Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

philipino

Offline (4 hours ago) | Search for a member

philipino

5Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 1 September 1999 (15 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 3155
  • Number of comments : 178
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 12 posted

About philipino : I'm really sarcastic, and I play soccer and basketball.

Surprise I'm bi and goodbye

philipino's page activity

Visits<b>pratikp03</b> - the 12/06/2014 at 9:33am<b>ZY1431</b> - the 12/04/2014 at 2:58pm<b>bigblackcot</b> - the 12/01/2014 at 5:13pm<b>hduebdo</b> - the 11/29/2014 at 10:13pm<b>LegalLoitering</b> - the 11/25/2014 at 6:51pm<b>__Tron_Cat__</b> - the 11/25/2014 at 3:25pm<b>PicanteSeed</b> - the 11/25/2014 at 11:32am<b>reaxion</b> - the 11/24/2014 at 11:06pm<b>bomberos_08</b> - the 11/23/2014 at 5:30pm<b>natepowers</b> - the 11/22/2014 at 12:01pm<b>Mr_snuggels</b> - the 11/22/2014 at 10:57am<b>trisc97</b> - the 11/22/2014 at 10:02am<b>5secondsoffuck</b> - the 11/21/2014 at 12:28pm<b>angiotensin</b> - the 11/20/2014 at 11:29pm<b>niftyismybitch</b> - the 11/20/2014 at 9:07pm<b>Gaernem</b> - the 11/20/2014 at 6:36pm<b>vreid</b> - the 11/20/2014 at 6:20pm<b>ghosthuggers</b> - the 11/20/2014 at 5:58pm

Liked!<b>rileyburg</b> - the 11/19/2014 at 6:13pm<b>Kairicross</b> - the 11/02/2014 at 9:52am<b>LegalLoitering</b> - the 10/19/2014 at 5:12am<b>robertd73</b> - the 10/18/2014 at 6:57am<b>spockadelic</b> - the 10/18/2014 at 5:04am

philipino's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

See all of philipino's badges

philipino's favorite FMLs

Today, I started training as a bartender. My very first client told me how his wife is sleeping with her sister's husband. He then told me that all the women he knows only want sex, and asked me why "we" were like that. He could be my dad. FML

#20924792
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41885) - you deserved it (4402)

On 10/18/2013 at 1:14am - intimacy - by nerdywaitress (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I had to take my boyfriend to the emergency room to get stitches from cutting his arm during sex. I sat there while he explained to the doctor how it was the best orgasm ever. FML

#20924645
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45882) - you deserved it (6302)

On 10/17/2013 at 11:11pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Nebraska)

Today, I found out my handwriting is so bad that people think I write in Arabic. FML

#20922701
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41658) - you deserved it (9342)

On 10/16/2013 at 1:37pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Michigan)

Today, my grandmother called me in a fit of panic because her new neighbors are black. So is my fiancé, whom she is supposed to meet tomorrow. FML

#20921768
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46825) - you deserved it (4688)

On 10/15/2013 at 5:43pm - misc - by secretsmakefriends (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was hitting on a girl, and I was sure I could get her to sleep with me. When she finally gave in and was putting her number into my phone, she called my mom and asked her if she raised me to "sexually harass women." FML

#20918730
322 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21636) - you deserved it (81560)

On 10/13/2013 at 10:38am - love - by not getting laid - United States (Texas)

Today, I was talking dirty to my long-distance lover while touching myself, when a cockroach fell from my ceiling and landed on the hand I was molesting myself with. FML

#20915065
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48275) - you deserved it (16255)

On 10/10/2013 at 11:40am - intimacy - by DisgustinglyFrustrated - Argentina (Santa Fe)

Today, my "friend" came over. I caught him trying to steal my iPod on the way out. Proud of myself for catching him, I asked him to leave, only to realize that I had forgotten to actually take the iPod back from him before he left. FML

#20914586
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38079) - you deserved it (21801)

On 10/09/2013 at 11:03pm - money - by oneiPodlighter (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I repeatedly had to ask people to please stop groping the mannequins. FML

Today, I started to come to during dental surgery. I clearly heard someone behind me say "Shit! Get this fucker back under!" then another person mentioning they'd have to kill me to avoid "another lawsuit", followed by laughter and the blackness of sleep. FML

#20909921
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57183) - you deserved it (3381)

On 10/06/2013 at 5:49pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my paranoia got so bad that I had to physically restrain myself from aggressively confronting the kid walking behind me on the sidewalk. FML

#20909154
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34281) - you deserved it (5526)

On 10/06/2013 at 1:29am - health - by Angrily Paranoid (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, my neighbour came over with a bag containing lingerie, and apologized while blushing. Turns out his boy was the reason that my lingerie kept disappearing from my garden clothesline recently. His "boy" is over 20 years younger than me. FML

Today, I was reminded that while I have a nice waist, bum and boobs, I'm unspeakably ugly. I was walking down the street when a guy wolf-whistled from behind me, and when I turned around, he visibly recoiled in disgust. FML

#20908389
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46512) - you deserved it (3800)

On 10/05/2013 at 1:51pm - misc - by british_babe (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, my purse was stolen from my bag while I was on the train. The thief will be surprised to find that it wasn't my money purse, but in fact my "period purse". Hope they find tampons useful. FML

#20906908
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49349) - you deserved it (4196)

On 10/04/2013 at 5:39am - misc - by haveahappyperiod (woman) -

Today, my grandmother convinced me to come to a church meeting with her. My grandmother then made funny faces at me while the pastor was speaking, causing me to laugh out loud. Everyone heard me, including the pastor. FML

#20905574
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34419) - you deserved it (5019)

On 10/03/2013 at 1:24am - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I went with my boyfriend to his church youth group for the first time. I found out a girl there likes him, when she decided to pull me off him while we were hugging, and take my place. FML

#20903481
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43616) - you deserved it (2927)

On 10/01/2013 at 4:25pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Quebec)



FML's blog

  • Malec's illustrated FML
  • Life is like a box of chocolate full of piece of rabbit droppings sometimes, isn't it? OK, I'll admit that's a weird way to start an article a few days before Christmas. Let me explain: you try and get…

Friday 12 December 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: