to do a check-up on one of my patients. I told the little girl's mother that she needed her flu shots. When the girl heard this, she took an apple out of her pocket and threw it at me. FML

by jazzie7719 / 09/28/2014 at 3:26pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Health

Today, my drunk husband came home, got into bed, and started humping the body pillow. He ended up whining about how I hadn't come yet, then angrily slurred that I must be cheating on him. All I could do was stay quiet and wonder how the idiot even made it home alive. FML

by tw@ / 09/28/2014 at 11:30am / United Kingdom (Hertford) / Intimacy

Today, I asked my 12-year-old son what he wanted for his birthday. He looked me dead in the eyes and said, "A whore." FML

by Anonymous / 09/26/2014 at 5:07pm / United States (Florida) / Intimacy

Today, I got back home from work and casually asked my dad "What's up?" He casually replied: "Wishing I'd had a son instead." and stared glassy-eyed at me until I left the room. FML

by Anonymous / 09/26/2014 at 4:00pm / United States (Illinois) / Kids

Today, I was asked to order a new lockable cash tin for work. When my boss returned to ask which one I'd selected, I said, "An 8-inch black one". Her giggle said it all. FML

by dicksonthebrain / 09/26/2014 at 9:03am / United Kingdom / Work

Today, my fiancé and I were having sex in the early hours of the morning. He said "Morning sex is the best thing to wake up to." Without thinking, I responded "Yeah, unless you're in prison." He lost his erection due to laughing so hard and now can't look at me without laughing. FML

by RuinedTheMood / 09/21/2014 at 1:11am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, my mother threw an egg at my face with force because I returned home 5 minutes late to dinner. FML

by pasquale / 09/20/2014 at 2:54am / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous

Today, I sat in on a university-level physics lecture, listening to my hyped-up co-students approximating the hypothetical situation of the Sun consisting of gerbils. The conversation then continued towards how much better energy/mass ratio the gerbil-sun would have compared to the actual star. FML

Today, I had to take my husband's laptop to University for an in-class exam. I opened the screen, and loud porn started to auto-play. The silence in the class was deafening as I tried to make it stop. FML

by Anonymous / 09/12/2014 at 9:17am / United States (Florida) / Intimacy

Today, I had to decline the sale of alcohol to a man who reeked of booze and was practically falling asleep at my till. He tried to convince me that he wasn't drunk, he was just blind. Still refusing to sell him the beer, he started yelling at me, accusing me of "being racist against the 'blinds'". FML

by PerfectVision / 09/11/2014 at 2:49am / United States (Washington) / Work

Today, a guy tried to pick me up with the line, "You're ugly. Just kidding. You're my date." FML

by thebigtwinkie / 09/10/2014 at 3:52am / Romania (Bucuresti) / Love

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I came home early to surprise my wife. No, it's not what you're thinking: I didn't find her cheating on me. She wasn't even home, but my dad was. He'd used his spare key and was on my sofa, drinking my beer and watching my TV. The first words out of his mouth? "Your beer's shit." FML

by Anonymous / 09/06/2014 at 5:08pm / New Zealand (Auckland) / Love

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend. She just grabbed the ring and said in a raspy voice, "My precious..." FML

by anonymous / 09/02/2014 at 2:58pm / United States (Connecticut) / Love