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preacher09

Offline (the 09/27/2014 at 4:56am) | Search for a member

preacher09

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Friday 20 January 1995 (19 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1626
  • Number of comments : 1
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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preacher09's page activity

Visits<b>THEGREATROBERT</b> - the 03/15/2014 at 10:16am<b>Zoeythedinosaur</b> - the 02/16/2014 at 1:32pm<b>AdrianG</b> - the 01/23/2014 at 4:25am<b>10nachoman10</b> - the 12/08/2013 at 11:00am<b>jillytc</b> - the 11/16/2013 at 4:47pm<b>jadeluv</b> - the 10/01/2013 at 2:39pm<b>mooseapoo12</b> - the 09/08/2013 at 5:25pm<b>Tempted1</b> - the 09/08/2013 at 4:02pm<b>olpally</b> - the 08/25/2013 at 3:34pm<b>hellokittyxxx</b> - the 06/16/2013 at 5:25pm<b>Wizardo</b> - the 06/14/2013 at 4:47pm<b>1PersonIsMyWorld</b> - the 06/08/2013 at 12:49pm<b>MOLLMcAWESOME</b> - the 06/04/2013 at 6:15am<b>Welshite</b> - the 05/24/2013 at 4:54pm<b>pumboc</b> - the 05/24/2013 at 9:34am

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preacher09's favorite FMLs

Today, while working at Home Depot, a customer tried to engage me in a conversation about which gardening tool would "hypothetically" be the best to kill his wife with. FML

#21132614
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43022) - you deserved it (3487)

On 05/06/2014 at 6:47pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Nevada)

Today, I got a new dentist. You know how most dentists play soft, relaxing music? Well this guy seems to like rap a lot, and it's kinda hard getting your teeth cleaned to the sound of bullets going off. FML

#21131626
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38766) - you deserved it (4262)

On 05/05/2014 at 5:51pm - health - by randomusername99 - United States (New York)

Today, I started going on and on about dogs and their different types of breed, behaviours, expectancy, etc. When someone asked me how I know all this stuff, I meant to say, "I fucking love animals", I didn't think it through and said, "I love fucking animals". FML

#21131182
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (437) - you deserved it (18908)

On 05/05/2014 at 3:53am - intimacy - by Zekrome - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my boyfriend told me he wanted to drive to India. Thinking he meant Indiana, I said sure, knowing I have friends there. He said, "Bangladesh, India, here we come!" He was serious. FML

#21128139
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36760) - you deserved it (6587)

On 05/01/2014 at 5:29pm - misc - by GAGirl1 (woman) - United States

Today, I decided to face one of my fears. I've never had a birthday party, out of fear that nobody would come. I sent out a mass text inviting people out for my birthday, trying to sound casual. The only replies I received were along the lines of "Who the hell's this?" FML

#21127076
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38758) - you deserved it (4209)

On 04/30/2014 at 10:52am - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Alberta)

Today, while at a restaurant with my husband for our 4-year anniversary, he kept behaving strangely, breathing deeply and eventually sighing happily. I thought the wine had just gone to his head. Nope; he proudly admitted later that he'd jerked off without anyone noticing, even me. FML

#21126320
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43612) - you deserved it (4984)

On 04/29/2014 at 2:48pm - misc - by god (woman) - United Kingdom (West Lothian)

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend of three years. I worked my ass off planning everything down to a T. It seemed perfect, until I actually proposed, at which point I was rejected and dumped, in front of my family, friends and two coworkers. FML

#21126146
230 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49604) - you deserved it (5250)

On 04/29/2014 at 10:18am - love - by willstaysingle (man) -

Today, I am on vacation in Dubai with my dad and a few of his friends. I thought we were going to travel and see some amazing things, but I'm confined to my hotel room while everyone drinks and watches Family Guy. FML

#21123610
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40687) - you deserved it (4330)

On 04/26/2014 at 4:05pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Arab Emirates (Dubai)

Today, my little brother put a battery to my tongue while I was sleeping with my mouth open. The shock found its way right to my metal filling. FML

#21123309
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41743) - you deserved it (3593)

On 04/26/2014 at 7:36am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Georgia)

Today, the man sitting next to me on the train tried to sneak a dead cat into my bag while I was sleeping. FML

#21121912
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42552) - you deserved it (3543)

On 04/24/2014 at 4:52pm - animals - by now have a cat - United States (Illinois)

Today, I locked myself out of my dorm room. I walked across campus, shoe-less and in nothing but my bathrobe, to find someone who could let me back in. Turns out I hadn't even shut the door properly and so it never actually locked. I can still hear the guy laughing at me. FML

#21120721
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34701) - you deserved it (12587)

On 04/23/2014 at 10:54am - misc - by killmenow (woman) - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I was at the sandwich shop I work in. A customer came in and requested an assorted sub. As I finished putting on the sauces, I looked up to see the customer's face set in horror. Apparently I didn't notice that I licked my fingers clean after getting some mayonnaise on them. FML

Today, I walked in on my son holding a lighter to the end of a pen and sniffing the fumes. Apparently he thought it would get him high. FML

#21119972
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36748) - you deserved it (4707)

On 04/22/2014 at 2:59pm - kids - by wah wah "you raised him" (man) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend's parents' parrot won't stop imitating my sex moans, and keeps doing it whenever I speak. FML

#21119041
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51806) - you deserved it (14515)

On 04/21/2014 at 2:42pm - intimacy - by sexual parrot -

Today, my drug addict of a roommate convinced herself my red kitten was Pennywise the clown in disguise waiting to kill her, and hit him over the head with a pan. FML



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