[fr]
[it]
[es2]
[tr]
[de]
[ru]
[se]

Submit your FML story

  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick :
Categories :
Man or woman?
Email notification?

punkysmalls

Search for a member

punkysmalls
  • Town/Country : Bay Area, USA
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 21 March 1988 (24 years)
  • Number of visits : 1157
  • Number of comments : 1
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

punkysmalls's last visitors

allison00maddogjESuS_lOVeS_mE69le_lauren

punkysmalls's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

punkysmalls's favorite FMLs

Today, I was stopped by a cop while walking down the street. He was slowly trailing me before pulling along side of me and asking how my night was going. He then said, "You know I can't let you do this. Know those new jeans you bought? The sticker is still on the leg" and drove off. FML

#5677989 (132)

I agree, your life sucks (6937) - you deserved it (22781)

On 10/06/2009 at 3:12am - misc - by limecat (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was walking to my friends Halloween themed birthday party in my zombie costume. Apparently, my crazy coke addicted neighbor found the costume too realistic. He tackled me. FML

#5620240 (150)

I agree, your life sucks (30702) - you deserved it (2462)

On 10/03/2009 at 11:34am - health - by Pwnedofthedead (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my husband and I were in bed, and just as I was about to finish he screamed, "Oh shit! It's 4:15, my strawberries are gonna whither!!!!" and then jumped off me and went to check on his farm on FarmVille. An imaginary farm, on Facebook. FML

#4679232 (289)

I agree, your life sucks (69265) - you deserved it (5383)

On 08/20/2009 at 10:51am - love - by demk (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my ex showed up at my door with chocolates and flowers. I've liked him since I was 13, starting dating him when I was 15. He proposed when I was 22. I am now 24, and yesterday was our wedding day. He didn't show. FML

#4644175 (134)

I agree, your life sucks (55503) - you deserved it (2469)

On 08/18/2009 at 11:59pm - love - by Wowfmylife (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I found out my husband had bought my 1-year-old daughter a shirt that says "Birth Control Fail" in pink glittery letters. He even took her out in it while I was at work. FML

#4525246 (217)

I agree, your life sucks (48209) - you deserved it (5287)

On 08/14/2009 at 12:57pm - kids - by ohgod (woman) - United States (Iowa)

Today, I crashed my car. I saw a deer getting ready to run into the middle of the road, and I was very sleepy, so I panicked and slammed on the brakes, causing me to lose control of the car on the wet road. After I hit a tree, I realized that the deer was a plastic lawn ornament. FML

#4468177 (98)

I agree, your life sucks (13764) - you deserved it (30469)

On 08/12/2009 at 2:49am - misc - by Bambi (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my boss called me into his office. He had a huge smile on his face, so I assumed I was going to get promoted. He then sat down, and told me that he had been sleeping with my wife for the last three months. He still had a huge smile on his face. FML

#4343153 (167)

I agree, your life sucks (48968) - you deserved it (1695)

On 08/06/2009 at 7:41pm - work - by smiletellsall (man) - United States (California)

Today, my cell phone was stolen. I work in a morgue. By myself. Obviously it wasn't stolen by any of those people. FML

#4154850 (116)

I agree, your life sucks (30930) - you deserved it (2792)

On 07/30/2009 at 4:58am - misc - by emily (woman) - United States (New York) - moderated by the Jackass crew

Today, I went to the beach. I was in the ocean and I looked over my shoulder and saw a big black spot. Knowing that there were big crabs on the beach, I screamed. Everyone in the water heard including the lifeguards. It turns out it was just my shadow. FML

#3921202 (69)

I agree, your life sucks (6357) - you deserved it (34150)

On 07/21/2009 at 1:32am - misc - by Thalassophobic (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my friend awoke me because I was talking in my sleep. When I asked her what I was talking about she replied with, "Let's just say you were having tea with the Queen of England. And a duck. You're really good at quacking." FML

#3799026 (108)

I agree, your life sucks (29658) - you deserved it (3551)

On 07/16/2009 at 10:59am - misc - by MadMax (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was in the gas station and I saw this creepy lady staring at me and smiling. She just didn't stop. I even gave an awkward wave to let her know that I saw her staring at me. Finally I decided to confront the woman, turns out the overly happy woman was a cardboard cut out FML

#3763600 (124)

I agree, your life sucks (9144) - you deserved it (44651)

On 07/15/2009 at 12:20am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I had to clean my walls with those Mr Clean Magic Sponges because we were having visitors. I got bored and started drawing penises with it because they would leave wet marks. There is nothing magic about how slow they dry when your visitors come an hour early. They saw all ten of them. FML

#3723567 (126)

I agree, your life sucks (6084) - you deserved it (44376)

On 07/13/2009 at 6:18pm - misc - by iJehx (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, as I was bent over at my waitressing job an elderly woman walked by and smacked my ass. I looked at her, shocked, and she said, "It was too tempting with you bent over like that, I have a dirty old mind." I didn't know whether to be flattered or horrified. Maybe both. FML

#3661940 (148)

I agree, your life sucks (36287) - you deserved it (4396)

On 07/11/2009 at 5:10am - work - by grannysmack (woman) - United States (Iowa)

Today, I was in charge of throwing a party for my mom. I told my little brother he was suppose to blow up the balloons which were in my dresser. Apparently, he accidentally found all my condoms, unknowingly, and decorated the house in prophylactics instead of balloons. Happy Birthday, Mom. FML

#3556945 (110)

I agree, your life sucks (36774) - you deserved it (18683)

On 07/07/2009 at 3:43pm - intimacy - by Ryan (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was walking on a path through a park by myself. I glanced at the ground and saw a shadow behind me. Thinking of an attacker, I screamed as loud as I could and began flailing my arms to ward him off. Turns out, it was a jogger. He had to stop due to his uncontrollable laughter. FML

#2649932 (174)

I agree, your life sucks (8824) - you deserved it (35337)

On 06/06/2009 at 12:43am - misc - by paranoid (woman) - United States (Georgia)



Your account

Sign up - Password?
→ Illustrated FMLs
→ The blog
+ FML, the follow-up
↓ Categories

FML's blog

05/15/2012

The whole blog

Switch to FML for visually impaired

FMyLife, world tour

Available on:

© 2008-2012 by