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pikasqueak

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  • Number of visits : 487
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  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Visits<b>MikaykayUnicorn</b> - the 07/04/2014 at 3:00pm<b>worldclassrager</b> - the 05/24/2014 at 11:32am<b>Joshwarrior</b> - the 03/05/2014 at 10:22pm<b>origamidragon</b> - the 01/30/2014 at 10:01pm

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pikasqueak's favorite FMLs

Today, I was carrying my four-month-old son in a checkout line. An older couple behind us remarked that I would spoil my son if I carried him everywhere. My son responded by projectile vomiting all over the wife, then looked at me and giggled. FML

Today, I was at the local grocery store. I've had really bad gas lately, and I accidentally let one go while standing in line. The woman behind me thought it was her kid, and smacked him for farting in public. FML

#21214127
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27191) - you deserved it (35629)

On 07/19/2014 at 1:39pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my 3-year-old daughter asked me to carry her from the car to the house. I asked her for 3 kisses and a hug in return. She said she'd rather walk instead. FML

#21213512
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41405) - you deserved it (5806)

On 07/18/2014 at 10:56pm - kids - by kids say the darnedest things - United States (Colorado)

Today, I was at the mall in the food court, when some guy asked for my number. I turned him down, but I was impressed with how ballsy he was. Without thinking, I said, "I like your balls!" Half the place instantly fell silent. FML

Today, I decided to try something new with my boyfriend, and sexted him. My text ended up sounding so stupid that I panicked and quickly sent another saying "SORRY WRONG PERSON". FML

Today, my girlfriend was feeling down because she has put on some weight. I tried to make her feel better by showing her I can still pick her up. I can, and I was even able to hide the fact that I shat myself doing it. I'm so romantic. FML

#21200680
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50358) - you deserved it (7525)

On 07/06/2014 at 3:28pm - love - by oh shit (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I sent my boyfriend a picture of my boobs. I quickly found out that I'd accidentally sent it to my sister instead. She sent me one back. FML

#21196202
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40619) - you deserved it (22982)

On 07/02/2014 at 1:01pm - intimacy - by boob sisters (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I went on a date with this girl. Turns out she's a software developer, too. Our date became a technical discussion. FML

#21195553
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38628) - you deserved it (10350)

On 07/01/2014 at 9:20pm - love - by devdevdev (man) - Brazil (Rio Grande do Sul)

Today, I watched a Youtube video about artists who ripped off other artist's songs. All of the bands that were accused of stealing were all bands that I really enjoy. FML

#21194507
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34491) - you deserved it (9742)

On 07/01/2014 at 12:12am - misc - by dillon (woman) - United States (Arkansas)

Today, my wife has a bruise on her cheek from a nasty trip while practicing her yoga. She now thinks it's hilarious to flinch in public when I get near her, and keeps telling people she "walked into a door". I've gotten more dirty looks than I can count. FML

#21192543
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59427) - you deserved it (4611)

On 06/29/2014 at 1:26pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Nevada)

Today, my sister ran into my room unannounced while I was on webcam with a potential employer. Before I could react, she looked at my screen, said "Damn, he's fucking hot." and flashed him. FML

#21191852
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51649) - you deserved it (4711)

On 06/28/2014 at 8:26pm - work - by justno - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I spent the whole day doing a 500 piece puzzle. The last piece didn't fit. FML

#21191359
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42110) - you deserved it (5991)

On 06/28/2014 at 10:08am - misc - by Puzzlepiece - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my son got a beating. Apparently, he went to a club, waited until he saw a couple of girls pulling a duckface for a photo, then rushed over and threw pieces of bread at them. Their boyfriends, not too surprisingly, didn't appreciate this. I had to drive the idiot home from the hospital. FML

#21190541
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42702) - you deserved it (6106)

On 06/27/2014 at 5:15pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I went bowling with my girlfriend, her sister and her brother-in-law, and her niece. After 10 rounds, I came in last place. Her niece is 3 years old. She got twice as many points as me. FML

#21189057
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35802) - you deserved it (10744)

On 06/26/2014 at 10:58am - misc - by DF (man) - Israel (HaMerkaz)

Today, I went on a date with the girl I like, to see The Fault In Our Stars. She didn't cry, but I did. Twice, hard. FML

#21187944
201 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46439) - you deserved it (12107)

On 06/25/2014 at 1:45pm - love - by fredfredburger (man) - United States (Missouri)



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