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How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, I was introduced to my future stepmother, but it turns out that I already know her. Not only are we the same age and went to the same high school, when we were in the same math class together the teacher would often confuse our names because "we could pass as twins". FML
I agree, your life sucks (56278) - you deserved it (1937)
On 08/06/2009 at 4:45am - misc - by whatismydadthinking (woman) - Australia (Australian Capital Territory)
Today, I woke up from a night of crazy drunken sex with a guy I had met at a friends 23rd birthday party. The lights had been off when we had stumbled in to his house the night before. When I opened my eyes today, the first thing I saw was his family picture, complete with his wife and son. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13984) - you deserved it (45872)
On 08/01/2009 at 9:44am - intimacy - by homewrecker (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, my friends had ditched me for a party I hadn't been invited to so I was sitting home alone. The only other thing in my house was the mosquito I nicknamed Fred. I liked to watch Fred fly around and try to suck my blood. 20 minutes later, I found Fred's dead body. I was actually sad. FML
I agree, your life sucks (49644) - you deserved it (13466)
On 07/30/2009 at 10:43am - animals - by dumbo (man) - United States (Virginia) - moderated by the Jackass crew
Today, my cell phone was stolen. I work in a morgue. By myself. Obviously it wasn't stolen by any of those people. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32854) - you deserved it (3439)
On 07/30/2009 at 4:58am - misc - by emily (woman) - United States (New York) - moderated by the Jackass crew
Today, I had two minutes to get to the bus stop which usually takes me eight minutes. I had to catch that bus to be at work at the hospital in time. I was in such a hurry, I didn't have the time to tie my shoe laces. I ran with untied shoe laces. I did end up in the hospital. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27964) - you deserved it (10008)
On 07/28/2009 at 2:59pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Norway (Finnmark)
Today, I found out that my husband made a replica of our family on The Sims 3. I also found out he killed me off a couple weeks ago and made a new wife, KiKi. FML
I agree, your life sucks (51637) - you deserved it (4152)
On 07/26/2009 at 12:28am - love - by nosrepamai82 (woman) - United States (Florida)
Today, I passed a homeless person asking for change. When I politely apologized and told him I had none, he yelled angrily "who comes to this city without money?" I replied "apparently, you do." Wrong answer. He followed me, now screaming. FML
I agree, your life sucks (39030) - you deserved it (20648)
On 07/25/2009 at 12:39pm - money - by re2K5 (man) - Korea Republic of (Kyongsang-bukto)
Today, I moved into university residence, looking forward to finally being able to come out of the closet. I started chatting with the hot guy moving in next door to me. He said I was cool, and he was glad because he was afraid he'd be living next to a gay guy. FML
I agree, your life sucks (42982) - you deserved it (7918)
On 07/23/2009 at 6:09pm - love - by simon (man) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, my coworkers decided to play a game of "Who Can Piss the Boss Off the Most". I opted not to play, but I still won. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38353) - you deserved it (3885)
On 07/22/2009 at 5:09pm - work - by PokeTheBear (man) - Canada
Today, I woke up feeling a tingling sensation on my testicles. I enjoyed it for a few seconds, then threw off the covers. Looks like there have been cockroaches in my bed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (46242) - you deserved it (8552)
On 07/18/2009 at 6:48am - misc - by fartypeepee (man) - Australia (Queensland)
Today, my neighbor confessed to me that he was homophobic and regrets that his family doesnt know it. He spent fifteen minutes explaining how much he would hate to have a gay child. I spent two hours last night convincing his son that it was the right thing to tell his family he was gay. FML
I agree, your life sucks (44273) - you deserved it (3593)
On 07/15/2009 at 3:33pm - misc - by mook (man) - United States (Wisconsin)
Today, I have to choose between one eyebrow or none because I'm a heavy sleeper and my brother is a moron. FML
I agree, your life sucks (51289) - you deserved it (3609)
On 07/11/2009 at 4:02pm - misc - by wow (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I was taking a shower and I saw a new body wash that said "radiance ribbons." That sounded a little effeminate, but it smelled manly enough and the only alternative was normal soap, so I used it. Just now, I stepped out into the sun and found out what "radiance ribbons" means. I sparkle. FML
I agree, your life sucks (52495) - you deserved it (24845)
On 07/10/2009 at 1:03pm - misc - by takinabreak (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I snuck into my brother's room to scare him. Just as I was about to go for it, his girlfriend calls. I had to sit there motionless listening to my brother having phone sex, then wait for him to go to sleep and sneak back out to pretend it never happened. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18000) - you deserved it (43095)
On 07/10/2009 at 1:27am - intimacy - by fmlfmlfml (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, my boss walked in my office to see me busy making a little Post-it dress for my pen. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9585) - you deserved it (40113)
On 07/09/2009 at 12:27pm - misc - by Anonymous - France (Midi-Pyrenees)
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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