prettychic2001

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prettychic2001

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 793
  • Number of comments : 1
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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prettychic2001's page activity

Visits<b>andrewfromsocal</b> - the 02/12/2016 at 2:06am<b>The_Avatar</b> - the 01/29/2016 at 1:19pm<b>bulletsinthewind</b> - the 12/13/2015 at 2:13am<b>mauguster</b> - the 11/25/2015 at 3:50pm<b>LittleRed79</b> - the 10/06/2015 at 9:45pm<b>MxAxRxCxO</b> - the 02/03/2014 at 12:22pm<b>TheImaginarySong</b> - the 01/20/2014 at 1:40pm<b>challan</b> - the 12/21/2013 at 6:45pm<b>joea21</b> - the 12/18/2013 at 8:37pm<b>lamalie</b> - the 12/18/2013 at 5:54pm<b>ZY1431</b> - the 12/16/2013 at 7:15am<b>bigtrucker</b> - the 11/16/2013 at 12:33am<b>muzicizlife2012</b> - the 11/11/2013 at 4:09pm<b>lmo98</b> - the 11/10/2013 at 12:21am<b>trex83</b> - the 10/31/2013 at 6:04pm<b>raeeheller</b> - the 10/31/2013 at 11:57am<b>Broadway_Vayne</b> - the 10/31/2013 at 9:26am<b>MissJennyale</b> - the 10/29/2013 at 9:06pm

prettychic2001's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

The Thumb strikes back

You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.

See all of prettychic2001's badges

prettychic2001's favorite FMLs

Today, I asked my husband to try a little foreplay for once, instead of just rushing into sex. His idea of foreplay was to sweetly whisper that he was going to "penis" me so hard. That's the first time I've heard the word "penis" used as a verb, and hopefully the last. FML

by Anonymous / 12/27/2013 at 5:39pm / United Kingdom / Intimacy

Today, my husband was getting undressed. I told my 2-year-old daughter not to go in our bedroom because he was undressing in there. I turned my back and she instantly ran off to my bedroom. I heard her shout "I can see daddy's tail!" Now, she points to everyone's crotch and shouts "TAIL!" FML

by KittyKat / 11/03/2013 at 9:22am / United Kingdom (Milton Keynes) / Kids

Today, I asked my boyfriend about his views on personal growth. He replied, "What, you mean dick size?" FML

by what / 09/25/2013 at 10:42am / Canada (Alberta) / Intimacy

Today, I was watching a movie on TV. One of the characters has the same name as my dog, and when his name was called, my dog got so excited that he jumped face-first into my TV. FML

by ugh Buck! / 09/11/2013 at 12:57pm / United States / Animals

Today, my best friend confessed to me that she's a lesbian. She quickly added, "Oh, don't worry, I don't like you. You're not attractive." FML

by ...thanks / 09/07/2013 at 10:17am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, a shopper asked me where my nipples were. Seeing as I work in Babies'R'Us, this is a common question. I brought her over to the nursing equipment aisle where she then grabbed my nipples, gave them a twist, and walked away. I need a new job. FML

by NotGabe / 09/01/2013 at 10:25am / United States (Texas) / Work

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I found out that my grandma is a well-loved member of a notorious biker gang. Meanwhile, I'm a 32-year-old, single, minimum-wage nobody with no friends to speak of. She's probably getting more action than I ever will. FML

by no life to fuck :/ / 08/30/2013 at 7:37pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I actually had to explain to my husband why his habit of wiping his boogers off into our baby's hair has to stop. FML

by grossedout / 08/29/2013 at 12:26pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was visiting my cousin's farm. Going out for a morning stroll, I took an apple with me to munch along the way. As I was eating it, I heard a distant thumping sound and was suddenly slammed into the ground. When I looked up, a horse was eating my apple. I got mugged by a horse. FML

by Anonymous / 08/14/2013 at 5:11am / United States (Florida) / Animals

Today, I had my first wet dream. I woke up sweating and soaking wet. Too bad I dreamed about having intense sex with a cardboard box. FML

by Anonymous / 07/31/2013 at 12:28pm / Belgium (West-Vlaanderen) / Intimacy

Today, I had to pull one of those toy stretchy hands out of my dog's butthole. It slapped me in the face when I finally got it out. FML

by anonymous / 07/17/2013 at 12:48am / United States (Texas) / Animals

Today, my 16-year-old son broke two of his fingers playing with Play-Doh. FML

by Anonymous / 06/19/2013 at 12:12pm / United States (New York) / Kids

Today, I was in a big Skype chat, which somehow turned into a heated argument. My friend lost it, typed "your stupid" and called me a "looser." When I pointed out the irony of his messages, he rage-quit, drove all the way to my house, and punched me in the face at the door. FML

by -1 friend / 05/17/2013 at 5:16pm / United States (Florida) / Health

Today, I dressed up as Batman for a comic book convention. I was hit by a car on the way there by a man dressed up as the Joker for the same convention. FML

by ironies a b*tch / 04/13/2013 at 1:04am / United States (Illinois) / Transportation

Today, I shaved my pubic area for my fiancé. He told me it looked "like Frodo tried to hack off Gandalf's beard with Gimli's ax." FML

by dancekat / 04/08/2013 at 5:17am / United States (Washington) / Intimacy

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.