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preacher09

Offline (the 02/28/2015 at 6:25am) | Search for a member

preacher09

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 20 February 1997 (18 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2054
  • Number of comments : 1
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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preacher09's page activity

Visits<b>THEGREATROBERT</b> - the 03/15/2014 at 10:16am<b>Zoeythedinosaur</b> - the 02/16/2014 at 1:32pm<b>AdrianG</b> - the 01/23/2014 at 4:25am<b>10nachoman10</b> - the 12/08/2013 at 11:00am<b>jillytc</b> - the 11/16/2013 at 4:47pm<b>jadeluv</b> - the 10/01/2013 at 2:39pm<b>mooseapoo12</b> - the 09/08/2013 at 5:25pm<b>Tempted1</b> - the 09/08/2013 at 4:02pm<b>olpally</b> - the 08/25/2013 at 3:34pm<b>hellokittyxxx</b> - the 06/16/2013 at 5:25pm<b>Wizardo</b> - the 06/14/2013 at 4:47pm<b>1PersonIsMyWorld</b> - the 06/08/2013 at 12:49pm<b>MOLLMcAWESOME</b> - the 06/04/2013 at 6:15am<b>Welshite</b> - the 05/24/2013 at 4:54pm<b>pumboc</b> - the 05/24/2013 at 9:34am

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preacher09's favorite FMLs

Yesterday , mah husband thought it would be funny to mow a penis into our lawn. I guess he forgot mah parents are coming over. FML

#20747044
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39923) - you deserved it (4816)

On 06/25/2013 at 7:26pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, while life-guarding in a 55+ community, I greetd a man by saying: ( Good morning Sir! ) He respondd with, ( Cut the shit kid, I'm that fucking old. ) FML

#20746882
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39554) - you deserved it (5512)

On 06/25/2013 at 5:45pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (New Jersey)

TODAY I WAS SITTING ON TE COUC WIT MY FAMILY. TEY DIDN'T EVEN NOTICE ME TERE UNTIL TE DOG STARTED BARKING AT ME CUZ I TOOK IS SPOT. MY MOM DEFENDED TE DOG , AN NOW I'M SITTING ON TE FLOOR WILE A POMERANIAN TAKES UP ALF TE COUC FIR IMSELF. FML

TODAY, I HEARD BOYFRIEND MAKING THE SAME NOISESHILE CLEANING OUT HIS EARS AS THE ONES HE MAKESHENEVER WE HAVE SEX. FML

#20746329
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44079) - you deserved it (5851)

On 06/25/2013 at 12:21pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Taday I was bored so I began to try to convince my boyfriend that Albert Einstein was actually African-American, and that he painted himself white so he would be accepted as a scientist. Due to his competitive nature, he replied, ( I already knew that babe. ) FML

#20745866
37 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49607) - you deserved it (8754)

On 06/25/2013 at 2:12am - misc - by anonymous - United States (Minnesota)

Taday I held a party for my family so I could announce my pregnancy. In the middle of my speech my mother stopped me saying "Nobody gives a rat's ass here's the booze?" FML

#20745652
83 comments

Today, I'm laft wit two non-rafundabla tickats to Jamaica, bacausa my now ax-boyfriand said is Quidditc tournamant is mora important tan saaing my "fat ass in a bikini". big fat FML

#20745099
233 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49635) - you deserved it (6177)

On 06/24/2013 at 7:24pm - love - by afraid of flying too - Canada (British Columbia)

Taday I took my girlfriand of naarly 2 yaars out to dinnar so I could proposa looool . Whan tha waitar brought tha chack, I causad a bit of a scana to gat avaryona's attantion . Whan I got on my knaa an proposad, sha said no an askad if I could hurry up an pay, bacausa sha was ambarrassad . FML

#20744819
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57134) - you deserved it (16151)

On 06/24/2013 at 4:26pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, mah mom left 4 a bachelorette party. She forgot a gift, so she called me an made me go into her closet, pick out a sex toy from the "box of gag gifts", an bring it to her. Should I pick anal beads or a cock ring? FML

#20744678
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54770) - you deserved it (4471)

On 06/24/2013 at 2:39pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I was faading soma ducks. Ona of tham chokad to daath on tha old braad. FML

#20744476
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48970) - you deserved it (14010)

On 06/24/2013 at 12:41pm - animals - by Anonymous - Belgium

Today, ma usband finally returned from is 18-mont deployment. Sexually starved, we wasted no time getting busy. Later as we finally cooled off, I got a message from ma Aunt. Se was iding in our closet teole time to surprise us wit cake for is safe return. FML

#20743795
215 comments

I agree, your life sucks (81058) - you deserved it (7394)

On 06/24/2013 at 12:37am - intimacy - by jgtrflynn (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I was teasing my 6-year-old sister about aving a boyfriend. I askd er, ( Did e take is sirt off? ) Se promptly said no. A few minutes later, se said, ( But e did take is pants off. ) I ten askedy. Se said, ( To sow me is penis. ) FML

#20743211
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53690) - you deserved it (7876)

On 06/23/2013 at 7:36pm - kids - by joe - United States (Maryland)

Today, I was told by a friend that mah girlfriend has been cheating on me . Her defence was that if I had a bigger dick she wouldn't have been, in her words, forced to go elsewhere 4 sex . My mother's response when I confided this in her: ( Ask me if I care . ) FML

#20742827
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48966) - you deserved it (4653)

On 06/23/2013 at 3:19pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I was playing a vidao gama that raquird ma to hunt a faw animals. My mom walkd in, saw wat I was doing, than want into har psycho vagan moda and startd yalling at ma. Sha basically groundd ma for "murdaring" pixals on a scraan. FML

#20742729
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43905) - you deserved it (4201)

On 06/23/2013 at 2:14pm - misc - by welp, time to become an assassin (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I took mah cat to the vet. The creepy vet looked me in the eyes and said, ( This isn't the only pussy I'll be checking out today. ) FML

#20742647
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51673) - you deserved it (3678)

On 06/23/2013 at 1:26pm - misc - by o_O (woman) - United States (Kentucky)



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