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  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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plora0304

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plora0304
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  • Number of visits : 262
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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plora0304's favorite FMLs

Today, when done feeding my newborn, I stated to my husband that I'm a cow. He said, in a sincere tone, "Oh, baby, you'll lose the weight soon." I meant cow because I'm producing so much milk. FML

#1987412 (149)

I agree, your life sucks (39658) - you deserved it (14420)

On 05/16/2009 at 5:41pm - love - by Heifer (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, my best friend got a new boyfriend. She asked him what he wanted for his upcoming birthday, and he said he just wanted to hang out with her and watch a movie or two. I thought it was sweet, so I asked my boyfriend what he would like for his upcoming birthday. He said a blow job. FML

#1955875 (308)

I agree, your life sucks (19248) - you deserved it (32057)

On 05/15/2009 at 1:44am - intimacy - by badboyfriends (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend was continuously telling me how great my bestfriend smelled the other night and how I should wear some perfume that smelled like that. I have the same exact perfume and have been wearing it for months. FML

#1870667 (119)

I agree, your life sucks (56379) - you deserved it (2665)

On 05/12/2009 at 11:22am - love - by badboyfriend101 - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I decided I didn't care about my pride, and so I asked this girl out in a text. After an hour of no responce I asked again. Later I got a text saying, "I'm sorry, This is Emily's mom. Emily isn't here at the moment, but if I were you, I wouldn't ask again." I was rejected by her mom. FML

#1858879 (183)

I agree, your life sucks (41980) - you deserved it (11290)

On 05/11/2009 at 9:25pm - love - by ConnorFails (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I flew to see my long distance boyfriend who I haven't seen in 6 months. Upon seeing me, he ran up to me, picked me up and swung me around like they do in the movies. In doing so, my foot hit a 4 year old child who was running past and knocked him out. FML

#1815413 (218)

I agree, your life sucks (62629) - you deserved it (6186)

On 05/10/2009 at 2:49pm - love - by airport (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was talking to my boyfriend on the phone. After a short pause I hear him say "I love you." Smiling I say, "I love you too." Then he says, "I was talking to my dog." FML

#1713391 (120)

I agree, your life sucks (46670) - you deserved it (3937)

On 05/07/2009 at 8:39am - love - by TrulyYours (woman) - United States (Maine)

Today, my dad texted me and told me "I love u." I answer back with "I love you too dad...are you drunk?" and he answers back "Of course I am..." My dad only tells me he loves me when he's drunk. FML

#1696810 (161)

I agree, your life sucks (54907) - you deserved it (3369)

On 05/06/2009 at 6:04pm - love - by thatonekid (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, it was my boyfriend's 21st birthday. Along with a pair of $80 shoes, I bought him a birthday cake, his favorite ice cream and a $15 balloon. I showed up to the party and he was very intoxicated. So intoxicated that he pops the balloon, drops the cake, and throws up all over his new shoes. FML

#1589667 (210)

I agree, your life sucks (53023) - you deserved it (5742)

On 05/03/2009 at 11:22am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my boyfriend was going to propose. Since he was really nervous, he decided to have a couple of drinks to loosen up. He ended up throwing up and passing out before he could get down on one knee. FML

#1358275 (119)

I agree, your life sucks (43791) - you deserved it (3198)

On 04/26/2009 at 3:12pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States



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