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Today, I was at the cafeteria of my school with my boyfriend and he dumped me. I was kinda expecting it. What I wasn't expecting was that he'd start running in front of everyone, screaming "FREEEEEEEEEDOM!" at the top of his lungs and that he'd kiss the first random girl he saw. FML
I agree, your life sucks (50190) - you totally deserved it (4429)
On 06/12/2009 at 2:39am - love - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Quebec)
Today, when petting my friend's dog, I acted like I was going to make out with him. While I wasn't looking the dog stuck his entire tongue in my mouth. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6400) - you totally deserved it (50041)
On 06/06/2009 at 3:44pm - health - by thedogkisser (man) - United States (Texas)
Today, I adopted a dog from the local shelter. I put the dog in the car and he was shedding everywhere, but I was ok with that because he was my dog. As I pulled into the parking lot, the dog began to poop in the backseat of my car. When I got him out of the car, he ran off. $100 for him to poop and run away. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30288) - you totally deserved it (5772)
On 05/19/2009 at 10:17pm - misc - by Debra2005 - United States (Texas)
Today, I got pulled over while dancing to crazy techno beats in the car. The officer RAN out of his car and up to mine and pounded on my window. He thought I was having a seizure. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30490) - you totally deserved it (11549)
On 04/24/2009 at 4:10pm - misc - by bdutton (man) - United States (Connecticut)
Today my hamster gave birth. The babies were very cute and I couldn't resist petting one. Apparently touching a baby hamster will cause it's mother to reject and devour it. I am now know in my family as "The Hamster Slaughterer." FML
I agree, your life sucks (37529) - you totally deserved it (14506)
On 04/20/2009 at 11:11pm - misc - by whymommywhy (man) - United States (New Hampshire)
Today, my mother called me downstairs to give me what I assumed was going to be "The Talk" (About four years too late). So she sits me down, holds my hands, and with the gentlest, most motherly expression on her face tells me, "Honey, if you ever come home pregnant, I'll kill you and the baby." FML
I agree, your life sucks (58216) - you totally deserved it (4555)
On 04/19/2009 at 10:09pm - health - by Litterbox (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I went to my new job at a pre-school. I was really excited because everything was going so well, and a little boy even said he was drawing a picture of me. He even gave it to me when he was finished. Well it was me, but I was also on fire and being stabbed and shot multiple times. FML
I agree, your life sucks (42627) - you totally deserved it (1654)
On 04/19/2009 at 7:07pm - work - by guessimdead (woman) - United States (Connecticut)
Today, a woman drove through my house. She was texting and eating watermelon at the same time. I didn't know that was even possible to do. Now my house is condemned. FML
I agree, your life sucks (71601) - you totally deserved it (1854)
On 04/12/2009 at 9:53am - health - by Fitz (man) - United States (North Carolina)
Today, I was trying on lingerie in the dressing room of Victoria’s Secret with my boyfriend next to me. I told my him in a seductive, playful tone “You can stay and watch if you give me a piece of your gum.” He said “No I only have three more” and left the room. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28538) - you totally deserved it (3097)
On 02/15/2009 at 6:35am - misc - by cjk004 - United States (California)
Today, I got in a huge fight with my mom. So, I went to my room and locked myself in there and played loud music so I didn't have to hear her. She then decides to yell at me over facebook. Shortly after, I log out of Facebook. She then starts yelling at me on Yahoo. Damn technology. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5134) - you totally deserved it (10575)
On 01/29/2009 at 7:45pm - misc - by blarg - United States (Illinois)
Today, in class, I was sitting next to the guy that I fancy. Shyly, I write our initials (L and A) into a heart on his hand to see his reaction… “I love Los Angeles too!” FML
I agree, your life sucks (38102) - you totally deserved it (15643)
On 10/13/2008 at 4:19am - love - by mocass’1 -
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