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  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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pinkalicious18

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pinkalicious18
  • Town/Country : Not specified
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  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 429
  • Number of comments : 5
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 14 posted

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Today, I went to get my friend a drink while she sat in the lounge watching TV with my dog. When I came back, I found her licking my dogs ears. She said he dared her to do it. FML

#7540376 (99)

I agree, your life sucks (19013) - you deserved it (2069)

On 01/24/2010 at 7:28am - animals - by CheeseMonsters (woman) - United Kingdom (Reading)

Today, I was picking up my little sister from school and while waiting I decided to have a smoke. I was caught and was told to go to the principal's office. I'm 23. FML

#7508111 (158)

I agree, your life sucks (9344) - you deserved it (15454)

On 01/22/2010 at 9:10pm - misc - by oldschool (man) - United States (California)

Today, my boss gave me an evaluation form for him and told me it was totally anonymous. So, I decided to really be rude about it. At lunch, I asked a co-worker what he put on the evaluation, and he said, "What evaluation?" FML

#7458820 (60)

I agree, your life sucks (7041) - you deserved it (18535)

On 01/20/2010 at 5:29pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I was vacuuming our house because I wanted to help my parents. I wore a headset while listening to REALLY loud music. The vacuuming job took me two hours and when I took of my headset I noticed that I hadn't started the vacuum cleaner. FML

#7415658 (208)

I agree, your life sucks (6252) - you deserved it (41142)

On 01/18/2010 at 6:01am - misc - by Adrian16 (man) - Norway (Vestfold)

Today, I was at youth group. My foot had unknowingly fallen asleep, and as I got up to leave early, I spontaneously did a face plant in front of thirty other adolescents. Because my foot was still asleep, I had to bask in the embarrassment on the floor until my foot regained composure. FML

#7107635 (93)

I agree, your life sucks (14003) - you deserved it (2915)

On 01/02/2010 at 4:55pm - misc - by Fml1552 - United States (Oregon)

Today, I met my boyfriends mother for the first time and hoped to make a good first impression. When I tried to say 'Hello', a loud rippling burp comes up from my throat. And not only that. A small chunk of mucus flies out and lands on the floor between us. So much for a good first impression. FML

#7063669 (50)

I agree, your life sucks (16955) - you deserved it (3420)

On 12/31/2009 at 7:06pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Hawaii)

Today, my 25 year old brother ran into my room very excited at 8am. "Wake up! We got a new puppy!" he told me. I was so excited so I jumped out of my warm bed. When I asked him if he was serious he said "No, but we have to go to church, so get dressed." FML

#6937151 (43)

I agree, your life sucks (19763) - you deserved it (6293)

On 12/25/2009 at 10:30am - misc - by MessyMal (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I found out my ex got invited to our Christmas Party. I also found out that she got much more presents and money from my family than I did. FML

#6934422 (34)

I agree, your life sucks (19794) - you deserved it (1764)

On 12/25/2009 at 3:14am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, at work a female co-worker was struggling with a stack of boxes in her hands. Her pantyhose was falling down and she asked me to help her. So I pulled up her pantyhose. When I looked up, she had a horrified look on her face. She was asking me to help her hold the boxes. FML

#6934352 (119)

I agree, your life sucks (4887) - you deserved it (33468)

On 12/25/2009 at 3:10am - work - by harrassment101 (man) - United States (California)

Today, I invited my boss and his family over for dinner. As usual, I bought his kids Christmas' presents, nothing too fancy though. This year, he had one more that wasn't here last year. So I just pulled something from under the tree to hand him. He opened it on the spot. It was my sons Ps3. FML

#6933197 (132)

I agree, your life sucks (6864) - you deserved it (30819)

On 12/25/2009 at 1:30am - work - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I introduced my family to beerpong. They especially liked the part about distracting each other while shooting. My grandma flashed me. FML

#6933168 (67)

I agree, your life sucks (21207) - you deserved it (7922)

On 12/25/2009 at 1:28am - misc - by ScarredForLife (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, a car was tailgating and honking at me while trying to pass me, so I decided to be a bitch back and go extremely slow. We got to a two lane road and the car passed me up. The man in the front seat flipped me off while pointing to his wife in the back seat who was clearly in labor. FML

#6896852 (289)

I agree, your life sucks (7200) - you deserved it (41222)

On 12/23/2009 at 2:15am - misc - by lois2lane (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my mom and I were going to the store. I decided to stay in the car while she went in. In the car next to me, there was a dog in the driver's seat barking at me. Bored, I barked back at it until I realized there was someone in the passenger's seat watching me. FML

#6896062 (101)

I agree, your life sucks (5140) - you deserved it (20205)

On 12/23/2009 at 1:17am - animals - by ApolloandDixie (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, while eating a sandwich, I saw a worm. Knowing that my friend always tries to scare me with fake worms and insects, I bit it to show her I knew it was fake. It was real. FML

#6893264 (48)

I agree, your life sucks (6296) - you deserved it (18515)

On 12/22/2009 at 10:52pm - animals - by iHateWorms (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I discovered that my bed has a flea infestation. I discovered it after sleeping naked in it for about an hour. FML

#6883824 (69)

I agree, your life sucks (17433) - you deserved it (3800)

On 12/22/2009 at 1:02pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Georgia)