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Offline (the 09/06/2014 at 7:42pm)



  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 13 November 1986 (29 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 571
  • Number of comments : 34
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About pita1331 : Just your average girl who enjoys the little things in life and finding humor in most things

pita1331's page activity

Visits<b>jbuckets_404</b> - the 09/16/2016 at 9:59am<b>vaas90</b> - the 09/13/2016 at 7:46am<b>big_sam1991</b> - the 08/13/2016 at 1:20am<b>lost7702</b> - the 07/14/2016 at 1:35pm<b>BurlesonWrath</b> - the 04/25/2016 at 10:07am<b>jeff_zz</b> - the 04/10/2016 at 11:39am<b>brokenmirrors</b> - the 03/20/2016 at 12:49am<b>172pilot</b> - the 07/11/2015 at 2:05pm<b>b_mad</b> - the 05/20/2015 at 4:24am<b>joshtapp</b> - the 01/30/2015 at 9:03pm<b>OGCxILLUSION</b> - the 12/30/2014 at 3:29pm<b>f36k</b> - the 10/26/2014 at 2:41pm<b>abattior</b> - the 08/31/2014 at 10:40pm<b>FenrirTheUnbound</b> - the 07/31/2014 at 8:43pm<b>FrenchMixer</b> - the 06/10/2014 at 3:40am<b>fml_ydi79</b> - the 06/05/2014 at 11:31am<b>Bafrinn</b> - the 05/29/2014 at 8:23pm<b>PharmGirl14</b> - the 05/29/2014 at 11:05am

pita1331's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

See all of pita1331's badges

pita1331's favorite FMLs

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend with a ring from Kay Jewelers. She saw the box, started giggling, whispered, "'Kay", and then started laughing so hard at her joke she had to excuse herself. FML

by very punny / 09/02/2014 at 11:18pm / United States (Maryland) / Love

Today, my boyfriend called me in tears, convinced that he found me in a porn video online. It wasn't me. And when I finally got him to give me the web address, I too started crying at the realization of how fat he thinks I am. FML

by confidence taken / 08/23/2014 at 2:26am / United States (Mississippi) / Intimacy

Today, after ignoring my concerns and declaring that "safety equipment's for pussies", my husband went rock climbing for the first time. He only sprained his ankle, but is acting like it's broken. He's now playing video games in bed and pissing in a bucket because walking is "too painful". FML

by Anonymous / 08/11/2014 at 12:27pm / Canada (New Brunswick) / Love

Today, at my job as a fast food manager, I saw one of my employees "trying to pick the bugs out" of our cookies. They were the raisins in them. FML

by mcmanager / 08/11/2014 at 10:18am / United States (California) / Work

Today, as I awoke, the sun was shining, the birds were tweeting, and police sirens were wailing at a drug bust next door. FML

by Ithoughtheywerenormalpeople / 08/11/2014 at 1:11am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I saw a customer at the restaurant I work at lovingly petting his cheeseburger and whispering sweet promises to it. FML

by weirded out / 08/10/2014 at 10:22pm / United States (California) / Work

Today, I finally felt ready for intimacy with my boyfriend, and I sent him a sexy picture of myself topless. He texted back, "Ewwwww." FML

by Anonymous / 08/08/2014 at 5:05pm / Israel / Intimacy

Today, I realized that my dog, who's 11, eats his own shit, and chews bones like crazy still has 10 times nicer teeth than I do. FML

by Anonymous / 08/08/2014 at 3:34pm / United States / Animals

Today, my husband jolted in bed and while still half-asleep said, "I had a nightmare; I dreamt we had a kid." I'm 8 months pregnant. FML

by mamagelmane / 08/08/2014 at 12:27am / France (Lorraine) / Kids

Today, I found out that if you wake your 7-year old sister up by plugging her nose, you'll wake up the next morning, taped down and unable to move as she pours ice water on you. FML

by younggirl101 / 08/05/2014 at 12:51pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Kids

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my blind date turned out to be my gynecologist. FML

by Anonymous / 08/04/2014 at 10:00pm / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, I went to a bookstore to get "The Grapes of Wrath". I have a problem with controlling the volume of my voice, so once at the counter, I accidentally said quite loudly, "WHERE ARE THE ANGRY GRAPES?" FML

by Face fucking palm / 07/22/2014 at 11:36pm / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I tried to break up with my boyfriend, because he's too manipulative. By the time our chat ended, instead of being single, I'm somehow now committed to going on vacation with him and his family. FML

by whatjusthappened / 07/21/2014 at 11:58am / United States (Oklahoma) / Love

Today, I accidentally twisted my balls in my own underwear so badly that I had to be hospitalized. FML

by Anonymous / 07/12/2014 at 4:19pm / United States (Indiana) / Health

Today, my little sister started freaking out, because she was playing with some white-out eraser and got some on her finger. She started crying inconsolably because she thought her entire finger was going to disappear. FML

by neryc / 07/04/2014 at 3:41pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Kids