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About piedpiper303 : So you strangers want to know about me? Great, more stalkers to deal with.
You know the phrase "don't take candy from strangers"? Well, Halloween pretty much defies that rule.
Hey, psst, you little kids who aren't supposed to be on here: guess what? The Easter bunny isn't real. Oh, and the one that steals your teeth? That too.
The Thumb strikes back
You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.
That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.
Why am I up so early?
You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.
Today, I went to the kitchen to grab some cereal. I guess my mum didn't hear me, because as I entered, I heard her ranting to herself about her "God damned fucking cheerios". I started to slowly back out, but I tripped over my own feet. She heard and yelled at me for "sneaking around". FML
Today, I started to come to during dental surgery. I clearly heard someone behind me say "Shit! Get this fucker back under!" then another person mentioning they'd have to kill me to avoid "another lawsuit", followed by laughter and the blackness of sleep. FML
Today, my new deodorant caused an allergic reaction, covering my armpits in a painful rash. I've had to awkwardly waddle around all day with my arms splayed outwards to get any relief. One customer at work sarcastically mentioned that it's nice that they're hiring penguins these days. FML
Thursday 28 November 2013