poradora

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poradora

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 67
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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poradora's FML badges

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

poradora's favorite FMLs

Today, I went on a blind date. He took one look at me and said, "Well, we might as well get a drink anyway." FML

by dateless / 09/21/2012 at 7:48am / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Love

Today, my best friend threw my football over a wall, so we hopped over to go and get it. Next thing we know, we're both surrounded by men pointing guns in our faces. FML

by Anonymous / 11/01/2011 at 5:03am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, two Jehovah's Witnesses rang my doorbell for the 10th time. This time they asked me whether I knew Faith's greatest enemy. I replied, "Basic reasoning?" A copy of The Watchtower can really hurt when it hits you in the eye. FML

by Goaway / 08/14/2011 at 7:20am / United States (Connecticut) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend and I were playing around. He threw me over his shoulder and turned around, smacking my face against the wall. Then he smacked my head into the fridge after turning round to see "what that loud bang" was. FML

by anonymous / 12/18/2010 at 4:11am / United States (South Carolina) / Love

Today, I was home alone in the shower when in the opening of the curtain, I could see a man in a ski mask. I passed out, hit my head on the tub. I then found out it was my dad pulling a prank on me. I almost died cause my dad wanted to see me scream like a girl. FML

by dfan13 / 07/01/2009 at 12:31pm / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I was talking to this guy that I like a lot and I think he likes me back. When he told me I was beautiful I laughed so hard that I farted. Loudly. FML

by ECullen / 05/21/2009 at 3:13pm / United States (Florida) / Love

Today, I had drunk sex with a girl that I barely know. I didn't have a condom and was nervous about getting her pregnant, but she assured me that I could pull out. Right when I was about to pull out, she wrapped her legs around me and yelled, "BE MY BABY'S DADDY!" I couldn't get out in time. FML

by RC3Welly / 03/09/2009 at 6:58pm / United States (Florida) / Intimacy

Today, I got up at 5am, brushed my teeth, shaved and showered to get ready for work only to step barefoot in a huge pile of dog crap in the middle of my living room floor. I don't own a dog. FML

by RustyBulletHole / 02/04/2009 at 2:53am / United States (Illinois) / Animals