Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

philipino

Offline (2 hours ago) | Search for a member

philipino

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 1 September 1999 (15 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2162
  • Number of comments : 174
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 12 posted

About philipino : I'm really sarcastic, and I play soccer and basketball.

Surprise I'm bi and goodbye
If you send me a joke I'll give you a high five

philipino's page activity

Visits<b>Chelsea_bella</b> - 8 hours ago<b>woainishamu</b> - yesterday at 12:09am<b>S232Flash</b> - yesterday at 9:14pm<b>Chente_313</b> - the 09/15/2014 at 5:44pm<b>gokuisthename</b> - the 09/15/2014 at 5:11pm<b>fairydust7</b> - the 09/15/2014 at 10:00am<b>Malcazar</b> - the 09/15/2014 at 1:47am<b>tourbo411</b> - the 09/14/2014 at 10:46pm<b>tengo</b> - the 09/14/2014 at 10:08pm<b>gabix3</b> - the 09/14/2014 at 8:35pm<b>straightpride</b> - the 09/06/2014 at 1:36am<b>Preposterous</b> - the 09/04/2014 at 12:06am<b>osnapitsalexx</b> - the 08/30/2014 at 9:27am<b>Taylor22294</b> - the 08/29/2014 at 12:55am<b>minimanion</b> - the 08/28/2014 at 10:55pm<b>cjspenny</b> - the 08/28/2014 at 9:56pm<b>totallybananas</b> - the 08/28/2014 at 8:38pm<b>mathen</b> - the 08/27/2014 at 5:02pm

philipino's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

See all of philipino's badges

philipino's favorite FMLs

Today, I was sitting cross-legged, idly jerkin' the gherkin. I guess I got slightly carried away, because I zoned out, forgot where I was aiming, and came all over the side of my face, up my nose and into my eye. FML

Today, a senile old lady came up to me and offered me chocolate. I noticed that it was ex-lax, so I politely told her no. My 4-year-old daughter pushed me aside and ate the ex-lax, because she thought it was candy. I now have a stinky child on a 3 hour bus ride, with no stops. FML

#20197580
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19825) - you deserved it (9663)

On 12/09/2012 at 11:29am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, after two weeks of being grounded, I was finally let out of the house by my mom. I had to call her at 1am asking her to come get me, because I got so drunk, I told my ride to leave without me. I'm grounded again after less than a day of freedom. FML

Today, my friend and I told each other about our boyfriends. They're both nice, kind, beautiful, talented, funny, sweet and smart. They also both have the same name. And house. And job. And car. FML

#20196037
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41523) - you deserved it (2764)

On 12/08/2012 at 5:44am - love - by ouch. - Canada (Yukon Territory)

Today, I was out clubbing. My girlfriend went to get us drinks, so I danced alone while I waited. Some girl with hideous meth mouth, who was clearly tripping balls, started harassing and groping me, and got all three of us kicked out when my girlfriend returned and beat the hell out of her. FML

#20195284
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21801) - you deserved it (2597)

On 12/07/2012 at 4:28pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I went to Hollister with my grandmother. She immediately started yelling about the music being too loud, and ordered the staff to "shut the damn thing off". She was yelling at a bunch of mannequins. FML

#20186953
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22340) - you deserved it (4077)

On 12/01/2012 at 5:53pm - misc - by time to put you down, gran (woman) - United States

Today, I was shopping when I overheard a woman telling an employee that she was buying an iPad for her 5-year-old son. Annoyed, I turned around and ranted about how he should have more age appropriate toys. Then she explained that her son is autistic and will be using the iPad to communicate. FML

#20183504
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8116) - you deserved it (82464)

On 11/29/2012 at 12:29am - misc - by Mimi - United States

Today, I was enjoying a nice bath, when one of my cats jumped up on the rim and started purring. I thought it was sweet, until my other cat ran in and body-slammed the first into the tub with me. Being a conscientious cat owner, I hadn't de-clawed them. FML

#20181270
201 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20954) - you deserved it (5830)

On 11/27/2012 at 2:52pm - animals - by Neutered (man) - United States (Alaska)

Today, my husband ran a nice warm bubble bath with extra bubbles. I undressed and slid down into the tub only to have the most ungodly pain go up my backside. Turns out he knocked his razor into the water when he added the bubbles. I now have two butt cracks. FML

#20181043
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27477) - you deserved it (1547)

On 11/27/2012 at 9:32am - misc - by Cracky - United States (Maryland)

Today, I found out that the woman from My Strange Addiction who can't stop picking her scabs is married. I've been single for two years and I don't even pick my nose. FML

#20179069
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19050) - you deserved it (2972)

On 11/25/2012 at 11:39pm - love - by Sam (man) - United States (Utah)

Today, my girlfriend came over to a family game night. Halfway through a game of Klingon Monopoly, my drunk parents started arguing because apparently, while my dad was in jail, he cheated on my mom with a Klingon whore. I doubt my girlfriend will ever visit again. FML

#20176987
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21419) - you deserved it (2239)

On 11/24/2012 at 6:11pm - love - by Eganstein (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, my room-mates were inspired by a TV show to make a "douchebag jar", into which we have to put money every time we say something obnoxious. It seems like I can't open my mouth without having to cough up £10. FML

#20176638
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6752) - you deserved it (22527)

On 11/24/2012 at 1:41pm - misc - by kay51 (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, my friends and I were playing truth or dare game. It was late and we were drunk, so they dared me to run naked into my neighbor's yard while yelling, "Help! The pixies took my penis!" I ran screaming right into their big family reunion. FML

#20172584
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7305) - you deserved it (32250)

On 11/21/2012 at 4:06pm - misc - by nekkidness (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, while at a red light, a guy in a tux and sunglasses doing the Gangnam Style passed over the crossing, followed by a man with a video camera. This isn't the first time I've stopped for people doing a Gangnam Style parody. FML

#20165330
196 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22097) - you deserved it (3436)

On 11/16/2012 at 10:52am - misc - by Gangnam (woman) - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)

Today, I watched my neighbor shake cat food calling, "Come here Mollie" at his back door. I then saw my own cat run into his house. I now know why my cat is so fat and never replies to me calling her Bonnie. I guess I'm being cheated on. FML

#20158567
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23949) - you deserved it (2474)

On 11/11/2012 at 5:10am - animals - by kitty - Australia



FML's blog

  • Matteor's illustrated FML #2
  • So, is everyone back from their vacation? Can we get back to regular programming? No? OK, I get it. You're all still crying about not being at the beach any more, well, I am anyway. And this time of year…

Thursday 11 September 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: