Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

philipino

Online | Search for a member

philipino

3Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 1 September 1999 (15 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2463
  • Number of comments : 177
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 12 posted

About philipino : I'm really sarcastic, and I play soccer and basketball.

Surprise I'm bi and goodbye

philipino's page activity

Visits<b>yeatesj</b> - 36 minutes ago<b>MadLife136</b> - 37 minutes ago<b>acidicthinking</b> - one hour ago<b>BigLatchZatch</b> - 2 hours ago<b>Live_Love_Dream</b> - 2 hours ago<b>bmba94</b> - 2 hours ago<b>mathen</b> - 3 hours ago<b>wang33334</b> - 3 hours ago<b>Baucis</b> - 3 hours ago<b>giantsfan2010</b> - 3 hours ago<b>spockadelic</b> - 19 hours ago<b>chatokun</b> - yesterday at 3:14am<b>LegalLoitering</b> - the 10/18/2014 at 11:12pm<b>FrankHotpants</b> - the 10/18/2014 at 3:30pm<b>Mindset</b> - the 10/18/2014 at 3:10pm<b>lordkyron</b> - the 10/18/2014 at 3:02pm<b>metalguitarist89</b> - the 10/18/2014 at 2:43pm<b>atav</b> - the 10/18/2014 at 1:50pm

Liked!<b>LegalLoitering</b> - the 10/19/2014 at 5:12am<b>robertd73</b> - the 10/18/2014 at 6:57am<b>spockadelic</b> - the 10/18/2014 at 5:04am

philipino's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

See all of philipino's badges

philipino's favorite FMLs

Today, my strict Christian mother walked into my room just after I'd finished masturbating. Although dressed, I was still holding the used tissue, which she noticed. Having to think fast to disguise my deed and avoid an entire sermon, I had no option but to blow my nose with the spunky tissue. FML

#21009159
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49107) - you deserved it (25555)

On 12/29/2013 at 7:36am - intimacy - by Jizzyface (man) - United Kingdom (Cheshire)

Today, I am sitting next to a guy who very clearly has lice crawling on his head. It's a six hour flight. FML

#21006067
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43935) - you deserved it (2691)

On 12/26/2013 at 11:16am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I watched "Time of the Doctor" and I'm pretty sure my love of Doctor Who slithered out through my ear and shamefully lodged itself in the darkest corner of the room, crying. FML

#21005939
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30948) - you deserved it (7948)

On 12/26/2013 at 7:08am - love - by anon - Australia

Today, my mum and I were referred to as "ladies". I'm happy for her, since she always complains about looking masculine. However, I would still like to be called a gentleman, seeing as how I am one. FML

#21000124
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40108) - you deserved it (3222)

On 12/21/2013 at 11:58am - misc - by FML (man) - United Kingdom (Glasgow City)

Today, my boyfriend said he was in love with my best friend instead of me. I wouldn't be so upset if it wasn't the third boyfriend in a row this happened with. FML

#20997702
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51741) - you deserved it (4481)

On 12/19/2013 at 1:13am - love - by hot_friend (woman) - United States

Today, I received a poorly-written letter from my asshole neighbor in which he threatened to "sew" me because my dog shat on his lawn again. I went over, asked if he needed some wool for his sewing, and told him to stop being an idiot. Now he's apparently hiring a lawyer for real. FML

#20981890
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39095) - you deserved it (21705)

On 12/05/2013 at 5:26pm - misc - by possibly a sweater (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, my dad is forcing me to go shopping with him tomorrow for Black Friday, because he's convinced that my martial arts classes will come in handy when people "inevitably" try to beat the shit out of us in the rush for cheap stuff. FML

#20973740
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38139) - you deserved it (3240)

On 11/28/2013 at 2:13pm - misc - by fuck me (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I had a nightmare in which I was haunted by the ghost of my foreskin. I then spent the whole day moping around, wondering what my life would've been like if my parents hadn't opted to slice it off. Will I see you in heaven, long-lost ghostly foreskin? FML

#20972170
236 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31029) - you deserved it (14720)

On 11/27/2013 at 3:44am - health - by MissYouPieceOfSkin (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, my parents kicked me out of the house because they were having a party. They gave me twenty bucks to go see a movie. Well, the movie ended pretty quick, but the trauma of seeing my parents in a swingers' orgy will take some time getting over. FML

#20969815
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (66949) - you deserved it (5565)

On 11/25/2013 at 1:16am - intimacy - by why god - United States (California)

Today, my father took revenge on me for bankrupting him in a game of Monopoly. His revenge consisted of having a truckload of sand dumped in my driveway while I was at work. FML

#20966996
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38163) - you deserved it (3203)

On 11/22/2013 at 3:51pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I found out that my roommate secretly edited a paper I wrote and recently turned in, so that it repeatedly refers to the famed author "Kneel Gayman." I'm positive that's not how it's spelled. FML

#20958782
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32739) - you deserved it (2903)

On 11/15/2013 at 3:30pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, my mum staggered home, piss drunk. When I tried to walk her to her room, she shoved me away and cursed at me for being a "goody two-shoes". She then slurred "I fucked your mum", and informed me that my mum is a skank. That's good to know, mum. FML

#20958646
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40639) - you deserved it (2731)

On 11/15/2013 at 12:49pm - misc - by mummer11 (woman) - Ireland

Today, I watched my mother tell a man that the holocaust was "a good thing" and "necessary for population control". That man was my girlfriend's father. Who is Jewish. FML

#20958610
25 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50688) - you deserved it (3300)

On 11/15/2013 at 11:59am - misc - by Colby - Canada (New Brunswick)

Today, as my wife and I were getting intimate, I thought I would try a little "dirty talk". I whispered in her ear that I would "dick her down good". She couldn't stop laughing. FML

#20946325
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26495) - you deserved it (52940)

On 11/05/2013 at 10:26am - intimacy - by Something I said? (man) - United States (New York)



Zach Stafford's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Zach's illustrated FML
  • Everybody's talking about Ebola at the moment. I have trouble keeping up with the latest trends. I'm going to wait until Christmas and see what special offers turn up in the shops, under funky new names…

Friday 17 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: