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pineappleducki's FML badges
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pineappleducki's favorite FMLs
by nk / 11/03/2010 at 12:39am / United States (Kentucky) / Animals
by blank / 07/21/2010 at 9:52am / United States / Health
Today, my boyfriend and I thought it'd be hot to have it off on the golf course once it was dark. Who would've thought that sprinklers start up once it's pitch dark. I got a lot wetter than I thought I would. FML
by Anonymous / 07/13/2010 at 4:31am / United States (Utah) / Intimacy
Today, I lost my phone. I tried to call it using my husband's phone, but couldn't figure out which of the three Kates in the contact list was me. Turns out, two are co-workers and one is his aunt. I was listed under Satan. FML
by Satan / 03/15/2010 at 7:22pm / United States (Washington) / Love
Today, I started to type up a mass text to tell a decent amount of my friends that I'd just come home to a surprise from my boyfriend. Trying to fix a typo, I accidentally hit send with the text only saying "Guess what?! I just came." FML
by anonymous / 03/14/2010 at 10:49am / United States / Geek
by Anonymous / 03/14/2010 at 9:19am / United States (Florida) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 03/14/2010 at 5:57am / United Kingdom (Newcastle upon Tyne) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 03/14/2010 at 3:54am / United States (California) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 03/12/2010 at 3:53pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex, when he finished, seemingly angry. He stood there naked complaining for 15 minutes about how our sex sucked. Then he demanded that I dress him because "it's my fault his clothes were off in the first place". FML
by cmore / 03/10/2010 at 8:10pm / United States (Connecticut) / Intimacy
Today, when I went to see a movie with my best friend, and there were 3 girls loudly discussing blow job techniques. I texted my boyfriend about how gross the conversation was. His reply was "Pay attention. You might learn something." FML
by ohno / 03/10/2010 at 6:05am / United States / Intimacy
by anonymous / 03/09/2010 at 1:43am / Australia (Victoria) / Love
Today, after puking all over the bathroom and my legs, I called my husband for sympathy. The first thing he says is "Did you cry?" and when I answered no, instead of wishing me better he quickly exclaimed "WHO'S MY BIG GIRL!" FML
by gotitEVERYWHERE / 03/08/2010 at 5:40pm / United States (Georgia) / Health
Today, my boyfriend said we should re-enact a porn episode he saw. I jokingly said yes. He had an outfit and everything. I thought it was going to be fun, until he started playing Bon Jovi in the background. FML
Today, I went to a party and crashed on the bedroom floor. I woke up to sex noises coming from the bed. I pretended to still be asleep. I sent a text to my boyfriend to tell him about it. I heard his phone beep from over in the bed. FML
by woopdeedo_1 / 03/07/2010 at 2:56pm / United Kingdom (West Sussex) / Intimacy
- Today, the girl I have been dating for the past five years asked me to move to California with her… Today, the only thing I got for my birthday was my boyfriend's offer to give me "the gift of anal".… Today, my girlfriend decided to invite her best friend over for a threesome. This would've been the…